Eco-friendly funeral/burial

[Janet]

This article was in the Lafayette Journal and Courier newspaper that we get on Sundays. It really struck me as something I'm really interested in. It made me feel really peaceful. What do you all think?

http://www.jconline.com/apps/pbcs.dl...=2012201220328

[JJJ]

I'm not religious at all so I can be cremated with no problem. I think that is more green than anything. I think the asking price for their green funeral is high considering some choose no casket.

[DianaB]

Sounds really nice. I suggest that you have what you want written and placed with your will so your family knows exactly what you want.

We own an old small cemetery on one of our farms. It's very pretty with wild orange lilies all over it in the summer. My FIL had mentioned to us several times that he wanted to be buried there........I heard him.....and Glen heard him.......but he failed to let the rest of the family know so he's at another cemetery.

We used to have a friend that worked in a funeral home and we asked him questions. In Kansas, at that time, you didn't have to be embalmed or buried in a casket but you DID have to be buried within 24 hours of dying. You probably wouldn't even have to be buried in a special cemetery if you checked into what your funeral home or you can actually do.

Funeral homes are a rip-off!!! They play on your......."this is the last thing I will ever do for this family member". They have certain terminology that they use to hit your heart strings.......they did that when my Dad passed away. We bought a "package" deal but that DIDN'T include the little paper handouts that you recieve at funerals!!! That was an EXTRA fee!!! I couldn't believe that one......so I ended up printing my own........I've never seen or heard of ANYONE ever doing that!!! A friend of mine had a funeral for her grandmother and it was a graveside like Dad's was and they paid half of what we paid!!! I will NEVER use that funeral home again!!! It still makes my blood boil!!!!

I do like the concept of this cemetery and I think that you'd be wise to check into it!!

[judy]

I have picked out this for my funeral too!

http://naturalburial.org/index.php

It is a couple of hours away from Jessie, but who knows where she will be living when I'm gone anyway. I do not like the idea of being put in a coffin at all! I used to think I wanted to be cremated, but I would prefer to be put in the ground. It seems so natural. I even have some of the music I want picked out!

The cost of this seems to vary. I am going to be making out a will, living will, etc., in the next week or so, and will really have to lok into this. I would want to prepay.

I also think it is a waste of money to pay for embalming, fancy coffins, etc. This is, of course, my personal opinion for me.

[DianaB]

That's a lot like what Janet found. I think that it's a good idea to have things planned ahead of time.

[Janet]

I just thought when I read it that it sounded so right...so peaceful and not so commercial. There are special places to be buried and they let them grow naturally. I really hadn't thought about it that much, but when I read that article in the newspaper....it sounded so right.

[Tiramisu]

I'll be buried in a pine box (hopefully made by my son) not embalmed, buried in a comfortable cotton gown, no funeral, no long wake. I LOVE this idea!

[Blueyes]

Around here you have to be buried in a casket with a vault. I didn't have my mom embalmed because I couldn't stand the thought of it, and my dad and my brothers let me choose everything. You have to be buried in a certain time frame if you aren't embalmed. I do not for the life of me understand how people can be persuaded to buy a bug free, moisture free specially sealed vault. I surely understand how you liked this idea, Janet. I like it, too!

[gja1000]

Isn't it so ironic that so many of us want the exact same thing!!! I actually would prefer my body be donated to science or a medical school, but my daughter has a problem with that so I probably won't. In the absence of that, I want the exact same thing, either cremation or buried in a plain pine box with no embalming, no expensive anything, no funeral, no wake. I would like my friends/family to get together (not necessarily at the time of my death) and enjoy each other at the lake, a restaurant, a park, any place, just NOT a funeral. And the only reason I would like them to get together at some point is how many times have you said, "oh it's so good to see you, we seem to only see each other at weddings and funerals........."

My daughter's dad died a couple of years ago and he had no money for any type of burial, so my daughter had to pay the bill. She had him cremated and bought the urn and little heart necklaces for her and his wife to put a few of his ashes in it. I think it was still $1500.00!!! The family just got together at a restaurant and they ate and talked. She said it was nice.

[Blueyes]

Mike just said today that he wanted his body donated to science, since he has so many different health problems maybe they could learn something from studying him. It's fine with me, so that's what we will do. I am an organ donor, myself... if there is anything not worn out on me when I die, lol!

[gja1000]

How weird Betsi, that Mike would say that TODAY as we are having this conversation.

Diana, you were talking about how funeral homes take advantage of grieving families and that is so true. Gary's mom died very unexpectedly back in the early 80's. The family was so shocked they couldn't make very good decisions. I saw the same thing happen to them at the funeral home. It was just awful. They paid for a funeral and things they had no money for. I don't know how it was ever paid off. I swore I would never allow that to happen to my family. My daughter knows I'd like to have my body donated to science, but since it is weird for her, I told her to do whatever she wanted with me, but NOT to spend a lot of money. Since she went through this with her dad, she understands what to do and not to do, so it will be OK. If she wants to bury me, that's fine, if she wants to cremate me that's fine too. I think though I will tell her if she wants to bury me, I'd like to go the "green" route. I didn't even know such a thing existed!

[Janet]

I guess the green burial is becominbmore and more popular. There are only a few green cemeteries here in Indian, but one just happens to be near Lafayette and thTs not far from us at all.

[gja1000]

http://www.walletblog.com/2010/04/ar...ost-effective/

This is a link to some info on green burials.

[DianaB]

Here's an interesting site on home burial. In Indiana and Texas you have to have a funeral home director but in 44 other states you don't have to. I can't imagine living in town and having my neighbor bury his wife in the back yard!!!

http://www.ehow.com/info_7817474_law...-property.html

[Lindsey]

Since I just went to a funeral yesterday, I have been thinking about it (you never know when it might happen!) and I want to talk to Scott about what I want. We don't have wills yet, but we will do that after we're married. So weird that this thread is here today!

I think the natural burial is a great idea. Nothing lasts forever, and all the chemicals not only in the body, but even in the coffin, don't need to be leaking into the soil. There is enough contamination on earth as it is!

On top of that, I've been thinking of how I want my funeral to be. I found out yesterday that my family and Scott's family do funerals WAY differently. For Scott's grandmother's funeral yesterday, we had to be at the funeral home 3 hours before the funeral in the church. We spent probably at least an hour in a room with the open coffin. Everyone was bawling and it was really tough for me to sit through. I was trying to comfort Scott and his mom and his aunts but it really got to me too, and I just needed to get out of there. I can not sit there and look at the dead body of a woman I used to know for an hour. Maybe some people need that for closure, but I know I do not want my family's last memory of me to be my lifeless body in a casket. It was really tough. The whole day just seemed so long and drawn out and I've never been to a funeral that was so somber. Everyone was just dragged down and focusing on death all day long.

Of course funerals are sad, but every funeral I've been to in my family has been a short service, usually including funny stories from the person's life and remembering how they were when they were alive, and later we would visit with family and remember the good times and talk and laugh! That's how I want it to be when I go. I don't want to make people so upset!