Passion, Intimacy, and Commitment

[AngieDoogles]

This is what we were discussing in my Developmental Psychology class today and I thought it was interesting!

Intimacy is the emotional closeness shared in a relationship
Passion is the initial "I'm in Love" feeling...weak knees, butterflies in your stomach...sexual desire falls in this category as well
Commitment is pretty self explanatory.

What stage are you at with your boyfriend or husband? Those who have been married for a long time, does this change over time and if so is it a significant change? Are you happy with where you are (some are perfectly content without all three)? I was just curious...I'm very interested in the inter workings of marriages for some reason...

[Marilyn]

Your marriage relationship definitely changes over time, significantly. It deepens and matures in a way that is difficult to adequately describe. When you first marry you are two people, in love, but you are still getting to know each other. There is intimacy and passion. You experience lots of different emotions. There is conflict as you get to know each other, and this conflict is essential to your truly opening up to one another and achieving true committment. As you go through both good times and bad together, taking care of one another through sickness, sadness, conforting one another through all the ups and downs of life, sharing intense joys together, you begin to really connect in a way that is very strong and as I said difficult to describe. Committment grows and matures.

[Mandy]

Definatly changes over the years, it becomes stronger, and like Marylin said its difficult to describe.
By looking at hes/her face, can tell what they are thinking, words are not always needed. Less stress on the relational part because you dont have to "prove" yourself, or make yourself clear and explain things on how you really mean what you say or act upon.
These marriages also still need working on, but in a different way. I guess its like nurturing, and looking after what you have. You go thru so many trials and tribulations, which in a way makes the relationship a lot stronger.

[AngieDoogles]

Originally Posted by Mandy

By looking at hes/her face, can tell what they are thinking, words are not always needed.

Haha, I couldn't even begin to tell you how many times this happens each day with us.

[Tink]

Having been married forever, we long ago tested out the committment angle.
Passion is just a long forgotten memory, intimacy is non existent when he's gone most of the time and the house is filled with adult children when he is home.


I definitely have my own opinions on this, but would love to know what the rest of you feel are the 3 biggest stressors on a marriage. Anyone care to share?

[AngieDoogles]

Originally Posted by Tink

I definitely have my own opinions on this, but would love to know what the rest of you feel are the 3 biggest stressors on a marriage. Anyone care to share?

Well Tink, I haven't been married very long, only three years, and we don't have children so that probably means our stressors are much different than yours, but here they are:

1. Drama that we are caught between because of friends (we know a lot of newlyweds and so many of them are having problems...it's really stressful. We know two couples who are going through divorces right now. Sometimes we have different opinions about the best approach to take)
2. My emotions at times (sometimes I am overemotional and feel neglected or unloved when that is not his intention)
3. Hubby's forgetfulness at times (sometimes he forgets to do the things he says he will do like take out the trash, this contributes to #2)

[Chandra Amaya]

1. Financial situations...no matter how much you try to keep this from affecting your marriage it does.
2. transitions through the stages of a marriage. For instance leaving the "newlywed stage".
3. problems with kids & other people around you