{{{{{{Shada}}}}}} I know the pain of losing a child before it was born. I had a miscarriage 18 years ago. It was one of the hardest times I've ever gone through. I'm so sorry that your husband wasn't the support that you needed at that time and your relationship suffered for it. I remember how hard it was for my husband because he didn't feel the connection to the baby that I felt and it was difficult for him to understand my grief.
We can't change the past even though we would like to. What's done is done. We did the best with it that we knew how and even though we have regrets we probably wouldn't change a thing if we were to do it again. It's what has brought us to the place we are now. Don't let your memories from long ago take the sunshine out of your life today. I'm praying that God will be close to you today and that tomorrow will arrive bright and clear.