Feeling low today

[Ponyup]

I know it seems all i do is come on here & complain & i'm sorry, I just have no where else to get out these feelings. I'm very frustrated with my job situation not only are they going to take most of my work, but they are going to change the system I built. This change could be a good thing, but I just don't like change. So i'm very nervous about how things will be for the next month. The guy that they are giving my work to is very lazy & does things half-a**ed so I know things will get very screwed up & then it will be my responsibility to fix it. Plus most people don't think he can handle it & it will all come back to me with little or no time to finish the work. I try to talk to my husband, but he is currently frustrated with his job & it just turns into him bitching about his job. Plus he doesn't get why i worry about it because it's not going to be my problem anymore. But i don't want the company to have problems because this guy is doing the work wrong.

Also my toe is healing more slowly then I'd like. The blister finally popped & the blister skin is finally starting to dry up. I've found a tattoo nurse on line i talk to & she said this is totally normal. But it's frustrating I just want the skin to be healed already so I can see the removal work. I have a followup on thurs. with my actual nurse & she should say whether or not I have anything to worry about so at least that should help.

again thanks for listening again.

Plus i'm so sick of this stupid cold.

[Janet]

I think most of us are sick of the cold and ready for spring. Don't feel bad if you have to complain. Sometimes we just have to get it out or feel like we're going crazy.

My only advice is when you start thinking about this guy and his future screw ups, try thinking of something else. Get up, get a drink, walk, anything to get him out of your mind. Just concentrate on what you need to do and do it better than anyone else.

It may not take long for him to hang himself...you're wasting time on something you can't control.

Hope you starting feeling better about it all. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you. Oh...you come and vent anytime you need to. That's why we're here.

[AngieDoogles]

Aww, I'm sorry you're feeling frustrated. Like Janet said, he'll make a mistake sooner or later that gets noticed. Feel free to come here and vent anytime you need. We're here to listen no matter what!

[DianaB]

I'm sorry too that you have to deal with this guy at work. I don't think that anyone has a perfect job. As for your toe, just give it time!!

Do not know you, Do not know your situation, but I thought I would send you this........... and then and then

HOPE THIS HELPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Marilyn]

Awww, Rhonda, you are going to fit right in here!!!!!

[Janet]

That's what I was going to say Marilyn. Rhonda, that was very sweet!

[Ponyup]

Thank you for the hugs I really need them right now. My boss says i have nothing to worry about with my job. She wants to move me in a different direction that she thinks I will like and excel at. So that should be good.

As for my toe, i'm still freaked out. I've done tons of research & talked to my doctor & everyone says i'm prefectly normal, but I'm so afraid of what my skin looks like under the dead blister skin. I know I need to find a way to relax & just wait, but that is so hard for me. I've prayed for God to bring me peace about the situation, but it doesn't seem to work. I'm still very upset. i know i just have to be patience. My doctor said I'm taking very good care of it & the blister skin will start to peal off shortly. I'm still very worried about what it will look like underneath so I put a call into the office this morning for her to call me. So hopefully she does soon.

You know I am a Chief of an EMS department and sometimes my members are like what the heck is the Boss thinking I see in them what they do not see in themselves. That is why I am the Boss I have people who THINK they will make a good Officer and ones I KNOW will make a good Officer. So many people fall into a COMFORT zone with their jobs and I think a good leader says That person needs to come out of their comfort zone and develop/excel in another area.
Did that make sense?
Your Boss sees something in you and they want you to excel!!!
Your Boss maybe giving it to this other person for justification of a termination!

[Ponyup]

Originally Posted by Rhonda

You know I am a Chief of an EMS department and sometimes my members are like what the heck is the Boss thinking I see in them what they do not see in themselves. That is why I am the Boss I have people who THINK they will make a good Officer and ones I KNOW will make a good Officer. So many people fall into a COMFORT zone with their jobs and I think a good leader says That person needs to come out of their comfort zone and develop/excel in another area.
Did that make sense?
Your Boss sees something in you and they want you to excel!!!
Your Boss maybe giving it to this other person for justification of a termination!

Thanks Rhonda, I think they think this other person needs more supervision or something. Everyone knows I don't need supervision just a direction & i'll be good. I think that's why I get to stay under my current boss & he has to be to another boss. I believe my boss is excited with the new freedom she has for my skills. It could turn out to be really good & excited for me. I'll just have to wait & see. And breathe.

[Janet]

I was also wondering if maybe you should see your Dr. about these feelings you're having about your toe. Maybe he can give you something to relieve the anxiety a little bit. I love my Xanax, but only use it when absolutely necessary. I hate for you to be so on edge about this.

[Ponyup]

I have xanax I just try not to take it too much. I take a half of pill before bed & that seems to help me at least sleep. I talked to a girl on line today that said i'm totally normal & this skin will peel off like a sun burn. I really hope it happens soon. But i'm starting to feel a bit better.

I may take a half of xanax as soon as i get home so I can have a better dinner with my g-pa tonight. Right now I'm just thinking of the worst things that can happen & none of them are really that bad, so I really have nothing to be worried about. Now if only my head could convince my stomach.

[Ponyup]

I've decided to tell my mom about my tattoo & removal. One of the big reasons for the tattoo removal is that i know how disappointed she would of been in me when she sees it. At the time I got the two other tattoos my mom & I weren't in the best place. Now we have gotten pretty close & I feel so guilty & ashamed about this. Every time I talk to her I feel like I'm lying to her because I pretend like I'm happy & everything is okay. Everything is not okay. I'm so mad at myself & I regret this decision so much & I'm terrified of the removal. And quite frankly I feel that i need my mommy.

I feel God is telling me to tell her. I have prayed & begged about this & it's really drawn me back to church. At church yesterday it was like every song we sang was talking straight to me. They were all about turning your worries & fears over to God. I've found a way to trick my self to sleep which is I sing a song over & over in my head to fall asleep. Last nights song was "it is well with my soul". I slept pretty well, & this morning I woke up with this over whelming urge to talk to my mom about what's going on with me. It seems to me like this is what God is urging me to do. I'm terrified to tell her, I know she might be disappointed or point out how stupid it was in the first place, but I doubt it. She tends to be really judgemental, but when I actually need her & she can tell I'm upset about something she's always there for me. Some people think she might even go to the treatments with me. Please pray that this helps with my nerves & I start to feel better & that she takes a mind of support instead of judgement. If this doesn't help my next step is therapy.

[judy]

I like you Rhonda!