Marilyn
02-11-2008, 05:02 PM
Okay, I know this is long, but there's not much new stuff to read on here, so take your time and enjoy!!!
Subject: Golf
A nun walks into Mother Superior's office and plunks down into a chair.
She lets out a sigh heavy with frustration.
"What troubles you, Sister?" asks the Mother Superior.
"I thought this was the day you spent with your family."
"It was," sighed the Sister. "And I went to play golf with my brother.
We try to play golf as often as we can. You know I was quite a talented
golfer before I devoted my life to Christ."
"I seem to recall that," the Mother Superior agreed.
"So I take it your day of recreation was not relaxing?"
"Far from it," snorted the Sister. "In fact,
I even took the Lord's name in vain today!"
"Goodness, Sister!" gasped the Mother Superior, astonished.
"You must tell me all about it!"
"Well, we were on the fifth tee ... and this hole is a monster - 540 yard
Par 5, with a nasty dogleg left and a hidden green...and I hit the drive
of my life. I creamed it The sweetest swing I ever made. And it's flying
straight and true, right along the line I wanted...and it hits a bird in
mid-flight not 100 yards off the tee!"
"Oh my!" commiserated the Mother. "How unfortunate!
But surely that didn't make you curse, Sister!"
"No, that wasn't it," admitted Sister.
"While I was still trying to fathom what had happened,
this squirrel runs out of the woods,
grabs my ball and runs off down the fairway!"
"Oh, that would have made me curse!" sympathized Mother.
"But I didn't" sobbed the Sister.
"And I was so proud of myself, and while I was pondering whether this
was a sign from God, a hawk swoops out of the sky and grabs the
squirrel and flies off, with my ball still clutched in his paws!"
"So that's when you cursed," said the Mother with a knowing smile.
"Nope, that wasn't it either," cried the Sister, anguished, "because as
the hawk started to fly out of sight, the squirrel started struggling,
and the hawk dropped him right there on the green, and the ball popped out of his
paws and rolled to about 18 inches from the cup!"
Mother Superior sat back in her chair, folded her arms across her chest,
fixed the Sister with a baleful stare and said
"You missed the DAMN putt, didn't you?"
Subject: Golf
A nun walks into Mother Superior's office and plunks down into a chair.
She lets out a sigh heavy with frustration.
"What troubles you, Sister?" asks the Mother Superior.
"I thought this was the day you spent with your family."
"It was," sighed the Sister. "And I went to play golf with my brother.
We try to play golf as often as we can. You know I was quite a talented
golfer before I devoted my life to Christ."
"I seem to recall that," the Mother Superior agreed.
"So I take it your day of recreation was not relaxing?"
"Far from it," snorted the Sister. "In fact,
I even took the Lord's name in vain today!"
"Goodness, Sister!" gasped the Mother Superior, astonished.
"You must tell me all about it!"
"Well, we were on the fifth tee ... and this hole is a monster - 540 yard
Par 5, with a nasty dogleg left and a hidden green...and I hit the drive
of my life. I creamed it The sweetest swing I ever made. And it's flying
straight and true, right along the line I wanted...and it hits a bird in
mid-flight not 100 yards off the tee!"
"Oh my!" commiserated the Mother. "How unfortunate!
But surely that didn't make you curse, Sister!"
"No, that wasn't it," admitted Sister.
"While I was still trying to fathom what had happened,
this squirrel runs out of the woods,
grabs my ball and runs off down the fairway!"
"Oh, that would have made me curse!" sympathized Mother.
"But I didn't" sobbed the Sister.
"And I was so proud of myself, and while I was pondering whether this
was a sign from God, a hawk swoops out of the sky and grabs the
squirrel and flies off, with my ball still clutched in his paws!"
"So that's when you cursed," said the Mother with a knowing smile.
"Nope, that wasn't it either," cried the Sister, anguished, "because as
the hawk started to fly out of sight, the squirrel started struggling,
and the hawk dropped him right there on the green, and the ball popped out of his
paws and rolled to about 18 inches from the cup!"
Mother Superior sat back in her chair, folded her arms across her chest,
fixed the Sister with a baleful stare and said
"You missed the DAMN putt, didn't you?"