Had a great night :)

[Lindsey]

Isn't it great how good friends can make you feel? Last night I was supposed to have a date with Kyle, and my friend Dan also invited me to go out for drinks to celebrate my raise. Well, Kyle was in a bad mood so he cancelled the date so that he wouldn't end up putting me in a bad mood too. So I decided I might as well take Dan up on his offer!
Now Dan and I met when we were in the same engineering classes in university. I left to go to tech school, and he's still in his last year of his degree. But we kept in touch the whole time. For a few months we tried being more than friends but it just didn't work out between us. For sanity purposes, Kyle doesn't know that. The past is the past, we're friends and that's it, so what he doesn't know can't hurt him, right?
So we met for drinks and I was a little concerned it would be a little awkward because we haven't seen each other in awhile, but it wasn't at ALL. We just talked and talked and talked about his relationships, my relationships, our friends, our pets, our families, everything! Then it was getting pretty crowded in the lounge so he asked if I just wanted to go watch a movie at his place. So I went over there and we put in a movie and didn't even watch it... just talked and talked and talked some more. We were reliving all our days back in our classes together, and what ever happened to the other people we hung out with, and all the professors we had and on and on and on. He asked what time it was and I checked... oh my gosh it was 1 in the morning!!! So I put on my boots to leave, and he gave me a big hug and said we need to hang out more.
I have totally missed hanging out with him. It was just like going back to old times. I really need to start building up my own circle of friends again!

[Lindsey]

... and again with the drama. Kyle is none too happy about me hanging out with Dan last night. I did tell Kyle that if I wasn't going out with him, then I'd probably be going out with friends anyway. But apparently Dan should have been off-limits. Ugh, it's so frustrating. I wasn't doing anything wrong, so I'm not too worried about it.

[Janet]

If there is no ring on your finger, if the two of you (Kyle and you) have not discussed your relationship being exclusive and committed then Kyle needs to get over it. Another way to look at it Lindsey, how would you HONESTLY feel if Kyle did the same thing and YOU didn't know he tried having a relationship with the 'friend.'

Just trying to help, but I'm glad you had a great time. I love getting together with people I haven't seen in ages and reliving some of the memories. Oh the good ole days...LOL.

[Lindsey]

We are exclusive, but Dan and I were just hanging out as friends. Kyle would see it completely differently if I went out for drinks with a girl. He wouldn't care at all. I wouldn't cheat on Kyle, I just like having my own friends. I guess I'm just sick of constantly feeling like Kyle is judging me and constantly thinks I'm cheating on him, when in a year and a half I have NEVER done anything to make him think that. I have a long-term boyfriend, and Dan has been seeing a few girls on and off... Nothing was going to happen with us.
I know all the girls that Kyle has dated, and I know that he sees them sometimes, and I even know that at least one has tried getting back with him when I'm not around. It doesn't bother me, I know he's not going to go for it. But he's totally different. He freaks out when I talk to a guy I dated years ago. And so he's pretty much been cut from my life, even though we were really close friends too. He's a jealous guy. So I think out of the 5 years that Dan and I have been good friends, those few months of confusion shouldn't really be important at all, and even that was over 3 years ago! We never exclusively dated or anything. I just know Kyle would blow it way out of proportion and I wouldn't be allowed to talk to Dan anymore.
But I'm just going to keep doing what I want to do. I'm going to keep the friends I want to keep. It's my life, and I still don't thnk I was doing anything wrong.
I think my Kyle posts always get a little out of hand lol, I think it's something I should keep to myself until I figure out what's really going on with us

[Lindsey]

okay he's over it. I was worried that "old Kyle" was coming back when he was upset this morning, but I think "new Kyle" has taken over. He just called me in a great mood and we're going to hang out tonight

[Gina]

ohhhhhhh to be young again and have such problems lol

[Janet]

No way Gina!!! I wouldn't go back to that age for all the money in the world!!!..

[celstu1]

Im not much older but Id never go back to that age either! aaahh I love the security of self that comes with maturity! I stopped being jealous YEARS ago and its because I think Im a GREAT catch! (not to sound cocky, cuz Im really not cocky!) If a guy wants to cheat on me, its totally his loss. So I really don't have a jealous bone in me. It feels soo good to have gotten to a point where Im mentally secure of who I am and what I have to offer! woohoo Also to date guys mature enough to not be jealous over petty things like that as well. Nothing turns me off about a guy as much as jealousy. Its such an ugly trait. I won't be controlled and miss experiences over a guys jealousy!

Lindsay - good for you for keeping the friends you want and doing what you want. Hanging out with Dan as a friend is not disrespectful. You could tell Kyle EVERYTHING you did last night without feeling shame or guilt. The only time you might be doing something wrong is when you cannot tell your partner, then you might think of how you would feel if the roles were reversed. ya know? I'm also glad to hear you are going to rebuild back up your circle of friends again! Its so important to have some good friends.

[Janet]

Originally Posted by celstu1

Im not much older but Id never go back to that age either! aaahh I love the security of self that comes with maturity! I stopped being jealous YEARS ago and its because I think Im a GREAT catch! (not to sound cocky, cuz Im really not cocky!) If a guy wants to cheat on me, its totally his loss. So I really don't have a jealous bone in me. It feels soo good to have gotten to a point where Im mentally secure of who I am and what I have to offer! woohoo Also to date guys mature enough to not be jealous over petty things like that as well. Nothing turns me off about a guy as much as jealousy. Its such an ugly trait. I won't be controlled and miss experiences over a guys jealousy!

Lindsay - good for you for keeping the friends you want and doing what you want. Hanging out with Dan as a friend is not disrespectful. You could tell Kyle EVERYTHING you did last night without feeling shame or guilt. The only time you might be doing something wrong is when you cannot tell your partner, then you might think of how you would feel if the roles were reversed. ya know? I'm also glad to hear you are going to rebuild back up your circle of friends again! Its so important to have some good friends.

I really like your way of thinking!!

[celstu1]

Originally Posted by Janet

I really like your way of thinking!!

Some may say Im cynical! LOL

I've been burnt badly... put 10 years of my life into a guy who walked away and left me to sell our house, cancel our wedding, took the ring. I realized that 10 years with someone does not mean a lifetime and a ring does not mean a promise of marriage and forever. Any experience that I didn't get because I was with him is MY loss solely. He doesn't care. He held me back and then when he wanted out he left and I had to clean up the mess that I was. So now I do what I want, when I want, with who I want and don't look back. Im a good trustworthy, honest person. Any guy dating me has to be able to trust me and not control me, which means no jealousy! In return he gets his freedom to do as he pleases without me breathing down his throat.

[HALEY]

If i were you, i would dump kyle and start dating Dan, if you can talk that easily with him all night long girl, i would hold on to that one and not let him go !!!

[Lindsey]

Originally Posted by HALEY

If i were you, i would dump kyle and start dating Dan, if you can talk that easily with him all night long girl, i would hold on to that one and not let him go !!!

Oh I couldn't let myself do that! Dan is not a one-girl kinda guy. I found that out when we tried having something a few years ago, and it wasn't long before he started ignoring me for a new flavor-of-the-week. I think we'll work better just being friends!

[HALEY]

Originally Posted by Lindsey

Oh I couldn't let myself do that! Dan is not a one-girl kinda guy. I found that out when we tried having something a few years ago, and it wasn't long before he started ignoring me for a new flavor-of-the-week. I think we'll work better just being friends!

aww Lindsey, he sounded nice, some guys just don't listen to woman when we talk he sounded like a good listener,,, oh well i tried....