Dead Duck

Dobie · 05-03-2008, 08:52 AM

A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinarian.
As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out
his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest.
After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly
and said, "I'm so sorry, your pet has passed away."

The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure?"
"Yes," the vet said, "I'm sure. The duck is dead."
"How can you be so sure", she protested. "I mean, you
haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might
just be in a coma or something."

The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the
room. He returned a few moments later with a black
Labrador Retriever.
As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog
stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the
examination table and sniffed the duck from top to
bottom. He then looked at the vet with sad eyes and
shook his head.

The vet patted the dog and took it out and returned a
few moments later with a beautiful cat. The cat jumped
up on the table and also sniffed the bird from its
beak to its tail and back again. The cat sat back on
its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly, jumped
down and strolled out of the room.

The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but
as I said, this is, most definitely, 100% certifiably,
a dead duck." Then the vet turned to his computer
terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he
handed to the woman.

The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill.
"$150!" she cried. "$150 just to tell me my duck is
dead?!" The vet shrugged. "I'm sorry. If you'd taken
my word for it, the bill would have been $20. But what
with the Lab Report and the Cat
Scan, it all adds up."

DianaB · 05-03-2008, 11:32 AM

That was a really funny one!!! Thanks!!!!

Janet · 05-03-2008, 11:33 AM

I had heard this but forgotten the ending. It was so funny...sometimes I think Vets really do this...LOL

AngieDoogles · 05-03-2008, 01:59 PM

LOL! Very cute. I know first hand how expensive those "Cat scans" are...

goofywife · 05-03-2008, 02:10 PM

That was cute!

judy · 05-03-2008, 02:56 PM

very funny!

Janet · 05-03-2008, 05:09 PM

I'm just posting again so it doesn't keep coming up when I hit new posts...LOL

katcarasella · 05-03-2008, 06:00 PM

Good one Dobie, very funny,,,,

Chandra Amaya · 05-06-2008, 06:15 PM

that is great!

DianaB · 05-07-2008, 09:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Janet

I'm just posting again so it doesn't keep coming up when I hit new posts...LOL

Hey Janet!!! Did this come up again in your new posts?!!

AngieDoogles · 05-07-2008, 09:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DianaB

Hey Janet!!! Did this come up again in your new posts?!!

LOL, let's keep it on top!

So how are you today Diana?

DianaB · 05-07-2008, 12:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AngieDoogles

LOL, let's keep it on top!

So how are you today Diana?

I'm feeling ornery but I've got to get my house cleaned! We're having a house-full of company this weekend. I guess that the orneriness will just have to wait!!!!

Janet · 05-07-2008, 01:28 PM

Aren't you two just hilarious!!!

Chandra Amaya · 05-07-2008, 01:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Janet

Aren't you two just hilarious!!!

actually they have a pretty good idea. Is it on top again?

Janet · 05-07-2008, 03:28 PM

It was...LOL

05-03-2008, 08:52 AM	#1
Dobie Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: New Hampshire Posts: 1,075	Dead Duck A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinarian. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and said, "I'm so sorry, your pet has passed away." The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure?" "Yes," the vet said, "I'm sure. The duck is dead." "How can you be so sure", she protested. "I mean, you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something." The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few moments later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head. The vet patted the dog and took it out and returned a few moments later with a beautiful cat. The cat jumped up on the table and also sniffed the bird from its beak to its tail and back again. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly, jumped down and strolled out of the room. The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is, most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck." Then the vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman. The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$150!" she cried. "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead?!" The vet shrugged. "I'm sorry. If you'd taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20. But what with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it all adds up."

05-03-2008, 11:32 AM	#2
DianaB Moderator Donating 4WT 13K Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Kansas Posts: 16,069	That was a really funny one!!! Thanks!!!! __________________ ´¨) ¸.•´¸.•´¨) ¸.•*¨) (¸.•´ (¸.•` ¤ Diana Baker ✞ You and I are friends....... Always remember that if you fall I will pick you up...... After I stop laughing!!!

05-03-2008, 11:33 AM	#3
Janet Moderator Donating 4WT 18K Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: INDIANA Posts: 21,624	I had heard this but forgotten the ending. It was so funny...sometimes I think Vets really do this...LOL __________________ To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven. ECCLESIASTES 3:1

05-03-2008, 01:59 PM	#4
AngieDoogles Donating 4WT 4000 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 6,509	LOL! Very cute. I know first hand how expensive those "Cat scans" are... __________________ "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." ~MT

05-03-2008, 02:10 PM	#5
goofywife Donating 4WT Yakker Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Oklahoma Posts: 855	That was cute! __________________ Michelle (Katys mom) OK Yorkie Rescue-Another Chance at Love

05-03-2008, 02:56 PM	#6
judy Donating 4WT Yakker Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Denver, NY Posts: 8,097	very funny! __________________ *Judy*

05-03-2008, 05:09 PM	#7
Janet Moderator Donating 4WT 18K Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: INDIANA Posts: 21,624	I'm just posting again so it doesn't keep coming up when I hit new posts...LOL __________________ To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven. ECCLESIASTES 3:1

05-03-2008, 06:00 PM	#8
katcarasella KAT'S KRAZY KORNER Donating Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Chicago Posts: 3,031	Good one Dobie, very funny,,,, __________________ A friend accepts us as we are yet helps us to be what we should. Kat

05-06-2008, 06:15 PM	#9
Chandra Amaya 4WT 500 Club Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Tn Posts: 1,646	that is great! __________________ Traci

05-07-2008, 01:28 PM	#13
Janet Moderator Donating 4WT 18K Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: INDIANA Posts: 21,624	Aren't you two just hilarious!!! __________________ To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven. ECCLESIASTES 3:1

05-07-2008, 03:28 PM	#15
Janet Moderator Donating 4WT 18K Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: INDIANA Posts: 21,624	It was...LOL __________________ To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven. ECCLESIASTES 3:1

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