Ladies, I aked the Man, but what do you thinK?

[Taurus Babe]

Okay [Ladies], help me understand this.
Recently my bf's step mother told him he could come by and have a look through all his step mothers furniture and see what he would like to have. (His stepmother is moving into a old folks home, she's not 'passed').

Well, isn't picking out furniture something a couple should do together???? At first I thought he didn't invite me because I was working and it was his only free time to go over and do it, but he's put it off all week and now he's going to do it tomorrow morning, and I'm free!!!...not working I've dropped serveral ::hints:: that I'm very interesting in seeing what there is, and I've even said that we could use serveral new things and kinda given him a mental list.

Oh an none of this helps since we've seen each other about 5 hours in the last 3 days cause of our opposite schedules...not even at night.

[Ladies], what's up with this? What's going on in his head???

[Marilyn]

Trying to tread softly here....if he's your bf and not your hubby, perhaps she is not comfortable with your relationship. She wants to make sure he gets what he wants since your relationship may not be permanent. Just thinking out loud, but that could be her reasoning. Now why your bf is not telling her that his is bringing you along is something you may want to ask him. If he is thinking of a long term future with you, it seems he would be excited to include you.

[Taurus Babe]

thanks for the reply. we (me and the step mother) get along great. she shouldn't feel threatened by me cause obviously if we didn't stay together, it would be his furniture. I think it's more, my bf not inviting me though. I just don't understand why he wouldn't want me to come. especially since we've spent barely any time together the past few days and tomorrow we both have the day off!

[Marilyn]

Since you do get along well, it does seem strange that he has not invited you. Maybe he just doesn't realize that you would want to go & does not realize the significance that you place on this. He may think that you've been working hard and doesn't want to have you do, what to him may appear to be a chore, on your day off. Hope this all works out for you.

[RLC12345678]

I agree with Marilyn. He probably just doesn't know you want to go. The key to any relationship is communication. You cannot get mad at him for not taking you along if you don't expressly tell him that you want to go. Men think WAY differently than women. They in no way, shape, or form can read minds. You have to specifically spell things out for them. I think that he just doesn't know that you want to go or the significane you've placed on the situation. IMO, you need to just talk to him and tell him you want to go.

[AngieDoogles]

I agree with the others. Men just don't get subtle hints 99% of the time. They just don't know how we women think. lol

Good luck!

[Mandy]

I agree with the above. Tell him what you want, be straight with him. Good luck

[Chandra Amaya]

I agree as well. I actually got upset with my hubby for not getting my "hints" once. He told me I have to come right out & say it. He (nor any man I know) is good at getting hints. Be completely straight with him & tell him you would like to go & explain what it means to you. Good luck.

[Janet]

Maybe this will be a very emotional time for him considering it's his mothers furniture. I would want to be alone with my thoughts considering each piece. Some may have some special memories.

I hate to say this, because it sounds so selfish, but if I wanted something that meant a lot to me, but not my husband, too bad. It would be coming home with me. There are some things my husband brought home from his parents after their passing and even though I wasn't thrilled with some of it, I found an out of the way place for it because it meant so much to him.

[RLC12345678]

Originally Posted by Janet

Maybe this will be a very emotional time for him considering it's his mothers furniture. I would want to be alone with my thoughts considering each piece. Some may have some special memories.

I hate to say this, because it sounds so selfish, but if I wanted something that meant a lot to me, but not my husband, too bad. It would be coming home with me. There are some things my husband brought home from his parents after their passing and even though I wasn't thrilled with some of it, I found an out of the way place for it because it meant so much to him.

I agree, Janet. My hubby has some hideous furniture from his grandfather that is passed but I keep it just because it is sentimenal to him.

[DianaB]

Originally Posted by Janet

There are some things my husband brought home from his parents after their passing and even though I wasn't thrilled with some of it, I found an out of the way place for it because it meant so much to him.

Janet, that was very thoughtful and sweet of you.