The Economic Stimulus Package and how it benefits you

judy · 02-04-2010, 07:36 AM

Subject: Economic Stimulus Ideas

Sometime this next year, taxpayers will again receive an Economic Stimulus payment. This is a very exciting program. I'll explain it using the Q and A format:

Q. What is an Economic Stimulus payment?

A.. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.

Q. Where will the government get this money?

A.
From taxpayers.

Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?

A. Only a smidgen.

Q. What is the purpose of this payment?

A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.

Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of Asia ?

Answer: Shut up or you don't get your check.

Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the US economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:

1. If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, your money will go to China

2. If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to Saudi Arabia

3. If you purchase a computer, it will go to India

4. If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico , Honduras and Guatemala

5. If you buy a car, it will go to Japan or Korea

6. If you purchase useless plastic stuff, it will go to Taiwan

7. If you pay off your credit cards, or buy stock, it will go to pay management bonuses and be hidden in offshore accounts.

Instead, you can keep the money in America by:

1. spending it at yard sales or flea markets, or

2. going to baseball or football games, or

3. hiring prostitutes, or

4. buying cheap beer or

5. getting tattoos.

These are the only wholly-American-owned businesses still operating in the US .

Conclusion: The best way to stimulate the economy is to go to a ball game with a prostitute that you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day until you're drunk enough to go get tattooed.

paula1961 · 02-04-2010, 08:24 AM

Soooooo true!!

Janet · 02-04-2010, 02:24 PM

Loved it Judy....good one!!!!

MaddieBoo · 02-04-2010, 05:28 PM

Hahaha Brilliant!

DianaB · 02-05-2010, 09:50 AM

Probably more true than not!!!! Isn't it sad?

judy · 02-06-2010, 08:44 AM

This is my favorite!

"Q. What is the purpose of this payment?

A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy."

02-04-2010, 07:36 AM	#1
judy Donating 4WT Yakker Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Denver, NY Posts: 8,097	The Economic Stimulus Package and how it benefits you *Subject:* Economic Stimulus Ideas Sometime this next year, taxpayers will again receive an Economic Stimulus payment. This is a very exciting program. I'll explain it using the Q and A format: Q. What is an Economic Stimulus payment? A.. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers. Q. Where will the government get this money? A. From taxpayers. Q. So the government is giving me back my own money? A. Only a smidgen. Q. What is the purpose of this payment? A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy. Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of Asia ? Answer: Shut up or you don't get your check. Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the US economy by spending your stimulus check wisely: 1. If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, your money will go to China 2. If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to Saudi Arabia 3. If you purchase a computer, it will go to India 4. If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico , Honduras and Guatemala 5. If you buy a car, it will go to Japan or Korea 6. If you purchase useless plastic stuff, it will go to Taiwan 7. If you pay off your credit cards, or buy stock, it will go to pay management bonuses and be hidden in offshore accounts. Instead, you can keep the money in America by: 1. spending it at yard sales or flea markets, or 2. going to baseball or football games, or 3. hiring prostitutes, or 4. buying cheap beer or 5. getting tattoos. These are the only wholly-American-owned businesses still operating in the US . Conclusion: The best way to stimulate the economy is to go to a ball game with a prostitute that you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day until you're drunk enough to go get tattooed. __________________ *Judy*

02-04-2010, 02:24 PM	#3
Janet Moderator Donating 4WT 18K Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: INDIANA Posts: 21,624	Loved it Judy....good one!!!! __________________ To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven. ECCLESIASTES 3:1

02-04-2010, 05:28 PM	#4
MaddieBoo Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Calgary, AB, Canada Posts: 129	Hahaha Brilliant! __________________ Maddie

02-05-2010, 09:50 AM	#5
DianaB Moderator Donating 4WT 13K Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Kansas Posts: 16,069	Probably more true than not!!!! Isn't it sad? __________________ ´¨) ¸.•´¸.•´¨) ¸.•*¨) (¸.•´ (¸.•` ¤ Diana Baker ✞ You and I are friends....... Always remember that if you fall I will pick you up...... After I stop laughing!!!

02-06-2010, 08:44 AM	#6
judy Donating 4WT Yakker Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Denver, NY Posts: 8,097	This is my favorite! "Q. What is the purpose of this payment? A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy." __________________ *Judy*

02-04-2010, 08:24 AM	#2
paula1961 Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Kentucky Posts: 3,383	Soooooo true!!

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