All about a Damn Massage...

11-09-2007, 11:45 PM

Ok, so first of all, Steven was talking to his forum buddies via chat and they we're shocked that he was married. I told them to tell them that he was because I was a total hottie, he paused! He had to think about weather or not he wanted to tell them I was hot! Steven's the damn one always saying how hot I am and how he brags it too the world and then he won't even say it in front of people he doen's know! I just assumed he'd jump at the opportunity to brag (like he says he always does) about me. since he bugs me most of the time anyways by saying how "I'm the most beautiful woman in the world"

Second, all of last week my back was really bothering, I strained it moving furniture, and I tried to hint and ask Steven MULTIPLE times if he could give me a back massage, every time finding an excuse NOT too. He says he's not good at them, or else he'd do a little half-ass rub thing. Well tonight, he pulled a muscle and asked ME to give him a back massage. WELL!! Now if maybe he would have given me a massage last week I would have been more inclined too help him but all I thought of was I asked ALL LAST WEEK for a massage and he said NO everytime and now he asks ME for a massage easy-peasy! Well I said NO cause of him not giving me one, and now he's all mad, thinking that I'm mean for not massaging his back.

Ahhhhhhh!!!!! I'm so Grrrrr! I just feel like I'm not worth being made to feel better but I need to bow down and do his wish if he's not feeling well. Don't get me wrong all, He's a wonderful person in all aspects, but right now I'm upset about the whole massage thing!

rivermom · 11-10-2007, 04:36 AM

The only thing I can come up with about him not being "open about you" online is to protect you. He personally doesn't know those he chats well with and didn't want them to get the wrong impression. I might consider that a compliment towards you. Besides, would you want complete strangers on his chat board to know physical characteristics about you? Ewwww that almost gives me the weebie jeebies.

And about the massage....I wouldn't worry too much about it. Maybe he just wasn't in the moment at that certain time to give you a massage. Possibly stress from the day or whatever. Who knows? Maybe you can plan a special "date night" where you both have some quiet time, setting a romantic scene, etc and focus on one another. It's so easy to become distracted with all the daily duties that we forget to care for one another.
I know myself I can be guilty about this towards my hubby. But once I can stand there for a moment, slow down, and focus we can them "come together".
Hope that makes some sense. LOL.

11-10-2007, 07:17 AM

Maybe you can get one of those vibrating massage things at the store so the machine does the work and not your hands....my DH used to ask for a back rub but I just wasn't really good at it, but those gadgets take the guess work out of it....I've even had him lay down and I resorted to using a rolling pin, he loooved it....believe me both of you will love it, it's so relaxing....just purchase it and come walking into the room and tell him to just roll over and be quiet...lol

I can kind of see why he didn't want to say anything about you on a chat forum, my DH would NEVER say anything about me on one of those, and it's not because he doesn't feel that way about me....he's more of the type who would tell me but not other people... I mean if he did tell people what kind of response would he expect in return...."Wow, really? I'd like to meet her"......it's just not a guy thing to do....

katepoet · 11-10-2007, 09:24 AM

When men feel like they can't do a good enough job at something like massage, they do tend to just mumble and drift away. It's not their intent to disappoint us, I think. Just a built in response to being over their heads. (Not that the same response didn't frustrate me to no end when I first got it! lol)

Sounds like you are not getting enough intimate time together to talk about your dreams and to fuel your connection. Hope you can take some time off from the daily grind to just be the two of you.

I am glad my husband doesn't say much about me online - the most important thing anyone needs to know is that "we" come first, before any other friendship or activity. That tells anyone that to him, I am the hottest thing on two legs - they don't need the details!!

11-14-2007, 12:36 PM

No worries, we fixed it.... as always, just a bit of miscommunication.

rivermom · 11-14-2007, 01:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Queen_Rayback

No worries, we fixed it.... as always, just a bit of miscommunication.

Good!

katepoet · 11-14-2007, 08:18 PM

Not surprised you got it straightened out, Glad it was quickly settled. Have fun!

AngieDoogles · 11-15-2007, 06:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Queen_Rayback

No worries, we fixed it.... as always, just a bit of miscommunication.

Glad to hear that things worked out so well!

