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Old 06-09-2011, 05:28 AM   #1
judy
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Sounds like your brother was being defensive when Rick spoke up for you. Personally, I think your brother needed to be told that you need a weekend off.

The tension there sounds like it is getting to be too much. Maybe it is time for a lunch alone with your brother, and a good serious talk. He and his wife do help some. Maybe they don't want to hear how much of a toll it is taking on you. People become reliant on anyone they can when they are faced with an unpleasant job.

Your younger brother sounds like he's not going to be helpful no matter what.
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Old 06-09-2011, 08:26 AM   #2
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He meant well and I'm sure he was very frustrated by then. With your bro honking the horn and all.
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Old 06-09-2011, 10:33 AM   #3
DianaB
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I"m so proud of Rick for standing up for you!!!! I'm also glad that he walked away and didn't start a big fight over it.

I think that you should schedule each family for a weekend or maybe a whole Saturday to stay with your Mom. Then it's up to all of you to either sit with your Mom or make sure a family member is with her.....which could include your neices and nephews. It should be a family project to take care of your Mom. You should have some time to yourself.....to go to town or visit others. You're going to have to let them know that you need a break.....not just physically but mentally as well!!!!!
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Old 06-09-2011, 01:22 PM   #4
gja1000
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Diana! That is an excellent idea!! Have everyone schedule "their" weekend day. Here is the calendar, here are the weekend days, now choose your days? Let them decide and you won't be whining or asking for help.

Make it clear that like Diana said, they don't have to be there, it could be another family member, or it could be a paid sitter - BUT - that person is responsible for being sure someone is with mom for that day.

This way, you don't have to ask for respite (that's what it is called by the way, caregiving respite, and caregivers don't get nearly enough of it).

Diana! You are soooo smart!!!
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Old 06-09-2011, 04:07 PM   #5
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Thank you, Gayle!! However, I think that you helped to make it even better!!!

Janet, I do think that this would be a good idea. I never thought about them HIRING someone to come and help but this could really be a family responsibility!!! I hope it works out for you!!!
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Old 06-09-2011, 05:37 PM   #6
Janet
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Part of the problem is solved....I'll start another thread.
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Old 06-09-2011, 05:54 PM   #7
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Yes Janet, I'm dying to know what happened!!!!!
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