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-   -   Would like to read what your advice would be: (http://www.4womentalk.com/forums/showthread.php?t=5428)

Happy2BMe 08-28-2008 01:02 PM

Would like to read what your advice would be:
 
My 32-yr old daughter married for 9 years, has begun to make noises about possibly having a baby. She met with her neurologist about this and was told that she would need to taper off on the med that she takes to control seizure. This would be a three month period. At the same time she would also be coming off of birth control and is not to attempt to get pregnant for three months so that all excess meds can be out of her system save for the new lower dose of seizure med.

She was told about possible birth defects of either spinal bifida or heart problem. She will more prone to morning sickness (which she freaks out if she even thinks she might throw up), and the possibility of premature birth. She would be under a specialist gynocologist. There's always the chance that she may have a seizure during the pregnancy.

I have the one child. I am just dying to be a grandmother but do not want to have my daughter harmed in anyway due to the pregnancy. I've mentioned to her and for her to also talk it over with her husband that they may want to consider a surrogate. Do any of you know anything about surrogacy? What would be your advice if this was your child? Thanks.

Happy2BMe 08-28-2008 01:10 PM

I tried to edit but had run out of time, anyway, I forgot to mention that my daughter has epilepsy.

Lindsey 08-28-2008 01:31 PM

I agree it may not be worth the health risks to your daughter and the baby if she has it herself. I don't know much about surrogacy but I'm sure it could be something emotionally hard to deal with, for the mother AND the surrogate mother.
I really don't know what else to say, but I hope someone here has some better advice for you!
Has adoption ever been a consideration? There are a lot of babies and children out there who need families.

Janet 08-29-2008 09:50 AM

I can't offer any advice, except to say she and her husband should research all the options. It would be scary healthwise, but I know how bad I wanted a baby and would have done most anything to accomplish it.

Shada 08-30-2008 07:37 AM

My sister also has epilepsy. She has the grand mal seizures. They came upon her in her senior year in high school 36 years ago.

She went on to marry and had two children. I was very worried during her 2nd pregnancy, as she had a seizure in her in-laws bathroom with the door locked. She had fallen against a heater. By the time her husband got the door off, she had severe burns on her hip and had to have skin grafts. She was 8 months pregnant at the time. Her baby was born and is just fine, and now has 3 children of her own.

Every situation is different. Your daughter should talk to her Doctor of course.

Happy2BMe 08-30-2008 02:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shada (Post 75272)
My sister also has epilepsy. She has the grand mal seizures. They came upon her in her senior year in high school 36 years ago.

She went on to marry and had two children. I was very worried during her 2nd pregnancy, as she had a seizure in her in-laws bathroom with the door locked. She had fallen against a heater. By the time her husband got the door off, she had severe burns on her hip and had to have skin grafts. She was 8 months pregnant at the time. Her baby was born and is just fine, and now has 3 children of her own.

Every situation is different. Your daughter should talk to her Doctor of course.

Wow! Thanks for relating this story about your sister here...it helps.

DianaB 08-30-2008 07:08 PM

I can tell that this is a hard thing to let your daughter do. I'm sure that you're very worried about it and I can understand why. I agree with Janet in saying that your daughter needs to do a lot of talking to the doctor and weigh this decision very carefully. She and her husband need to be in complete agreement. Keep us posted on what's going on so we can keep her in our prayers.

Gina 08-31-2008 04:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DianaB (Post 75297)
I can tell that this is a hard thing to let your daughter do. I'm sure that you're very worried about it and I can understand why. I agree with Janet in saying that your daughter needs to do a lot of talking to the doctor and weigh this decision very carefully. She and her husband need to be in complete agreement. Keep us posted on what's going on so we can keep her in our prayers.

I agree with Diana and Janet she needs to do a lot of researching and soul searching.. Good luck and my prayers are with her also.

HALEY 09-05-2008 05:26 AM

Seizures that's a tough one, but again with any pregnancy there are always risk that are envolved, age, health, what you eat, drink etc. like the other ladies said she needs to do some research and consult with her doctor, i would hate for her to go thru life wondering what her child would look like, not knowing the joys of being a mother, how wonderful your life changes due to a child, i wouldn't trade it for the world!. I just wanted to wish her all the best and just pray for her that God will bless her on her discission.


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