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Old 07-18-2008, 12:58 AM   #1
Sassysmama
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Question My Mother took my SSI money for herself

Ok, I have Cystic Fibrosis. When I was 12 yrs old, my Mother received $42,000 in SSI money for me, for backpay. She was not living with me and I was being raised by my Grandparents. My Mother took the money, bought herself a house. Then moved my 2 younger sisters into the house along with her current boyfriend (their father). She never even asked me or my older sister to live with her. I lived with my Grandparents from a year old up to 27 yrs old. Is there a way I can go after my Mother for this money? She's been terrible my whole entire life, so I really don't feel bad about suing her if I can. Thanks!
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Old 07-18-2008, 03:02 AM   #2
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Oh yes you can go after your mother, those are your checks, she will probably end up going to jail for awhile.. That's a felony!
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Old 07-18-2008, 03:37 AM   #3
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Not sure what the statute of limitations is on something like that. The fact that you were a minor may play into it, however, since she is you mother, it may not be considered a crime. This is one for a qualified lawyer to answer.

Morally however, she should have used the money to help you, not herself. Sorry you had this happen to you!!!
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Old 07-18-2008, 04:04 AM   #4
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Sorry this happened to you. Maybe that money could have been used to help you instead of herself. Definitely check with a lawyer.
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Old 07-18-2008, 07:01 AM   #5
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What a horrible thing for a mother to do. I doubt if you can do anything since it was so many years ago. Contact your SS office and ask them. Good luck! Can I ask how you are doing now? My niece passed away from CF at age 16 back in '97. I understand they've made a lot of progress in fighting it since then.
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Old 07-18-2008, 07:03 AM   #6
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Originally Posted by Marilyn View Post
Not sure what the statute of limitations is on something like that. The fact that you were a minor may play into it, however, since she is you mother, it may not be considered a crime. This is one for a qualified lawyer to answer.

Morally however, she should have used the money to help you, not herself. Sorry you had this happen to you!!!

Because I am on SS disability I get a small amount of money for my minor children. Let me tell you, they are very strict about how you have to spend that money ON THE CHILDREN. It probably wouldn't have been illeagle for her to buy a house with the money IF you lived in the house also. But, since you've never lived there she definetely broke the law. It just may have been too many years ago to do anything about it. But, like I said before, it's worth a phone call to SS to find out.
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Old 07-18-2008, 07:41 AM   #7
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Man, THis brings back lots of memories for me. Not good ones either. My mother use to make me sign over my SS checks when I was your age. I was living with her at the time and I guess it was used to help take care of me for a while. When I wsa 16 and 17 I had to open an account at a local clothing store to buy my clothes. I had a job and began paying for my own clothes and anything else that I needed including doctor bills and car repairs. (By the time I got out of high school I had 2 jobs.( She made me do this till I was 18. Then of course the checks stopped. My mother had a BF and I knew for a fact that my checks were not being used to help me. I neve did anything about it altho I wish I did. I simply cut my ties with her. I haven't spoken to her in 11 years. So believe it or not I know EXACTLY how you feel. I think that since you weren't living with her you have a good chance of recovering some of your money. Good Luck and Take Care!!
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Old 07-18-2008, 08:22 AM   #8
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I'm sorry this has happened to you. If anything your grandparents are entititled to go after you mother for the SSI money. SSI is to be used for the care of minor receiving the benefits and if my memory serves me well, your mother would have had to fill out a yearly statement showing what she spent the money on. Another words your care. I'm not sure about statue of limitations as I live in NJ but it is federal so I do not think where you lives matters. I would seek out the advice of an attorney. The SSI money should have been going directly to your grandparents on your behalf since they were the people raising you. Were you under their "LEGAL" custody or was it an informal living situation? Elaine
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Old 07-18-2008, 06:08 PM   #9
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I to am so sorry to read this. It breaks my heart to hear that mothers can actually do this stuff to their own children. I to feel you should get in touch with SS and address this to them, you may need legal advice. Good luck to you, always remember what goes around comes around. Your mother is not a decent woman...

Let us know how you make out and welcome to 4wt
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Old 07-18-2008, 07:59 PM   #10
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If your mother was your rep payee at the time, legally she has to be able to demonstrate how the money was spent for your needs. (I've been the rep payee for a couple of disabled individuals). If she cannot show that the money went for your needs, she is accountable to pay the money back.
I'm not sure what the time limit is though.
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Old 07-20-2008, 09:20 AM   #11
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Originally Posted by jrsygal37 View Post
I'm sorry this has happened to you. If anything your grandparents are entititled to go after you mother for the SSI money. SSI is to be used for the care of minor receiving the benefits and if my memory serves me well, your mother would have had to fill out a yearly statement showing what she spent the money on. Another words your care. I'm not sure about statue of limitations as I live in NJ but it is federal so I do not think where you lives matters. I would seek out the advice of an attorney. The SSI money should have been going directly to your grandparents on your behalf since they were the people raising you. Were you under their "LEGAL" custody or was it an informal living situation? Elaine
My Grandmother tried to get my Mother to sign over legal custody of me and she wouldn't do it. I was raised by my Grandparents. After my Mother let the house SSI bought go to repo, those 2 kids were raised by their Grandparents...nice huh?
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Old 07-20-2008, 09:23 AM   #12
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I to am so sorry to read this. It breaks my heart to hear that mothers can actually do this stuff to their own children. I to feel you should get in touch with SS and address this to them, you may need legal advice. Good luck to you, always remember what goes around comes around. Your mother is not a decent woman...

Let us know how you make out and welcome to 4wt
Thanks for all the support! I know it's going to be a long road. Im sure my family is all gonna come down on me for this, but my Mother did a very bad thing.

I did contact a local attorney's office that specializes in SSI stuff. Im waiting to hear back from them. My Mother works for a lawyer's office too but they specialize in Worker's Comp.
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Old 07-20-2008, 09:26 AM   #13
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What a horrible thing for a mother to do. I doubt if you can do anything since it was so many years ago. Contact your SS office and ask them. Good luck! Can I ask how you are doing now? My niece passed away from CF at age 16 back in '97. I understand they've made a lot of progress in fighting it since then.
Im sorry to hear about your niece. Fortunately, things have improved with fighting CF. I have to do 4 aerosol meds 2x a day along with a vest I wear that kinda shakes me up to get the mucus out. Im doing good though. You pretty much have to been your own doctor in this situation.
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Old 07-20-2008, 08:11 PM   #14
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I have to agree with everyone else on this in that I think that you need to contact a lawyer. Make sure that you're really sure that you want to do this because like you said, you're family is going to be upset over this. Good luck!!
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Old 07-21-2008, 05:18 AM   #15
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Originally Posted by Sassysmama View Post
Im sorry to hear about your niece. Fortunately, things have improved with fighting CF. I have to do 4 aerosol meds 2x a day along with a vest I wear that kinda shakes me up to get the mucus out. Im doing good though. You pretty much have to been your own doctor in this situation.

I'm so glad you are doing well! I actually met the man who invented that vest! When Lisa was a baby we used to have to literally turn her in all different directions and "pound" on her with a cupped hand. Then her grandfather (my sil's dad) came up with this huge rubber suction cup looking thing that was attached to a thing that would move it up and down and we used that. I was very close to Lisa and the only other person, besides her parents, who knew how to do her treatments. When she was born the outlook for CF was so dismal and now I just saw something the other day that called it a "potentially" fatal disease. It is wonderful to see the advances that have been made. Now we just need to wait for them to come up with a cure.I pray that you continue to have good health.
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