11-09-2007, 11:45 PM	#1
Queen_Rayback Guest Posts: n/a	All about a Damn Massage... Ok, so first of all, Steven was talking to his forum buddies via chat and they we're shocked that he was married. I told them to tell them that he was because I was a total hottie, he paused! He had to think about weather or not he wanted to tell them I was hot! Steven's the damn one always saying how hot I am and how he brags it too the world and then he won't even say it in front of people he doen's know! I just assumed he'd jump at the opportunity to brag (like he says he always does) about me. since he bugs me most of the time anyways by saying how "I'm the most beautiful woman in the world" Second, all of last week my back was really bothering, I strained it moving furniture, and I tried to hint and ask Steven MULTIPLE times if he could give me a back massage, every time finding an excuse NOT too. He says he's not good at them, or else he'd do a little half-ass rub thing. Well tonight, he pulled a muscle and asked ME to give him a back massage. WELL!! Now if maybe he would have given me a massage last week I would have been more inclined too help him but all I thought of was I asked ALL LAST WEEK for a massage and he said NO everytime and now he asks ME for a massage easy-peasy! Well I said NO cause of him not giving me one, and now he's all mad, thinking that I'm mean for not massaging his back. Ahhhhhhh!!!!! I'm so Grrrrr! I just feel like I'm not worth being made to feel better but I need to bow down and do his wish if he's not feeling well. Don't get me wrong all, He's a wonderful person in all aspects, but right now I'm upset about the whole massage thing!

11-10-2007, 04:36 AM	#2
rivermom Donating 4WT 500 Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Tontitown, Arkansas Posts: 2,475	The only thing I can come up with about him not being "open about you" online is to protect you. He personally doesn't know those he chats well with and didn't want them to get the wrong impression. I might consider that a compliment towards you. Besides, would you want complete strangers on his chat board to know physical characteristics about you? Ewwww that almost gives me the weebie jeebies. And about the massage....I wouldn't worry too much about it. Maybe he just wasn't in the moment at that certain time to give you a massage. Possibly stress from the day or whatever. Who knows? Maybe you can plan a special "date night" where you both have some quiet time, setting a romantic scene, etc and focus on one another. It's so easy to become distracted with all the daily duties that we forget to care for one another. I know myself I can be guilty about this towards my hubby. But once I can stand there for a moment, slow down, and focus we can them "come together". Hope that makes some sense. LOL. __________________ ~_/> , /\/\ ,,, Sheryl When I grow up I want to be a horse whisperer!

11-10-2007, 07:17 AM	#3
oknbug Guest Posts: n/a	Maybe you can get one of those vibrating massage things at the store so the machine does the work and not your hands....my DH used to ask for a back rub but I just wasn't really good at it, but those gadgets take the guess work out of it....I've even had him lay down and I resorted to using a rolling pin, he loooved it....believe me both of you will love it, it's so relaxing....just purchase it and come walking into the room and tell him to just roll over and be quiet...lol I can kind of see why he didn't want to say anything about you on a chat forum, my DH would NEVER say anything about me on one of those, and it's not because he doesn't feel that way about me....he's more of the type who would tell me but not other people... I mean if he did tell people what kind of response would he expect in return...."Wow, really? I'd like to meet her"......it's just not a guy thing to do....

11-10-2007, 09:24 AM	#4
katepoet Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 992	When men feel like they can't do a good enough job at something like massage, they do tend to just mumble and drift away. It's not their intent to disappoint us, I think. Just a built in response to being over their heads. (Not that the same response didn't frustrate me to no end when I first got it! lol) Sounds like you are not getting enough intimate time together to talk about your dreams and to fuel your connection. Hope you can take some time off from the daily grind to just be the two of you. I am glad my husband doesn't say much about me online - the most important thing anyone needs to know is that "we" come first, before any other friendship or activity. That tells anyone that to him, I am the hottest thing on two legs - they don't need the details!!

11-14-2007, 12:36 PM	#5
Queen_Rayback Guest Posts: n/a	No worries, we fixed it.... as always, just a bit of miscommunication.

11-14-2007, 08:18 PM	#7
katepoet Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 992	Not surprised you got it straightened out, Glad it was quickly settled. Have fun!

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