Prayers for my girls please

[lynne b]

I know i haven't been active on here for awhile, not even sure if i have a right to ask or not, but would apperciate some prayers for my girls.

Their father killed him self last Thursday, yes he had, had some personal problems for the past couple of years. Both the girls have been beside him through everything trying to help him through it, in fact my youngest had spent the better part of the day with him on Thursday and then had to leave him to go get her girls, she felt something wasn't right and even asked him if he was ok, he told her he was fine and he was going to mow the yard, Amy tried calling him shortly after to check on him and got no answer and just thought he was mowing, his wife got home around 4:00 and found him in the barn, it had only been about 1 1/2 hrs since Amy had left him, needless to say Amy is blaming herself, and no matter what anyone says she can't get past that she left him alone, I know it will take time and counseling for her to realize it was not her fault.

My oldest daughter feels that she let her dad down also, she thinks of herself as the fixer for anything that goes on in the family, lord knows she has been my right arm when it comes to mom and feels offended if i try to take some of the load off of her. Needless to say both girls are devastated, death is hard enough to deal with but i think suicide is the worst leaveing everyone with questions of why and if only we had done this.

We were married for 11yrs and after the girls became adults we put our differences aside and got alone great with him and his wife now. I am trying to deal with the girls and then i come home and deal with my own emotions of the pain that the girls are feeling and the anger that he has left the girls to go through this.
We have had the last 2 days to kind of get the girls calmed down somewhat, today is the viewing and tomorrow is the funeral, i talked with the girls this morning and i can feel the emotions building again so it is going to be another rough couple of days for them. I know it will take a long time for them to come to terms with this, it's hard enough for the girls to deal with but there is also the g-kids to deal with....HOW do you make them understand something that you don't even understand yourself.

So if you could please just say a prayer for my girls and g-kids i would apperciate it so much, they have been through so much in their young adult lives.
Thank you Lynne


wasn't sure where to post this, was kind of venting also.