Mother-Daughter relationships

[Kimberley]

Originally Posted by Janet

I envy those that have great relationships with their mothers. I never did and probably won't.

I've written before that I do love my mom and sometimes we get a long good and she can be so funny....but that is if things are going her way.

One of the main reasons I never enjoyed Christmas was because she was so mean at that time. My younger brother and I would want to help decorate the Christmas tree and she would let us hang a few ornaments on and then start yelling at us that we put it in the wrong place. She wanted every ornament in the exact same place every year. It was horrible. Plus she has always lived in the same house I grew up in (lives there still) and it's very small. Not enough room for everyone, but she will not have it anywhere else. She did let me have Thanksgiving one year, but she didn't like it...everyone else did.

She is very selfish, self centered and wants people to go out of their way for her, but will never go out of her way for any one else. I have been married 32 years and other than Thanksgiving or Christmas, she has never invited us in for a meal, but is always eager to eat out our house or my brothers.

A good friend of hers passed and we went to the funeral home. One lady told her that she (my mother) had a good daughter and my mom said "she could if she tried a little harder." It really hurt my feelings, but that's my mom.

I could go on and on and on, but this little bit gives you an idea of what I deal with. I only call her now about once a week if that, for her health reasons. She is just so toxic for me to be around I just have to limit it.

Hugs to you, Janet. I'm sorry that your mother is this way and has treated you poorly. You are a really nice person...(maybe you got your personality from your dad. ) Hang in there...something in her life has made her not-so-friendly...maybe her parents???

[Janet]

I am very much like my dad...LOL I don't know how he and my mother got together. He was so easy going and oh so funny. I use to feel so sorry for him when Mom would get on one of her tirades. No matter what "story" dad would tell some one, some of the facts may have been wrong (which really didn't matter) would be pointed out by my mother. She always had to be right.

Like I said, we do love each other. Mom would like us to be closer just as I would, but she'll never change and as it is, it's just too toxic for me. I would hate to tell her exactly how I feel, like someone suggested earlier, but if something were to happen to her, I would hate to have that on my mind. So, I will continue to love her, but at a little bit of a distance.

[RLC12345678]

My mother and I are very close. However, when I was growing up, she made sure I knew that she was my "mother" and not my "friend." Now that I am pretty much grown, we are now more like friends. I talk to her on the phone AT LEAST once a day. I love going home to see her. She said that she and my dad will move whereever my hubby and I settle and she will take care of my children for me while I work.