He did it again......

[DianaB]

I've waited to post this because I'm just so upset over it......Damon got drunk again while we were in Texas. I got a call from Dae Lynn so upset and crying so hard that I could barely understand what she was saying. I hate when this happens.

Damon came home on Wednesday night and told Dae Lynn that he was going back to the shop to work late (something that farmers often do) so she let him take the car so she wouldn't have to get up at 3 a.m. and pick him up (Damon doesn't have a license because of prior problems before they were married and doesn't drive hardly ever.) Anyway when she got up the next morning he hadn't come home. I'm not sure how she found out that he was in jail but it ends up that Damon went and got drunk, drove around in a farmer's planted corn field, got stuck, walked to a nearby house, got beligerent with the homeowner so he called the sheriff, got beligerent with the sheriff, tore up the inside of Dae Lynn's car, and ended up in jail.

The last time that Damon was in jail the judge told him that if he ever came back he'd be facing jail time so we're pretty sure that he's looking a year or possibly two in jail.

Dae Lynn and Damon had found a really, really nice double-wide trailer and were looking for financing and were trying to figure out how to get it instead of paying rent. I guess Damon's Mom called Dae Lynn and blamed her for causing too much stress on Damon. Dae Lynn sent her a text afterwards and let her know that she didn't appreciate what she had to say. I was proud of her for standing up for herself.

Dae Lynn's doing well. She knows that she's going to have to get a job and go on with her life. She's taking everything slowly and not making any quick decisions. She knows that with Damon in jail that there's no hurry to make any decisions. I can tell sometimes when she comes over that she's been crying and it breaks my heart.

Please keep her and the kids in your prayers. Thanks!!!

[Janet]

Oh Diana...hoow awful that Dae Lynn is still having to go through this with him. Maybe the jail time is just what he needs to really dry out good. An alcoholic will always be an alcoholic, the ones who don't drink are just in better control. Dae Lynn will have to decide if she wants to take the chance of this happening now and again throughout their marriage.

It's bad that Damon goes out and gets into trouble. My husband just drinks and hoards money for himself. Most people can't tell he's been drinking, but a few are beginning to question me.

I lwill keep Dae Lynn in my prayers. You were right in telling her she doesn't have to hurry and make a decision. Keep her close and make sure she knows none of his drinking episodes have anything to do with her.....it is not her fault.

[lynne b]

Diana, I am so sorry to hear this, I wondered when i seen your post on FB. No one has the right to blame Dae Lynn, she did not put the alchole in his hands, he is an acholic and has to accept the responsabilty for his own actions, and be ready to face the consequence that come's from those actions.
It's good that Dae Lynn is taking her time on makeing decisions, chance's are though he might end up doing in home detention, whih couldd make things harder for her. I would almost suggest if he got in home that he does it at his parents house, that way it is less stressful on her and the kids, although it could be more diffucult for Dae Lynn, he can still work and provide an income for his family, if he still has a job.

My dad was an alcholic till the day he died, no one believed my mom till he died from it.

I hope the judge will be easy on him so he can take care of his family. Sending prayers to you all.

[judy]

Diana, I'm so sorry this happened again! It is very hard to live with an alcoholic. It is good that she has some time to make her mind up about what to do, and good that she can go back to work.

I'm sure that you and Glen will do everything for her and the kids.

I will be praying for her, Daemon, the kids, and you and Glen, for the best possible outcome.

[gja1000]

I'm so sorry this has happened again. I'm afraid Damon is going to need a lot of help dealing with this alcoholism the rest of his life. It is a dreadful curse for some people, when they drink they have to go all the way to oblivion. I have a nephew like this and it is very bad when it happens. His wife divorced him and he has not remarried. I think it is better that he doesn't have to put a wife through all this torture.

[DianaB]

I started to answer this the other day and had a long response written when Dean slapped the computer keys and I lost it!!! The computer just facinates him!!

This has all been a HUGE mess!!!! Damon finally goes to court this afternoon so we'll hopefully know something.......but it could be as simple as assigning a lawyer for him. We'll see.

Dae Lynn's not going to be able to stay where she's at if Damon's in jail for very long because the rent is pretty high......so we're thinking that she's probably moving in here in a month or so. She's planning on getting a job and getting bills paid off so she's in better shape financially.

She's not sure about her marriage but is just taking a wait and see approach. She's upset but realizes that Damon needs help. She's just not sure where to find it and if he'll stick with it.

I've had the kids every day this week and when I don't have the kids I'm trying to work on my flower (hosta) beds. The house is a big mess!!! Plus there are other things that are a part of all of this that makes it very stressful. Again, the family isn't very supportive and that makes things harder.....not just for Dae Lynn but for me as well. I am so ready for a weekend away!! I've been thinking about going to my Aunt Marva's but while it's nice outside I need to get my hostas planted.......it will be too hot soon.

[Janet]

Sure wish I could make things better for you and for Dae Lynn.

[paula1961]

Diana I'm so very sorry to hear this. I will keep you and your family in my prayers. I hope that Damon will seek the help that he needs. Sending hugs to you dear friend.

