holy cow! ok so as i was about to go over to his apartment and break up with phil last night...<--- i was ticked...pissed...very angry lol
he comes bursting into mine and starts crying! this is the man that doesnt even cry when a family member dies. i was scared.. i thought maybe he'd gone nuts.
well he sits down and just pours out his heart and apologizes so much i couldnt even get a word in edgewise.
he tells me that hes been so worried about his office and making money to support us that hes been making himself sick. he said that yday he got so nervous about it that he just started yelling at me for things he wasnt even mad at me for! he then proceeded to say that he appreciates me( blah blah..you know the normal.. i love you..you really are there for me) and that hes going to do things to show me that he does appreciate all the stuff i do everyday and basically he promised that we would start opening up to each other and talking about things b/c he doesnt ever want to get that upset about something again. <---hello?? why are guys so bottled up???
the really nice thing was that he opened up about
everything last night.. saying that he didnt want to ask me to marry him b/c hes afraid that the office might not work out. and he wasnt talking to me about his problems b/c he didnt want me to see him in a position to where he needed help. but he did say that he values my advice and we sat down last night and made a list of all the things i think that we need to do to his office! it was great.. ive never seen him this calm and free. it was like he had a million things inside and he just couldnt say them...but finally last night he did.
thank you so much ladies for listening to me yell yday! it was horrible... but at least i was able to tell him that if it ever happens again that im leaving. now he has no excuse to hold his emotions inside
hopefully our relationship will be even stronger now.