Doggie Humor

[katcarasella]

Why It Costs More to get your Dog Groomed than it does to get your hair done.

10. Your hairdresser doesn't wash and clean your rear end.

9. You don't go for eight weeks without washing or brushing your hair.

8. Your hairdresser doesn't have to give you a sanitary trim.

7. Your hairdresser doesn't have to clean your ears.

6. Your hairdresser doesn't have to remove the boogies from your eyes.

5. You sit still for your hairdresser.

4. Your haircut doesn't include a manicure or pedicure.

3. Your hairdresser only washes and cuts the hair on your head.

2. You don't bite or scratch your hairdresser.

and the #1 reason why your Dog's haircut costs more than yours :

1. The likelihood of you pooping or peeing while your hair is being cut is slim!

A Dog's Eyeview of Obedience Class

HEEL ON LEAD: Walk as slowly as you can, then spring forward with all your weight. If your handler falls flat on his or her face, you score 25 points.

RECALL: When your handler shouts at you, assume rock deafness. On no account sit in front of your handler, because he will only make you heel. 25 points if your handler loses his voice.

RETRIEVE the DUMBBELL: On no account fetch it back, because he will only throw it away again. If he wants the stupid piece of wood let him fetch it himself, you will be helping to train him not to throw away things he really wants. 5 points every time the handler gets the dumbbell.

SIT: Stay one inch away from the ground at the back end. This builds muscles and makes your rear legs stronger, which will help you pull your handler down on the HEEL ON LEAD