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I think you're right. It is DEFINITELY a respect issue. As for controlling it, if you know anything about computers, it is really easy to find out if he's been viewing something like that. I wouldn't recommend looking unless you are pretty sure and want to have proof, because doing that would be invading his privacy and could possibly cause serious problems in the relationship (whether you find something or not)...but I guess if there is a reason to not trust him then maybe it would be necessary for your peace of mind... idk
I think the better route would be to talk about it. If he really cares about you, he'd be honest and you could tell him how it makes you feel. Open communication is always best, in my opinion.
As a side note, I have a friend who is in the process of getting a divorce because her husband refused to stop looking at porn. My husband and I had to clean off tons of viruses from her computer on several occasions that he had picked up from porn sites. Watching porn can definitely become an addiction and can be detrimental to a marriage so be careful...
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