I completely understand the "need to do things". When my hubby came down with heart failure almost 5 years ago, we came up with a "bucket list" (before the movie came out!!!). Persons with his diagnosis live an average of 8 years after diagnosis. I know he'll live longer - heck, he has a good nurse!!! :) But we certainly started traveling and doing some of the things we wanted to do together.

Then, this last spring, his best friend, who was 65 years old, healthy as a horse, did not have one single chronic illness, developed MRSA (methicillin resistant staph aureus) and died within a week. That REALLY solidified our vow to try to do the things we could in the next few years.

My husband adores the mountains, and prior to his heart problems, we vacationed in the mountains of Colorado/NM every summer in our fifth wheel camper. Now, he cannot tolerate the altitude and it just killed him to have to give up those trips. Last summer, we discovered that much of Alaska is at sea level, yet there are gorgeous mountains everywhere! Thus, it is the best of both worlds for him. He can breathe at sea level and he can gaze out at the magnificent mountains - not to mention the fabulous fishing available in Alaska. This summer, as we topped the hill overlooking Homer Alaska, he said, "This is the most beautiful place I have ever seen in my life". When I think that I was with him while he was viewing the most beautiful place ever, it just brings tears to my eyes. It is because of our vow to accomplish what we can from the bucket list, that we took the plunge and topped that hill.

Five years ago, my husband was in pretty good health, working fulltime and just woke up one morning in full blown heart failure (at age 54), no warning, it was just there. He has not been able to work a day since. It was such a shock - but bottom line, it can happen to anyone.

So yes, everyone, do the things you can - while you can do them - you never know what tomorrow will bring.

Gayle, I've been wanting to make a "bucket list", but Hubby's not an adventurer. We're home bodies, but there are a few things I want to do before I kick it. I hope you get to do all the things in your bucket and add more to it!

Gayle, I'm so sorry about your husband. You've mentioned that he has problems but I didn't know to what extent. At least instead of sitting in a chair you are both getting out and doing the things that you love. I was sorry to hear that he couldn't go to Colorado to see the mountains but was very happy that you found a wonderful alternative. You're a good wife!

Then head over here!!! The boys will be gone Sept. 26, 27, and 28....

You wouldn't drive would you? I was just checking again (because of the want to do things mood) and from my house to yours is 12 hours 35 minutes. That is waaay to long to drive.

I am sorry some of you are feeling the same way...and yet for different reasons. I just want to find a camper or motor home and hit the road. I won't be able to retire for quite some time yet, but I've only been to Chicago, Florida (and the states inbetween there and Indiana) and Texas (I flew). I want to see more of our country. Not the cement monument type things, but beautiful rivers, mountains, Grand Canyon...you know. I'm feeling a bit of an urgency for some reason. I think it may have something to do with my mom....I don't know.

Let me check my calendar and I'll get back to you on those dates.

Thanks Diana. I'm kinda off topic - it is supposed to be camping - LOL - so I will say that despite all his physical ailments, we still love to go camping!!!

In addition to heart failure, he is an insulin dependent diabetic (he wears an insulin pump), he also has moderate kidney failure, and he has a pacemaker with an internal defibrillator. He has asthma and significant lung damage from a fungal infection a few years ago. Two years ago, one of his lungs collapsed spontaneously, they never could tell us why. He had open heart surgery with four bypasses. He has had two significant heart rhythm problems resulting in hospitalizations. He's been in the hospital 8 times in the past 4 1/2 years. He is also hearing impaired and wears bilateral aids due to many years using power saws in his work as a carpenter. All the ailments just do not seem fair - he's never drank or smoked. He has never been overweight. He got plenty of exercise in his work as a carpenter - he just has BAD GENES!!!

Despite all this, we are still working on our bucket list - going CAMPING every chance we get!!! :)

Gayle I feel bad your husband is going through all this. I really think I would have a very difficult time not falling into a depression.

Sounds to me like he has a wonderful loving wife and that can make all the difference in the world. I'm glad you all enjoy camping so much....so do I. Now to find that perfect camper that will contain all the doggies...lol

Wow Gayle, you're dealing with a lot. How are you doing? Your husband is probably getting a lot of attention from everyone with all of his ailments. Are you doing alright? It sounds like you're handling everything alright but you know that if you ever need anything to let me know!

You are so sweet Diana! In fact, I have studied and worked with family caregivers for the past 16 years in my work as a nurse, educator and researcher. Although I can clearly see what is going on, it is difficult to "take care of myself". I have to work - and I love my job - but it can be stressful and overwhelming at times. I'm very lucky though in that I can work at home and be available by phone if I need to be home or at the hospital. Clearly though, I was experiencing symptoms of caregiver overload and burnout this past year.

You see, my 86 year old mom has also lived with me for the past 6 years. She had a small stroke, her vision was affected, and she couldn't see to drive and lived in rural Oklahoma with no social services, thus, couldn't manage on her own without being able to drive, so she moved to Texas with me. This past spring, my daughter asked if she could come stay with her (for a variety of reasons) - we thought maybe for 6 months, but she is going to stay longer. I'm not sure how long. It was a great relief to me - I didn't realize how much of a relief it would be.

I have to learn to take my own advice, which is sometimes hard. If I've said once, I've said a zillion times to caregivers, "you must take care of yourself or you won't be able to take care of your loved one". I've been living that - but am doing much much better now!

Thanks so much for asking and for caring. :)

You are so sweet! Thanks so much. He does take anti-depressants, it is standard treatment in heart failure. He really needs them too - it is such a shock to be active and do what you want, and then to not be able to do much at all, especially so suddenly. Even though it has been 4 1/2 years, he still gets angry sometimes about what he can't do.

Haha your post just made me think... I wonder how far of a drive I am from everyone! So I checked the where you live thread and went to mapquest...
Janet, I'm 23 hours from you :(
Diana... 21 hours :(
Only 16 hours from Tink!!!
lol looks like I won't be getting any visits!