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Originally Posted by Janet
I envy those that have great relationships with their mothers. I never did and probably won't.
I've written before that I do love my mom and sometimes we get a long good and she can be so funny....but that is if things are going her way.
One of the main reasons I never enjoyed Christmas was because she was so mean at that time. My younger brother and I would want to help decorate the Christmas tree and she would let us hang a few ornaments on and then start yelling at us that we put it in the wrong place. She wanted every ornament in the exact same place every year. It was horrible. Plus she has always lived in the same house I grew up in (lives there still) and it's very small. Not enough room for everyone, but she will not have it anywhere else. She did let me have Thanksgiving one year, but she didn't like it...everyone else did.
She is very selfish, self centered and wants people to go out of their way for her, but will never go out of her way for any one else. I have been married 32 years and other than Thanksgiving or Christmas, she has never invited us in for a meal, but is always eager to eat out our house or my brothers.
A good friend of hers passed and we went to the funeral home. One lady told her that she (my mother) had a good daughter and my mom said "she could if she tried a little harder." It really hurt my feelings, but that's my mom.
I could go on and on and on, but this little bit gives you an idea of what I deal with. I only call her now about once a week if that, for her health reasons. She is just so toxic for me to be around I just have to limit it.
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Aww Janet, this is so sad to hear... She has and is missing out on a great relationship with you her daughter... If she is a self centered person, no matter what you do, will never be good enough. At this stage of the game you have two choices, I would just tell her point blank on how you feel. Lay all the cards on the table and tell her that you have felt hurt, maybe she never realized that she is acting this way. Was your grandmother the same way? Or just ignore it and you do realize that she is not going to change at this point and accept the relationship for what it is....