Need a change.....

[Marilyn]

I want to quit my job. I've reached that point in my career where I'm making what I always dreamed of. My job is not hard. It's actually fun a lot of the time. I realize now that making it fun is all up to me, and my attitude. But, I just don't really want to do it anymore. I'd really like to be more independent, help my hubby with his business, spend more time around the house organizing and getting things just the way I want them. (Sure am using I a lot here.)

Part of my attitude is that we have new owners, and they took away some of our vacation benefits, and I have to work 3 more years to get part of the vacation back. It's taken some of the wind out of my sails. (I'm in sales, sorry for the pun.)

I want to do so many things, and feel like I'm stuck with an 8 to 5 (7:15 to 5:45 with my commute). It's dark when I get home.

I know it would stupid to quit, my 401K is growing nicely, but we have to dream.....

[Tink]

Marilyn, I understand all too well.
I was where you're at almost a yr ago.
While my situation was different, the longing to have more time to do my own thing was very strong and that's what I'm reading from you.

We only get one chance to live. Once that's gone there is no turning back. There is no perfect solution... only "best" ones. Will you be financially disadvantaged if you were to quit now? Will the difference in your 401K make a real difference in your quality of life at retirement? If not.... then what are you doing it for?

My Dad retired at 64... after many years of back and joint problems and still when he retired he felt guilty... as if he really should have kept working longer. His first Soc Sec and retirement account checks arrived the day after his funeral. He died suddenly of a massive heart attack and never got to enjoy his retirement or collect on any of the money he'd worked so hard to put away.

Had we known, we would have encouraged him to retire sooner. But we can't know. Sometimes you DO have to start thinking about yourself... and what better time than while you're still able to enjoy it? Now that your nest is empty you are entitled to be focusing differently. So many years you've lived for and devoted yourself to others... if your turn is to come, you need to choose it.

Whatever you decide to do, you know we will all stand beside you and celebrate it with you. Just try to decide based on the reality of the situation rather than a false sense of obligation. You're a smart lady... you'll make the right choice at the right time.

[Janet]

What a great response Tink. You said all my thoughts so beautifully.

[highlans]

Yes Tink has said it all.
Is money everthing mmm, my dad retired at 63 and a week later had a stroke. We had been pestering him to retire at 60 but he said a few extra years will help his pension, my mother is not in good health either so what did those extra years achieve nothing they are both to frail to enjoy life to the full.
I was made redundant 4 years ago and now stay home looking after my grandaughter yes we have to go without some things but I am enjoying life and that is more important I think than having a good pension fund.
Look after today as tomorrow may never come.

[judy]

You'll know when to go. I knew when my passion for teaching and how much I was putting into giving my kids were becoming "used up." I quickly made my plans, figured out monetary things, and left a year later. I only stayed the extra year was because we had gotten a large raise and I wanted that to count in my pension.

Money matters, but there comes a moment when you know the balanced between needing your freedom and having enough money has arrived.

[DianaB]

I think that Tink said it all pretty well too. I've never worked out of the home more than a few months at a time (mostly to help someone out for awhile) and I know that if I would have worked our finances would have been better but my husband makes a good living and while we don't necessarily buy all the lastest gadgets or drive the newest car being home has been very fulfilling for me. It's nice to be able to go with my husband out of town at the last minute or have the kids over and not be tired from working a job all day. Give it a lot of prayer (which I'm sure you'll do) and I'm sure that you'll decide when the time is right for you to stay home or cut back. Good luck!

[Marilyn]

Thank you all for your thoughtful comments. You are all amazing. It's so hard to know just what is the right thing to do. Hubby and I have been talking about it. This week has been especially stressful with home and work demands pulling from each direction and little time for rest or even sleep. We've decided that when this weekend is past, we will sit down and work out a 5 year plan, and decide just how much savings is enough, where he wants his business to be, and when each of us can either retire or make a change. One option is for me to work part time for him. If I can increase his business, without working full time, which we believe I can, it could be a good transition and he would sure appreciate the help. I do bits and pieces for him now.

My biggest problem right now is the 8 to 5 lack of freedom, especially now with the loss of vacation. If I need to stay home and clean bacause we have weekend plans, I can't. If I want to go on a mission trip, I can't, spend a week as a councelor or cook at camp, I can't. That's what is making me so unhappy. I like my work, it's just after so many years, it's becoming a real restriction on my life.

Can you see, it's becoming time to make a change. I keep thinking two more years.... Hubby and I will be praying about it and discussing our options.

Thank you again for listening. I know my posts get lengthy.

[judy]

You really sound like you are where I was when I made my decision to retire. I'll pray for the best possible outcome for you both.

And your posts are never too long! I love your intelligence and thoughtfulness.

[DianaB]

I truly believe that if you're praying about retiring then you'll have a peace about doing it and everything will fall in place for you to do it. When you're in God's will He smoothes a path ahead of you.

[Janet]

Please don't ever feel your posts are too long. I love reading your posts. Your thoughts, wisdom and compassion is present in each one. I miss you when you don't have as much time to post.

[Marilyn]

Awwww, ladies, thank you sooooo much. I have tears in my eyes right now. I love you all and feel so blessed to have such a wonderful circle on friends. I have several close friends here, but with our busy lives, we see each other at church or a bible study, but we don't have the daily interaction that we do here. It's different, and so wonderful to have both kinds of friends.

You are all so very special. Have an awesome day!!!!!