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Old 09-25-2006, 03:52 PM   #1
pink love
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Unhappy I am scared.

I am scared of men between the ages of 20 and 50. Let me back up. Today we were at the laundromat, and this guy was watching me the entire time. Then, when we goy our clothes out of the drier, I noticed that one of the shirts bled all over the other clothes, and I got mad at my husband because he had separated them, and I said his name and last name out loud without even noticing. The creepy guy was right there and he had a smile on his face. Now, I am paranoid because I think he will track us down or something.
Afterwards we came home and were smoking a cigarette outside when a cab showed up. The cab driver kept looking at me while he was waiting for his customer to come out.
I am sooo scared that someone will break into our house and rape me or otherwise hurt me. I realize that it is not rational for me to fear every creepy man that looks at me, but I was abused when I was a child and teenager, so I practically get paralized with fear everytime something like this happens. I cannot shake the feeling off. I had my husband install 4 different locks/bolts on each door so I could sleep better at night.
I just started seeing a therapist, but I cannot contact her every time I have these little crises. I needed to talk to someone, because sometimes just getting it out helps. Anyhow, thanks for listening.
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