I was going to say Jingle came across as a bit psycho in her response to Betty.
I was also going to bring up the fact that she never said anything about having children with him. Come on now, just because she is 23, does not mean she is not educated on how to use protection. She opened this thread up for opinions, it's not a free for all on her life and however she is choosing or not choosing to live it.
This thread is getting out about as out of control as I had anticipated it would!
None of us are perfect, and since when are any of our relationships?
All we know about the woman, is what her fingers have typed since she's joined and so far I see her having to defend herself every post when all she wanted was some sort of support system in a moment when she felt scared and alone.
I know I certainly felt that way more than a few times in the first few years we started out. And as I said, I am woman enough to admit and face dead on that I have been down some very rough bumpy paths years ago, so I speak from experience.
It is possible he struck her out of fear after he felt attacked. It doesn't make him horrible in my books, just a regular, insensitive (at times) man who reacted and deserves a chance to prove himself to her. If she puts her foot down, and tells him "look that got out of control, I don't want to live that way let's start fresh"... do you think he'd not agree? I'm sure he'd rather put it behind him as well.
And how is this for mind blowing, I don't even think they need anger management. I think they need better communication and to support one another through those rough emotional patches.
I made it a point whenever we had our arguments, to talk to him afterwards and tell him exactly how he made me feel taking things out on me, rather than talking to me. When you help someone to see their behavior through someone else's eyes, that is a tremendous experience and I have been told more than once "thank you" when someone I love asks me for an honest answer regarding their behavior, because they had never known that was how they handled something until it was pointed out to them.
Is there any hope left for this thread, or have we nothing better to do than instruct her to simply give up? Sure there are "plenty of fish in the sea", but can (most of) you imagine your lives without your husbands? Or how would you have felt trying to figure out the complexity of navigating an adult relationship in the beginning if that were all that was being told to you. To give up on the man you love because he didn't fit what other people thought was proper of him.
Betty, I never said thank you for sharing your story with us.
