sexless relationships

[pope1982]

Originally Posted by teri88

Haley, hon, please don't take this wrong....ummmm, how to say this without hurting your feelings? I just saw where you mentioned in another post that Micah sleeps with you. Now, I was famous for letting my kids come to bed with me when they were sick or scared or whatever. But, how can you expect a normal healthy relationship with your hubby if you have Micah in your bed? Children are a wonderful, fabulous blessing. But you can not allow your son to be first in your life, that position rightfully belongs to your husband. No wonder you are so exaughsted all of the time, neither you or Micah will get a good night's sleep while he's in your bed. I babysat for a woman who was always so tired and I felt so sorry for her. She kept telling me how Samantha was up 2 or 3 times a night at a year old. Then, one day she mentioned that Sam slept in the bed with them. I told her that Sam wasn't keeping her up, she was keeping Sam up. She finally bit the bullet and put her in her own room. It was really hard at first, both Sam and she cried themselves to sleep for a week. But finally Sam got used to being in her own room and the change in their lives was amazing.

I am not criticzing you, I'm really not. Sometimes it's hard to be objective when you are in the middle of a situation. I think your husband sounds very immature, but I can also see his problem. He is thinking acting like a baby will get your attention (he may not even realize he's thinking this) because it works for Micah. Stupid? Yup, but I'll bet that is a lot of what's going on with him.

I'd really encourage the two of you to get counseling. If you don't want to do it for yourself, do it for Micah because if you guys are happy, he will be too.

ok, enouch out of me! Sorry I'm on my soapbox.

I was just giving my younger sister similar advice on the same subject the other night, sounds as if you and your husband are just as stubborn as she and her fiance. She is very aggressive and in your face, to the point of being a nag and he runs away. But more importantly, they both HAVE to be right and point fingers in the other direction.

You all need to take a step back and own your roles in this war. Learn the delicate balance. Why would you want to live daily hurting the person you love most?

It's not worth it. Gotta pick your battles and learn to let some things slide.

I am sure he was always the same man from the day you fell in love with him, your annoyance with him is only emphasizing the less desirable traits. Knock it off lol You know who you married.