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06-05-2007, 01:49 PM
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#1 |
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Guest
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What do you say...
What do you say to a friend whose husband just passed... by his own hand??
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06-05-2007, 02:08 PM
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#2 |
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Moderator
Donating 4WT 13K Club Member 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Kansas
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Just tell her that you're there for her if she needs you. Bring over a supper so she doesn't have to worry about food. Let her talk and just listen. Offer to help out in any way that you can.
I know that when I had a miscarriage that was very painful emotionally I had a lot of people who would ask how I was doing and I always answered, fine. I learned through that when I ask others how they're doing and they say fine to say "Now how are you really doing?" That opens it up that you're willing and have the time to talk to her if she wants to talk about it.
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*´¨) ¸.•´¸.•*´¨) ¸.•*¨) (¸.•´ (¸.•` ¤ Diana Baker ✞ You and I are friends.......
Always remember that if you fall I will pick you up...... After I stop laughing!!! |
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06-05-2007, 04:58 PM
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#3 |
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Donating 4WT 2000 Club Member
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Location: Rural Wisconsin
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Just a hug and "I'm so sorry" then make yourself available because in cases of suicide people shy away 'cause they just don't know what to say and fear saying the wrong thing.
With a real friend you dont need a lot of words. Just being there speaks it all.
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'A simple way to take measure of a country is to look at how many want in.. And how many want out.' England 's Prime Minister Tony Blair' |
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06-05-2007, 06:08 PM
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#4 |
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Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: South and Central Texas
Posts: 337
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Be there for her. I'd imagine that since it was by his own hand that she'll feel as if she's responsible and it's her fault, just let her know it isn't her fault.
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Marilyn's Disappearing Daughter!! Cake or Death, Melissa "Therefore do not throw away your confidence, which has a great reward. For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God you may receive what is promised." Heb 10:35-36 |
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06-05-2007, 06:11 PM
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#5 |
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Donating 4WT 4000 Club Member
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I agree with Lissa that it's very important to let her know that it isn't her fault. Like the others said, the best thing you can do is just be there for her and play it by ear. Talk to her if that's what she wants and just be there for her if she isn't ready to talk about it just yet. I'm sorry that this tragedy has happened, but I'm glad your friend has you to be there for her. That will mean more to her than you could know, I'm sure.
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"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." ~MT |
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06-06-2007, 03:13 AM
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#6 |
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Moderator
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What a very sad thing to go through. I would definitely be there for her. Let her do most of the talking, but assure her it isn't her fault. Assure her that there are many people who are just feeling so overwhelmed that they can't think clearly and if he would have been, he wouldn't have done this. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem, but when we feel so overwhelmed we don't think about the consequences and what it does to those that are left behind.
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To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven. ECCLESIASTES 3:1 |
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