Just Friends?

[AngieDoogles]

So I've been trying to think of a good question to ask you "man," but nothing came to me at first. Well, today I was thinking about the movie "When Harry met Sally" and their conversation about men and women being friends. We've had a thread or two about that here as well. Harry basically says that men and women can't be "just friends" because emotions always get in the way and the man always thinks about sex. He says that it is even further complicated when either the man or the woman has a significant other. Anyway, my question is what is your take on this? Do you think it's possible to be "just friends"? How do you think this would affect the significant other? Do you think it's okay to have a best friend of the opposite sex when you are in a relationship with someone else?

Thanks!

[AngieDoogles]

And if that is too many questions feel free to answer any way you'd like. I was just trying to make sure that your answer was well-rounded and that you understood what I was asking.

[A Man]

If there is no sexual attraction or chemistry on behalf of both parties, then it is possible to be just friends. This can often occur for example, with a straight female and a gay male. Otherwise it may be difficult for either party to be just friends, as the thought of sex will be in the back of their minds.

Most men prefer their girlfriend or wife to have a best friend that is female, because men know how other men think, meaning men think about sex. If the man is not threatened by the female's male friend, then it may be okay. If a man is confident in himself, then it should not be a problem if his girlfriend or wife has a best friend that is male. If the woman is constantly choosing the best friend over her mate in terms of spending time together, then it can turn into a problem.

There may also may be situations where the female thinks of their male friend without sexual thoughts and thinks the male does not have any feelings either, but the man actually does have feelings for the woman. That can be problematic as well, and the woman does not know that their "best friend" has feelings for them and may may want to turn their friendship into something entirely different.

It's perfectly acceptable to have a male best friend, but to reassure their man, the woman can tell them that the relationship is strictly platonic and let their partner know of other details of the friend relationship. Even while being in a relationship it can work out okay, communication between the woman and her partner is key to making sure that the best friend relationship does not get in the way of her love relationship.

[AngieDoogles]

Thanks for the response. I hope this will be helpful insight for some of the ladies here.

As a side note...my hubby and I were "just friends" well before we started dating. But the only people who actually believed it was us, lol, and even that didn't last forever...