Are you happy with your body?

[Amber_lv]

I used to be a size 4 untill i got pregnant with my first baby and then i bloated up and he messed up my metabolism and i just can't seem to loose it no matter how hard i try!

i hate my body..

when i was a freshman in highschool i was at my prime.. i was SO in shape and had a really nice toned body if i must say so myself.. i was very active playing basketball on the dance team and all that fun stuff..

well when i met my bf (now my fiance) ... i started taking the shot, its birth control called depo provera.. and thats when my life was ruined..

i took the shot for a year and did not notice any of the weight gain till it was too late.. when i was a freshman i was 100 lbs and i was toned and curvy in all the right places .. (ahh memories lol)..

then in that year i was on the shot, i had gained 50 pounds.. yes i was 5'0 tall and 150lbs it was not a pretty site to see at all..

well of course my self esteem went down the drain.. so it wasnt until after highschool and after nursing school that i decided to lose some weight.. i started losing weight (of course by now i was off the stupid shot ughh!).. and i had finally gotten down to 115 lbs.. and then i got pregnant.. LOL..

and here i am again fat and ugly.. and to make matters worse, its only been 2 months.. and everyone keeps rubbing it in my face how fat i am..

between no sleep, always having to do something with my baby, either feeding, changing, showering etc or doing house duties like laundry, cleaning up my messy room.. i have barely any time to go to the gym.. but even though i am dead tired i still go.. but i just hate my body right now..

i hate hate hate hate hate it.. it makes me depressed thinking about it actually..

im hoping that i will lose this pregnancy fat fast.. not only for my sake.. but for everyone else who keeps torturing me about it..

my fiance is the only person who is so supportive of me.. i guess thats all that matters but i'd like to get to how my body was when we first met lol