Gary is gone

[gja1000]

My sweet beloved Gary passed away about 7:00PM tonight. His heart just went into an arrhythmia and they could not shock him out of it. I'm so very sad, I'm probably in shock, yet I knew this day was coming, but I didn't think it would be today. He went quickly and didn't suffer and I am so grateful for that.

I know your hearts are breaking for me and mine is broken too. But I'm OK. I've known for 9 years this day would come, I just didn't want it to be today. My friends have been with me all evening, and one is staying the night. My son-in-law Bryan had to go to the hospital this evening for a diverticulites attack, so I am going to Houston tomorrow to be with them. We are all so very sad, but so very glad Gary is not sick and feeling badly anymore.

Gary actually felt better today, a lot better. We had a good day together, we watched TV, played cards and talked. We kissed and said "I love you" to each other. I have no regrets there. I want him back, but it just wasn't meant to be. We had 30 wonderful years together, he is my soulmate, I will love him forever.

[lynne b]

Oh Gayle, I am so so sorry, I wish i could be there right now for you to give you a big hug.
I am glad you had a good day together, something you will treasure in your heart.
You think you are prepared for this day but it still is such a shock when it happens.

You sounded like the perfect couple, the couple that everyone dreams of being when they marry, you loved each other very much, we all could feel that in your post about your life together.

R.I.P. Gary and know that your loveing wife will be looked after by her family and friends. Take care Gayle and we love you. Prayer and thoughts are with you.
Lynne

[Janet]

I'm in shock....Gayle I just don't know what to say, I was so sure he was on the mend. My heart is breaking for you and feel like there is something I should be doing to help you. I'm glad you two had a good day together and that there are no regrets. I truly loved reading your sweet posts about Gary, you both had something very special. I'm so sorry Gayle...love you!

[DianaB]

Oh no, Gayle. I read the first sentence.....that Gary had passed and was in complete shock and the tears are coming for you. I know that you're going to miss him terribly.....he was such a big part of you. I so wish that I was there to give you a big hug. I'm here if you need to talk or I can be there if you need me to come. I'll be praying for you and your family. Hugs.

[Blueyes]

Oh Gayle. I have no words, except that I hope you can feel my arms wrapped around you.

[Lindsey]

Oh my gosh Gayle, I am in shock with you and everyone else. I also thought he was getting better. My heart is just breaking for you. I wish I could give you a big hug right now!!

[JJJ]

Oh Gayle this is truly shocking even if you knew this day will come. My heart is heavy just thinking about the tragedy. We all know your a strong person. Many hugs to you. I know Gary is looking down on you with nothing but love and admiration from his wife.

My thoughts are with you and your whole family. XOXO

[judy]

Oh dear Gayle, I am so sorry. It is hard to believe. You both fought this so well together.

I know you are missing him. You spent every day enjoying life and each other.

Please know that you are in my heart, and that I, too, miss Gary. I have come to know him, and this is a very sad day.

[Gina]

Gayle honey I to was in shock when Diana posted on FB I didn't realize that she was talking about you and Gary. For last I read he was doing better and you had spent a good day together. My heart breaks for you there are no words. You have been blessed for 30 wonderful years and have always been by Gary"s side. He is looking down at you with love and you will hold him forever in your heart .. My prayers are with you and your family. hugs Gayle

[DIANE W]

Oh Gayle...... I am so so very sorry for your sudden loss, i am truely shocked right now, i cant believe what i have just read.

Words cant describe how you must be feeling right now, i know you said you knew it was going to happen eventually, and it must be such a lovely comfort to you that you were such a close couple, not many people have that in a relationship, so that is lovely.

I just want you to know i am thinking and praying for you and your family, and your right..... your lovely Gary is not suffering anymore and he is at peace.

Sending you a big big hug, take each day at a time and make sure you look after yourself now.

[gja1000]

Thank you everyone. Your words and your support mean the world to me. I am so lucky to have had the love of my life with me for 30 years. I wanted it to last forever but it was not to be. I want you to know that I'm OK, its really hard, but I am with my kids and we are helping each other through these hard times.

[Janet]

It's comforting to know that you are with family. We know you're okay and you'll be okay, but right now, we are heartbroken for you. You mean so much to all of us that when one of us is hurting, we all feel it. Know we are with you in spirit and we're here anytime you need us. Love you

[gja1000]

I know Janet, and it means so much to me. It's so interesting how my 4WT family is so very important. Just a few years ago I would never have dreamed that I could become so attached to friends I had never met in person. It is so comforting.

