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What kind of stove vents out of the front? Especially in Texas!!! Imagine 104 degrees, cooking, and getting hot flashes!
I had another boring day. You are right, Gayule. I do have the blahs.
I found a letter from my first love, Gary. He was the love of my life, actually. We grew up together; went steady for about 4 years, from 14 to 18, and then back and forth for another couple of years. Whenever I hear music from that time, I get such nostalgia, that sometimes tears comee to my eyes. He took his own life at about 30 years old. I don't know what happened exactly, except that he just gotten crazier and crazier. Somebody told me it was from drugs, but I never pursued it.
Long story short, the letter was from him when he was 29, and it really rocked my world. He was coherent, did love me, but was definitely losing it. It has opened up a lot of questions for me, even though it was 35 years ago that he wrote it!
My questions are why do I pick unstable guys? He kept referring to how crazy I had been, so am I crazy? I guess I was, but not anymore. Everybody is crazy in their own way, I think. I'm pretty comfortable in my own skin now, but thinking back, I don't know how I was then. The last question is why did he break up with me? Didn't he love me enough? I know that is a ridiculous question, after so many years. I certainly could not have married him , and I don't remember planning on that. I have to just sit with these feelings, and see where they take me. Actually, I'm not sorry that I have to work these things out. It just popped into my life out of the blue! I also am so sad that happened to him. He never got to live his life.
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