Some Maxine jokesMaxine on Driver Safety -- "I can't use the cell phone in the car. M

[judy]

Maxine on Driver Safety -- "I can't use the cell phone in the car.
I have to keep my hands free for making gestures."

Maxine on Lawn Care -- "The key to a nice-looking lawn is a good mower. I recommend one who is muscular and shirtless."

Maxine on The Perfect Man -- "All I'm looking for is a guy who'll do what I want, when I want, for as long as I want, and then go away."



Maxine on Aging-- "Take every birthday with a grain of salt. This works much better if the salt accompanies a Margarita."

"The only two things we do with greater frequency past middle
age are urinate and attend funerals."

"The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket."


"To err is human; to forgive, highly unlikely."

"Do you realize in about 40 years we'll have millions of old ladies running around with tattoos and pierced navels?" (Now that's scary!)

"Money can't buy happiness --but somehow it's more comfortable to cry in a Porsche than a Kia."