My best friend

[toodles]

I am going to try and make a long story short...but just needed to tell someone about this...and my bff made me promise not to tell anyone LOL. I figure this is safe...cuz you guys don't know her LOL it will all come out in the next day or 2 anyway

ok...well....she has been dating this guy for almost 4 years. he has been lying to her about a lot of things (past relationships that aren't completely dissolved, etc) and he actually cheated on her. Once that we know about but I keep hearing from other people that there were multiple women. anyway...she has taken him back and tried to work out the relationship. well, it has been VERY rocky to say the least. But she just goes on day after day enduring so much pain but yet acting like nothing ever happened. and he takes advantage of her every chance he gets. Well, yesterday, she called me crying. it just killed me because I love her more than I love almost anyone. But amidst her crying, she said she felt better than she ever has. ok....whatever but she said she realized that she just can't be with him anymore. That she hasn't loved him in a very long time. I asked why she was crying then..she said because she hates that she has let it drag on this long. She said the last time she remembers actually WANTING to be around him and with him was Oct 2005. that's a long time to be in a dating relationship and not feel anything. she just feels like she has wasted too much time. Well...i asked her what she was going to do and she said "well, when he gets home, he will see that I have been crying...and I am not going to lie to him when he asks why". so...it all went down last night. she told him exactly how she feels. Then she came over here, just to get away, and we sat on my front porch at 11pm just talking I love that. but she said she felt so good about it. That she felt free. I am so proud of her. I know how hard it was for her. She is a very prideful person which is, IMO, why she didn't leave him when he cheated on her. She didn't want it to end like that...SHE wanted to be the one to end it. She didn't want it to end on HIS terms. Anyway...she is on her way over here for breakfast. I just wanted to talk to someone about it because I am bursting at the seams I have had such a hard time being around this guy knowing what he did to her...and now it is over. Even I feel releived

I really feel like she has taken on the "battered wife syndrome" and I am glad she can start to move past that now...

[Taurus Babe]

I'm glad your girldfriend got out of a bad situation. Sometimes it can take a long time to realize these things are good for us, but I'm glad she finally came around. It's great she has such a good friend around to lean on for support and to help her though this hard (but happy) time!

[Janet]

I'm so glad she has made her decision. We can preach to our friends, relatives...whoever about why they should never let someone treat them that way, but until they see it and are ready to do something about it...it falls on deaf ears. Good for her!!! Now on to a better life!!!!

[DianaB]

It sounds like she really thought this out and was ready to make this decision on her own. You're a good friend to be concerned.

[Mandy]

Originally Posted by Janet

I'm so glad she has made her decision. We can preach to our friends, relatives...whoever about why they should never let someone treat them that way, but until they see it and are ready to do something about it...it falls on deaf ears. Good for her!!! Now on to a better life!!!!

Exactly


Best wishes to your friend.

[AngieDoogles]

I'm so glad to hear that your friend got out of a bad relationship. That's always such a hard step to take and she should be commended for her strength and bravery!

[toodles]

he is being sooooooo mean to her. he swears up and down that she left him for someone else but she isn't like that. he should know that. he just has a guilty concience because that is how he is...he is a cheater. he is constantly leaving her mean voicemails asking "how does __________'s bed feel??" it's just stupid. I told her that she just needs to tell him...it is no longer ANY of your business what I do with my personal life, now lose my number before I get a restraining order.

she is really at that point. She is staying so strong tho. I am so happy for her. I have not seen her this happy and "free" in a very long time. I have my friend back

[Mandy]

Its so nice to see friends happy. Glad she is dealing with it so smoothly! She definatly needs to tell him to get lost, or just ignore all hes sms's!

[judy]

Good for her! It's so hard to get out of that syndrome. It's so good that she has you for support.

[DianaB]

Someone once told me that we tend to think that people are just like us. So if you're a liar then you always think that you are lied to. If you're a trusting person then you think that you can always trust everyone. If you sleep around then you tend to think that everyone else is doing it too. I've always thought that was very interesting and how often it seems to be true.

It sounds like she is really through with this guy. Good for her!!! She doesn't deserve this guy bullying her so a restraining order may be something that she needs to keep in mind.

[AngieDoogles]

Originally Posted by toodles

I have my friend back

That's wonderful Mandee! I'm sure you are both so happy to be able to be friends again...

[toodles]

just an update...

she has definitely separated from him...and she has basically just shut him down. I have spent a lot of time with her lately and she is so happy these days. I am just happy for her. She seems 10 years younger these days. It's great.

Thanks for all the supportive thoughts..you guys are all very sweet

[Janet]

I hate to see any marriage dissolved, but sometimes it just has to be. Her well being and sanity was at stake and it sounds like she gave it her all. Glad she's doing better and you have got to be a great friend to see her through this.

[Tink]

I'm so glad she had the will power and strength to get away from that man. I hope she finds life is a whole lot better without him!

She's lucky to have such a great friend as you to support her.