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*Hugs* I'm sorry you are having to deal with this Gayle. I definitely understand, at least a little, what you're feeling. I felt similar when my mom was diagnosed with cancer. It is tough to deal with. You are an amazing, strong woman and Gary is lucky to have you in his life (and vice versa).
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"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." ~MT
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