Working out friendships

[judy]

Since I retired, I don't get to see the friends I worked with too often. They're working, and busy on the weekends with their chores, families, etc. I made up my mind to try my hardest to maintain relationships with the people I really care about, whatever their immediate response.

For example, one friend has had an upgrade in her responsibilities at work, just became a grandmother, takes care of her elderly mother, her husband and difficult son. I invited her and 2 other friends out for my 60th birthday, but only 1 from that group could make it. This friend claimed financial issues and the other one was busy that night. I love them both, and there's always more to the story than meets the eye, but I decided not to take it personally and will continue to try to get together with them.

I'm seeing the friend who went to dinner with me tonight. I'd love to just pick her up from work and go out for a cup of coffee and visit for a couple of hours. She's just not that way. So - I'm going to her house, I have to stay for dinner with her husband and father, she called me twice about the menu, etc., etc. It's a good thing I love her, because this is a lot of work!

The funny part of it is that I can't eat. I'm going through major dental work and really can't eat out. I have a temporary, kind of delicate, removable bridge so I eat at home where I can remove it and not worry about it breaking. It's not a big deal at all. She knows this too, but can't seem to not be the hostess of the year.

I'm exhausted already!