Is it wrong?

[Tink]

I truly enjoy being home by myself and working on my house and lawn on my own schedule. I'm enjoying not having a job, see no need to be forcing myself to join and participate in all sorts of organizations, and my dh is content with letting me do my own thing. He and I are getting along much better since I decided to reclaim the title of "housewife" as much as that title makes me cringe.

My mother and oldest dd are worried that I'm too much of a hermit and keep on me about how unhealthy it is. I'm not depressed, I'm not afraid to go out, I talk to friends and family several times a week, and have many online friends I keep in touch with as well. As far as I'm concerned, this is the life I choose. To hear them tell it, I'm in denial and they're only trying to save me from myself.

So if I'm content, is it wrong to live as I do? Would I somehow be "better" if I force myself to do things I have no interest in doing and give up my own desires? Why can't they see that I'm just wired differently than they are?

[Mandy]

Tink, whats MOST important here, is YOU, and the way you chose to live your life! If you, and your hubby are happy this way, then dont worry too much about what other people tell you. Maybe your mom and dd are used to you working, etc etc... and they havent seen this side of you yet?

[AngieDoogles]

Originally Posted by Mandy

Tink, whats MOST important here, is YOU, and the way you chose to live your life! If you, and your hubby are happy this way, then dont worry too much about what other people tell you. Maybe your mom and dd are used to you working, etc etc... and they havent seen this side of you yet?

I agree with Mandy, Tink. I think you should do whatever makes you happy. If you were depressed and that was the reason you are staying home, I'd be a bit worried, but you know yourself and whether or not you are sad. Maybe you could tell them the things you like about being at home so that they could understand you a little better? Anyway, I just want to emphasize that you need to do whatever makes you happy!

[DianaB]

Tink, I'm glad that you've found what you enjoy doing! The term "housewife" is one that I don't like either. I'm not married to my house! I prefer to call myself a "homemaker" because I feel that's more what my job is, to make a nice home for my family. I'm glad that things have worked out where you have the choice of working or staying home.

[Janet]

Tink, dear friend...you are not just a 'housewife.' There is wwaaayyy more to it than that. You are a domestic engineer!!! I love being home during the middle of the day to do what I want and need to do. I'd rather not work at all, but we need the insurance so I'm a bus driver. Hours are great, I can make more if I want to do extra-curricular and sports trips. Have many vacations days, 2 weeks off at Christmas and New Year's and still have summers off.

You would know if you needed more. I think a lot of times, people say things to us because they are jealous we have so much time to take care of our homes, yards and OURSELVES!! Some women want to work...there is nothing wrong with that, I use to want to work and worked everybit of overtime I could. Not because we needed the money, I just liked working. Now at my age, I'm ready to slow down a bit. You just be happy girl!! You'll know when you need something more.

[goofywife]

I wish I could stay at home. There are a lot of people that stay at home. It doesn't make them a hermit. Hermits don't associate with anyone. You associate with a lot of people on 4WT

[Marilyn]

Tink, the only people you have to please here on this earth are yourself and your hubby. If you both are happy with your situation, then the rest of them need to make sure their households are in as good a shape and leave you alone.

You may decide later that you want to get out and work again, but enjoy where you are while you can.

I wish I could take off for a while, but we need the insurance and retirement savings that I am able to provide. Also, my working takes some of the stress off hubby when the housing market fluctuates.

Don't worry, be happy!!!!

[Tink]

Thanks friends, I get frustrated at the comments from others about my current choice, so needed some support. I can always count on you to help me out.

I might decide to work again, but for now it's nice to just have some free time and do what I choose to. It's annoying that no matter what we do it seems someone has to find fault. I've actually been checking out some telecommuting jobs, which would mean I could work from home again, but even if I decide to go that route I know they'll still think I should be out of the house. The 7 yrs I've telecommuted in the past, I found it was hard for my family to see it as legitimate employment simply because I didn't have to leave home to do it.

Oh well... As I have in my siggy... "I've learned that making a "living" is not the same thing as "making a life." and right now I'm focussing on making a life.

[Emmsmom]

It is a realy shame that we don't live closer. We could be hermits together! I dare anyone of them to work with "her" for 7 years and then have someone tell them it wasn't work! If you like staying at home and working in the garden and it mkaes you happy then I wouldn't worry about it. After knowing you for so long I can't blame you for wanting to relax. You deserve to have some quiet time!

[Janet]

I hope you're feeling better about your decision to stay home for awhile Tink. What matters is only what you and your husband think, ignore what the nay sayers have to say. Enjoy your time.

[rivermom]

Tink - your life sounds perfect to me, LOL. Gosh, being home where it's quiet, being w/ friends when you choose, getting out when you choose, etc. How could that be bad??

You feel happy and content, that's what counts. I hope intime your family feels your happiness and understands how you feel all the changes you've made for yourself in your life feels good. We could all be so lucky!