[lynne b]

Diana, I am sorry you and your family are going through this, it never just involves just the person who has the problem, it always ends up invovling the whole family. The judge may court order him to go to AA or some other kind of support group, which would be good cause then he would have no choice in the matter.
Hope you get good news.

[DianaB]

They went to court today and I'm not sure what it was for. As long as Damon has a job they'll let him out on work release. Damon works for my brother-in-law and he has to talk over with his wife whether they'll keep him on or not. Damon can also go to the church and mow the lawn and do maintenance if it's ok'ed with the Pastor. Dae Lynn's happy that he'll be able to work. Fingers are crossed that he still has jobs!!!

Also, he has to go back to court on June 17th.

[gja1000]

I am really glad that he'll get to go to work and I do hope he still has a job or jobs! It will really help Dae Lynn to have his income. I sure hope things work out.

[DianaB]

Thanks for all of your support!!! I love all of you guys!!!!

[Janet]

I want the best for Dae Lynn and the kids. Not sure Damon should even be in the picture. That sounds horrible, but I saw what my sister went through with her alcholic husband. They never had anything....he drank the money. They always rented and the homes were not in the best shape, only what they could afford. Her husband drank at least a case of beer a day. She should have kicked him to the curb.

You all know what I go through with my alcholic spouse....I pray that Dae Lynn can really take the time to see what may lie ahead for her with Damon.

[JJJ]

I hope he gets in shape :(

[judy]

I'm praying for the best possible outcome.

[DianaB]

Thanks everyone!!! Dae Lynn is looking for a job (which in a small town is hard to find) and she says that she will NEVER be dependent on Damon again. This has really put her on the spot by not having hardly any income. She cleans at the church but it's only a few hours a week and it's not enough to live on. Dae Lynn is VERY capable of managing her money and she'll have to always have a job if she wants to ever have much because of Damon.....and she knows that. She points out that he does have his good sides and she does love him. It's not like he's drinking all the time....it's only a couple times a year but he just goes off the deep end. She's insisting that Damon get some rehab before he comes home.....we'll see what happens with that because we have a month before he goes to court and our jail needs the funds of him being here because they're broke (it's a political thing). So I'm not sure what will go on......however Dae Lynn's willing to let Damon go even after he's out of jail. We'll just have to see what happens.

Dae Lynn's a strong girl and she's just dealing with what she has to deal with. She's not sitting around feeling sorry for herself or playing the victim. She knows what she needs to do to keep her family going and she's willing to do it. I'm very proud of her!!!!! Of course, I think that it helps her to know that her Mom and Dad are behind her!!!

[Janet]

Of course you and Glenn are behind her...she is a lucky young lady. I was so impressed with her when I met her. Dae Lynn is someone you instantly like. I wish her the best in whatever she decides to do and in whatever may come her way.

Is there another town near where she might have better luck finding a job? I'm keeping my fingers crossed for her.

[judy]

It sounds like she has a very good head on her shoulders! Having a plan, like she does, makes it so much easier.


She is so lucky to have yours and Glen's support too. This is a time that she really needs stable people behind her. I wish her and her family only the best!

[Janet]

How are things going for Dae Lynn and Damon? Tell her I'm thinking of her.

[DianaB]

Things are going good. Damon can get out of jail on work release so he's been doing maintenance at the church. He gets out a couple of days a week. He also helps my BIL farm but he's not sure that he's ready to have him work for him yet. He wants him to suffer in jail a little longer.....which makes me upset because Dae Lynn could really use the money that Damon can earn. I tell you....I get so upset with some people!!!!

Dae Lynn hasn't heard anything back yet on any of her jobs.....but she's heard of a para job at the school which would start in the fall and she's interested in it. It would be a great job and she wouldn't have to work when the kids were out of school. Of course, she'd have to find a job to get her by until school started.

Dae Lynn talked to Damon and found out more of what happened. I guess that he went by some neighbor's house to talk to him about his hay and they offered him a beer.......several times........then they made fun of him for not taking it. It was after several beers that he called his friend to bring out some harder stuff from town. So it wasn't because of his PTSD (Post Tramatic Stress Disorder) but just because he had been tempted. Dae Lynn was furious at Damon!!!! I really think that this will be the LAST time that she ever deals with this. She's treating this completely different this time than she ever has before so Damon better listen up!!! She has layed down the law on some things.....one is that while he's in jail he better get rid of his chew!!! Or she'll kick him to the curb!!!! And there were other things but I can't remember them!!!! She's a strong cookie!!!

Her birthday is on the 6th of June and she wants all of us girls to go shopping at Wichita so she has it all planned......well, except for the babysitter for the kids!!! That's kinda' falling apart so we may have to take them!!! I think that we'll have to go shopping after her birthday because I'll be out of town then!!

[Janet]

I'm so glad she's putting her foot down and sticking to it. I really admire how strong she is. How long is his work release program?

[DianaB]

It can be as long as he's in jail. The downfall is that it costs him $20 each day to get out and that adds up pretty quickly. He has to go before the judge in June to find out what his sentence is.