I also have dealt with an alcoholic in the past (my older brother). Until your husband admits he has a drinking problem (and a person with a drinking problem is one who can't get through a single day without having a drink - and then can't stop with one), he will continue just as he has been. Also, as Janet said, he may be dealing with some depression and added with the drinking - not good. My heart goes out to you and am so glad you found this place - GREAT place to vent, laugh, and lean on shoulders (there are some great ones here). Try to get into counseling with him, or go alone. You will feel so much better
Oh, and welcome to 4WT - hope you stick around and give us a chance to get to know you and you get to know us.