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Im new here and just lurk but i can relate to your post. i was in a relationship much like yours for 6 years. at night my ex expected me to have sex no matter how tired i was or how bad i felt. if i didnt feel like it he would get mad and not speak to me. it didnt take much to make him mad and sometimes i didnt know why. he just would stop speaking. he was never physically abusive but if i didnt want to have sex he would accuse me of having someone else on the side. i got sick of trying to please him and make sure everything was always perfect so he would be happy but i was miserable. i finally filed for divorce. im much happier now and we actually stayed friendly. best of luck to you.
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