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Tink 11-20-2007 11:58 AM

Mixed emotions
 
My 19 yr old dd came to me last night with a pregnancy test stick in her shaking hand, tears running down her cheeks, and asked "Am I reading this right?"
Yep, she's pregnant.
She went to the clinic this morning and had it confirmed. While she was there she scheduled an appointment with a pregnancy counselor for next month.

She's been battling ovarian cysts so has had very irregular periods, so couldn't go by that alone. She had 3 periods in 4 weeks... so wasn't sure when she ovulated. She'd been having symptoms that made her suspicious, which is why she tested.

She's dating a 26 yr old who had asked her to marry him a few weeks ago and she turned him down as she felt she was too young and it was too soon. He seems to be quite thrilled at this news thank goodness.

I'm relieved that she's not 14 like a couple of her friends were when they had babies. She will be 20 before she has hers. I'm glad she's got her HS diploma, is with the father who seems to plan to stick around, and isn't a drunk, druggie, or freeloader like most she's dated. She already told me she will be keeping the baby and realizes her partying days are over. I'm glad the father is working 2 jobs in hope of being able to buy a house in the near future.

I am concerned that she's so young, unmarried, hasn't gone to college yet, and this will change her life forever. I made her promise me she will NOT decide to marry him JUST because of the pregnancy.

So I'm in shock. Babies are so precious and I know this one will be greatly loved, but Oh My...

katepoet 11-20-2007 12:11 PM

I commiserate with you - changed plans, a young mother, young grandparent...

I also congratulate you - a responsible response from your daughter, a good man who loves her, a baby to hold. And her health didn't keep this from happening - in that way she is blessed.

Let me know if I can help at all.

rivermom 11-20-2007 12:29 PM

I think it's wonderful. Just the words you wrote "pregnancy test stick in her shaking hand, tears running down her cheeks, and asked "Am I reading this right?" is wonderful. Your daughter came running to you and that shows such a wonderful blessing!!

Congratulations Tink to both you and your daughter. :p Everything happens for a reason and she shared with you a moment in her life that both of you will remember forever. She's gonna be a Mommy and you are going to fall in love with a grandbaby. Doesn't get much better than that! All that other stuff will fall into place, no worries. :rolleyes:

DianaB 11-20-2007 12:46 PM

Tink, I sent you a PM.

Mandy 11-20-2007 12:53 PM

I sure can understand you having mixed emotions, but like you said, she has a good man, who works hard to make a living, that shows a lot of who he is.
In time to come, you will all find out what the reason is, but think of it as a Blessing, because it is.

Tink 11-20-2007 01:42 PM

Thanks all.
I was really reluctant to even post this news. My mind and heart are just in a turmoil right now.
I SO love the 2 grand babies I already have, but they were born when my oldest was happily married, well into her mid and later 20's and a much more stable person.

I want that same kind of stability and healthy environment for this future baby and fear it's going to be a lot more of a struggle for a young mother to provide.

Janet 11-20-2007 02:07 PM

Congratulations Tink. I know you may not feel congratulations are in order, but the arrival of a baby is truly a blessing. In all honesty, most babies are not born at the 'right' time, but loved just as much and more. Your daughter has everything going for her, especially a mother like you.

DianaB 11-20-2007 02:46 PM

Just remember, Tink, that God is good and He can take what's wrong and make it right. Good things can come from this. I'll keep your daughter in my prayers. :hug:

Tink 11-20-2007 02:48 PM

Thank you Janet.
No one was more surprised than I that Katie came to me like she did. For years I've been her worst enemy. She wanted me to tell her Dad for her, and I refused... saying it's HER news to share. So she did call him today and he seems to be taking it quite well.

I'm relieved that she's been to the clinic, and is taking care of things without any prompting from me. She is with 2 of her friends who both have toddlers, so they're able to give her help from their experiences. I think that's a good thing for her right now.

Gina 11-20-2007 03:24 PM

Congratulations Tink, this is joyous news. A baby is always a blessing. Like Diana has mention God will provide. The baby will start life with loving parents and wonderful grandparents..

Forgivenmom5 11-20-2007 07:35 PM

Tink, I know that baby will be loved very much and will make you all very happy. It is a scary time but God will see you and your daughter through.

Janet 11-21-2007 05:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tink
Thank you Janet.
No one was more surprised than I that Katie came to me like she did. For years I've been her worst enemy. She wanted me to tell her Dad for her, and I refused... saying it's HER news to share. So she did call him today and he seems to be taking it quite well.

I'm relieved that she's been to the clinic, and is taking care of things without any prompting from me. She is with 2 of her friends who both have toddlers, so they're able to give her help from their experiences. I think that's a good thing for her right now.


It's really a shame that some mothers and daughters have to go through so much turmoil. You've read my remarks about my mother. How sometimes we just can't be in the same room with each other and I've even made the remark that "I love her, I just don't like her very much."

We all know in our hearts that our Mothers/daughters truly love us and we them and when things get tough, we pulled together. This is going to bring you and your daughter even closer, just as my mother's health has brought us closer. God truly has a plan for everything.

DianaB 11-21-2007 07:56 AM

I hope that things look a little brighter for you today, Tink. Right now you're in shock over the news but as time goes by you'll find that things are going to work out and you'll become more and more excited about the baby. It will all work out. Believe me.

AngieDoogles 11-21-2007 03:24 PM

Wow, Tink! That must have been quite a shock. Like Diana said, I'm sure you'll get more and more excited as time passes. Good luck and Congratulations!

Emmsmom 11-21-2007 06:33 PM

I know things are hard now , but I am sure that things will work out. HUGS


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