[gja1000]

I should tell you all that Gary was very adamant that he did not want a funeral and did not want a viewing of his body. He wanted to be cremated and have some of his ashes sprinkled in his favorite lake in Oklahoma. He wanted his friends and family to gather at the lake, eat, play cards, tell stories about him, be together, and remember him with more joy and less sadness. So, this is what we will do in the next few weeks, I'm not sure when. I told his sisters (4) to pick a weekend to get together, it doesn't matter when. I think they are having trouble with the non traditional aspects of his wishes, but I must do as he asked me. I am so at peace with his wishes though, because traditional viewings and funerals are very hard. Because there is not a funeral for people to send flowers, we have asked that people donate to a Yorkie rescue, or other charity. Gary would be so happy with these arrangements.

[lynne b]

Gayle, that sounds like a beautiful way to remember Gary, i am glad that you are sticking to what Gary's wish's were. Funerals can be very depressing and drawn out, instead of remembering the good life that you shared together.
I am thinking of you and my prayers are with you.

[DIANE W]

Gayle... I think that is such a wonderful idea of Gary's, funerals are such a hard time for loved ones to get through, at a time when they are already suffering so much. At least this way Gary has spared everyone that, and even though it is not exactly the traditional way to do things ............. it is what Gary wanted and that is ALL that matters now.

I think it will be a lovely way to remember him, not that you will need to be reminded Gayle, he will be with you every day anyway, in your heart.

Lots of love to you and take care.

[judy]

This is a lovely idea, Gayle. Gary should be celebrated!

[DianaB]

What a sweet way to be remembered. That's exactly what I would think that Gary would want. A lot of people are being cremated and then having services done later......less stress about getting together and lower costs. I think it's a wonderful idea!!!

[Blueyes]

It's definitely a break from southern tradition, and I'm all for it! I think it is a perfect way to celebrate a life well lived. I'm sure his sisters will adjust to the idea. Mike wants to do much the same as Gary has chosen. Big surprise again, huh?
I just hurt for the pain you are going through, but thank God for your strength!

[JJJ]

Gayle, Gary is my kind of man. I hate traditional funerals and I can totally understand his point of view. I think it's wonderful your doing Gary's wishes, good for you.

Celebrating Gary will be beautiful :40::40::40:

[gja1000]

Thank you all so much for your kind words. I truly cherish each and everyone of them.

I was really tired yesterday. We stayed up too late the night before. But I slept well last night and hopefully I'll feel better today. I was going to go home today, but Abi asked me to stay one more day. She has to go back to school tomorrow for finals week, so she'll be busy then. She adored her Papaw, and she's having a hard time. I lost my grandpa at age 14, and I remember how hard it was for me. I have no reason to hurry home, so I'll stay one more day. My daughter has been cooking me meat and fresh vegetables. I hadn't eaten well at all the past couple of weeks while Gary was in the hospital, so I really need the nutritious food.

The get together for Gary will be June 23rd. Next weekend is just too soon, the following weekend is father's day weekend, so we will have it the following weekend.

[judy]

I am so glad you are with family right now. Two weeks sounds like a good space of time before the get together. You don't want it too soon, or it will not be as meaningful, since everyone is probably in a bity of shock now.

I love you, my dear friend.

[Janet]

I so agree with Judy. Waiting another day will not hurt, enjoy being with the ones you love and the ones that love you. It will be a good thing to wait.

[DianaB]

I'm glad you stayed the extra day with the kids. I'm sure they need that connection with you. It sounds like your daughter is taking good care of you......maybe you should stay a few more days!!! It will be hard going home. My heart goes out to you.

I think that you've set the perfect time to get together for Gary's memorial service. Everyone will have time to plan to go.

[paula1961]

Gayle, I am so very sorry for your loss. I know that your heart is broken. I think that the way that Gary wants to be remembered is wonderful. Traditional funerals are sooo hard and sooo sad. Prayers of comfort are being sent to you dear friend.

[judy]

Hi Gayle,

I hope today went okay for you.

Love you!

[Janet]

Thinking of you Gayle.

[gja1000]

I posted under "what did you do today". I'm going to start posting there. I need to get back some normalcy.

[judy]

I think that is a good decision Gayle.

[2tiredmom]

Gayle, I am so sorry to hear about Gary. Glad you have family to help you though this. You are in my prayers.

[Janet]

Not sure Diana or I can do this, but would you like us to see if we can close this thread? It's totally up to you. If you want us to, we'll try, if not...I'm sure it will slowly get hidden. I just don't want you to be hurting everytime you see this thread.