RLC12345678
09-10-2006, 01:35 PM
Pregnancy, Estrogen and Women
> Pregnancy Q & A & more!
>
> Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
> A: No, 35 children is enough.
>
> Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
> A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.
>
> Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?
> A: Childbirth
>
> Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes
she's borderline irrational.
> A: So what's your question?
>
> Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during
labor, but pressure. Is she right?
> A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air
current.
>
> Q: When is the best time to get an epidural?
> A: Right after you find out you're pregnant.
>
> Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while
my wife is in labor?
> A: Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you.
>
> Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from
childbirth?
> A: Yes, pregnancy.
>
> Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?
> A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.
>
> Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel
and act normal again?
> A : When the kids are in college.
>
> "ESTROGEN ISSUES"
> 10 WAYS TO KNOW IF YOU HAVE "ESTROGEN ISSUES"
>
> 1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem.
> 2. You're adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet.
> 3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans.
> 4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say.
> 5. You're using your cellular phone to dial up every bumper
sticker that says: "How's my driving-call 1- 800-".
> 6. Everyone's head looks like an invitation to batting practice.
> 7. Everyone seems to have just landed here from "outer space".
> 8 You can't believe they don't make a tampon bigger than Super
Plus.
> 9 You're sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy.
> 10. The ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday.
>
> TOP TEN THINGS ONLY WOMEN UNDERSTAND
> 10. Cats' facial expressions.
> 9. The need for the same style of shoes in different colors.
> 8. Why bean sprouts aren't just weeds.
> 7. Fat clothes.
> 6 Taking a car trip without trying to beat your best time.
> 5. The difference between beige, ecru, cream, off-white, and
eggshell.
> 4. Cutting your hair to make it grow.
> 3 Eyelash curlers.
> 2. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made.
>
> AND, the Number One thing only women understand:
>
> 1. OTHER WOMEN
>
>
> Pregnancy Q & A & more!
>
> Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
> A: No, 35 children is enough.
>
> Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
> A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.
>
> Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?
> A: Childbirth
>
> Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes
she's borderline irrational.
> A: So what's your question?
>
> Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during
labor, but pressure. Is she right?
> A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air
current.
>
> Q: When is the best time to get an epidural?
> A: Right after you find out you're pregnant.
>
> Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while
my wife is in labor?
> A: Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you.
>
> Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from
childbirth?
> A: Yes, pregnancy.
>
> Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?
> A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.
>
> Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel
and act normal again?
> A : When the kids are in college.
>
> "ESTROGEN ISSUES"
> 10 WAYS TO KNOW IF YOU HAVE "ESTROGEN ISSUES"
>
> 1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem.
> 2. You're adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet.
> 3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans.
> 4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say.
> 5. You're using your cellular phone to dial up every bumper
sticker that says: "How's my driving-call 1- 800-".
> 6. Everyone's head looks like an invitation to batting practice.
> 7. Everyone seems to have just landed here from "outer space".
> 8 You can't believe they don't make a tampon bigger than Super
Plus.
> 9 You're sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy.
> 10. The ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday.
>
> TOP TEN THINGS ONLY WOMEN UNDERSTAND
> 10. Cats' facial expressions.
> 9. The need for the same style of shoes in different colors.
> 8. Why bean sprouts aren't just weeds.
> 7. Fat clothes.
> 6 Taking a car trip without trying to beat your best time.
> 5. The difference between beige, ecru, cream, off-white, and
eggshell.
> 4. Cutting your hair to make it grow.
> 3 Eyelash curlers.
> 2. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made.
>
> AND, the Number One thing only women understand:
>
> 1. OTHER WOMEN
>
>