I am scared.

I am scared of men between the ages of 20 and 50. Let me back up. Today we were at the laundromat, and this guy was watching me the entire time. Then, when we goy our clothes out of the drier, I noticed that one of the shirts bled all over the other clothes, and I got mad at my husband because he had separated them, and I said his name and last name out loud without even noticing. The creepy guy was right there and he had a smile on his face. Now, I am paranoid because I think he will track us down or something.
Afterwards we came home and were smoking a cigarette outside when a cab showed up. The cab driver kept looking at me while he was waiting for his customer to come out.
I am sooo scared that someone will break into our house and rape me or otherwise hurt me. I realize that it is not rational for me to fear every creepy man that looks at me, but I was abused when I was a child and teenager, so I practically get paralized with fear everytime something like this happens. I cannot shake the feeling off. I had my husband install 4 different locks/bolts on each door so I could sleep better at night.
I just started seeing a therapist, but I cannot contact her every time I have these little crises. I needed to talk to someone, because sometimes just getting it out helps. Anyhow, thanks for listening.

[2tiredmom]

I hope it works out for you. That has to be really hard. I can't imagine feeling that way. You sound like your fairly young. Your in my thoughts and prayers.:

[Tink]

I'm sorry you're so scared Pink.
I hope you're able to get past that so you're feeling better soon.

[Lindsey]

I can't say I know exactly how you feel, but I was raped when I was younger and I did go through a period of being scared and intimidated by any guy who looked like he could overpower me. Do you think it would help if you enrolled in a self-defense class? I know some places have classes exclusively for women, which deal with situations that many women might face. Maybe the confidence to know what to do and how to protect yourself might help to alleviate your fears a little.

[Necee419]

Originally Posted by Lindsey

I can't say I know exactly how you feel, but I was raped when I was younger and I did go through a period of being scared and intimidated by any guy who looked like he could overpower me. Do you think it would help if you enrolled in a self-defense class? I know some places have classes exclusively for women, which deal with situations that many women might face. Maybe the confidence to know what to do and how to protect yourself might help to alleviate your fears a little.

Great idea!! I think it would be so beneficial for you try something like this. You need to be empowered so you don't have to feel afraid anymore. I am so sorry you feel this way, but I feel that you should be commended for taking the steps to overcome it by seeing a therapist. And whenever you feel the need to get things off your chest and your therapist is unavailable, you can always come on here. We may not be therapists but we are willing to listen and offer you comfort. Best of luck to you.

[Janet]

Seeing a therapist is a great first step, congratulations for that!! Also the self-defense classes sound like a great idea.

I do want to share that when I was younger and afraid...I would "fake" confidence....and after a while..you know...I was more confident. If you tell yourself or act one way long enough, it becomes habit. Tell yourself that you're a young confident woman and act like it. Maybe you'll realize that is exactly what you are!!!

[khardy57]

Therapy and self defense both sounds like good ideas to me. Your hubby changed the locks and you're aware of your surroundings so you're on the right track. I'd continue the therapy and make sure you always take care to be vigilant.

I'll pray for you.

[Kimberley]

*Hugs* to you! I'm so sorry that happened to you as a child/teenager. When something like that happens, the victims never fully recover but you're taking the right steps in seeking therapy. That guy at the laundrymat was probably just smiling because he knew that someone was going to be in trouble (your husband).

That cab driver probably didn't mean any harm, either. It's men's nature to look at women...especially pretty ones but most are harmless.

We're all here for ya so hang in there!