It's 2:30am...

[AngieDoogles]

and I can't sleep. I miss my Papaw so much. Is it normal to still feel so sad that I am in tears every night?

[Mandy]

Awwww Angie, im sorry you feel so sad. Its very normal to miss a loved one, hope you feel better soon girl. Thinking of you! :)

[Marilyn]

Angie, what you are experiencing is very normal. When my father passed away, I felt much the same. I was in a meeting at work one day and burst into tears. Time makes it better, but you will still think of him, miss him, and wish he were there to share things with and there will be things you will want to ask him. It's just the circle of life.

[Janet]

Angie, it's all perfectly normal. I find if I let the feelings flow, it's so much nicer and trying to stop them. It does get better with time.

[Tink]

Angie, as the others have said, it very normal, and does get better with time. What I've learned is that the oddest little things will trigger it. When my nephew passed, I found myself breaking down in a department store when I saw something with a dinosaur theme because he had been enthralled by anything with dinosaurs. When my grandpa passed, I couldn't stand to be around a certain friend when he smoked because he smoked the same brand cigarette as grendpa and the smell of the smoke was a trigger for me.

Just expect to grieve and give yourself permission to fall apart at times. It's no fun, but is necessary to get through it.

[RLC12345678]

Angie, I'm so sorry to hear about your grandfather. I know I'll be feeling the same way as you are now when my grandfather passes. Losing a loved one is tough. (((((hugs!))))

[AngieDoogles]

Thanks everyone. I didn't go to bed until well after four that night, but I did a lot of good writing, so I guess it worked out alright. It's just that when I lay down in bed I have more time to think about things and be sad than I do during the day...

Thanks for letting me know this is normal though. I really appreciate you guys.

[judy]

Dear Angie,

Of course it's normal. We're all here for you and just go on feeling whatever you have to. I'm sure Brendon is being wonderful too.

We have a saying at my Women's Center Support Groups. "You have to go through it to get through it." It's not always easy, but it is how to heal.

Since my father died, by the way, I have kept up a relationship with him. I tell him what I need to share with him, I still love him, and I still feel his love. It could very well be my imagination, or it could be real. I don't care - it makes me happy. I'm just saying....

Friends,
Judy

[AngieDoogles]

I'm so sorry about your father Judy, but I'm glad you have a peace about it and still feel close to him. Thanks for sharing that.

[judy]

Thanks Angie. He was a strong, very healthy man and was complaining to me for several months that he just didn't feel right. It was so unlike him to complain. I went down to Florida to visit him and he and my stepmother and I went to his doctor to get some test results.

The doctor told him the bad news, that he had lung cancer. I was so glad I was with him at that moment. He was determined to fight it and win. When I knew that he was going to lose the fight, my heart broke for him because he wanted to live.

Fortunately for him, he was gone within 7 weeks of being diagnosed. He didn't have to suffer for very long. I went to visit him several times, took my daughter down, but I wasn't with him when he died. I'm sure God was there though.

I feel that now he is really happy. He had a wonderful family. We're Romanian, and had this close, large clan. I'm pretty sure that there's some Gypsy blood from that side of my family. My father's grandmother told fortunes for a living! Now, I can feel that he's with them and they're all together like always. He's with his younger brother, who died before he did, his parents, my mother, and all of the rest. He's also with his army buddies, old friends, and I know he's keeping an eye on me. I have asked him to really watch over my daughter, and I know he does.

I'm just glad he's happy now and not sick anymore. My love for him hasn't changed one bit, and I don't feel that his love for me has changed either.

I'm not saying that his death was easy for me, but this is how I found peace with it.

I hope it helps,

[Taurus Babe]

Angie,
I'm so sorry for the loss of your gpa. I can't imagine the pain you are going through right now, but your sleepless nights seem only normal. Time will heal your broken heart.
I was just at a funeral for my bf's gma. It was soo sad, but it reminded me that she was living a new life, somewhere else, and she was back with her husband, and she is happy.
I hope you can try and find things like this to alleviate some of the pain and loss you are feeling right now. You have a little angle on your shoulder now...

My deepest condolences to you Angie.