Gifts - are we being cheap?

[JJJ]

Ok Lindsey this is how my family is. For X-Mas I tell everyone I will only be able to afford the kids gifts. I do exactly that, just buy the kids gifts. I always get something from my oldest sis even thought she knows she won't get anything. The others don't give me anything as expected. I for one prefer for them to save those few dollars they would spend on me on themselves.

As far as birthday gifts for your nephew you guys didn't get invited so a card is more than enough. Do you think they will buy your kids presents one day when you guys aren't even close. If grandma wants her grandkids to have tons of presents she needs to go get them herself. I think Scott is head on with this one. Presents add up and once you have kids you need that extra money spoiling your kids not somebody else responsibility. Lindsey, you will never please your MIL so forget about her and what she thinks other people should do. She's her husbands problem not yours.

[gja1000]

Lindsey, I agree with Jessica, I wouldn't buy gifts either. It's just too expensive to buy for everyone, especially after you have your own kids! Just ignore the gift remarks.

[Lindsey]

Scott and I have talked about if we have kids in the next few years, they will get the short end of the stick for presents lol! I don't want to be buying everyone gifts forever... I don't mind for the little kids, but the older they get, the more expensive things are. I don't want to still be buying them all gifts when they are teenagers (and we'll probably see even less of them then!). So eventually, we will stop with the Christmas gifts for everyone, when they are older. But when those kids are older, our kids would still be young - will they buy our little kids gifts if we stop buying their older kids gifts? Not likely!

But in the end, I don't think it will bother me if anyone doesn't buy our kids gifts. I don't think that would be anyone's responsibility but our own. But I don't like feeling guilted into doing it for others when I know the same rules will probably not apply for us. We are the definite outsiders for not having kids yet.

[DianaB]

I don't think that you should have to buy gifts either. When our kids were little and we only had a few neices and nephews we would buy gifts.....or draw names among the kids but anymore there is just too many and you have to draw the line somewhere.

Personally, I think that Christmas should be more about getting together and less about the gifts. Kids get so many gifts that it doesn't hurt them to go to a gathering and not recieve one. Don't be bullied into buying a gift when you don't feel that you need to.

[judy]

You and Scott weren't even invited to the birthday party, so why would you sebd a gift? And why did they not invite their child's godfather to his first birthday party? That family is full of whack jobs!

I think you should make your own rules about gifts. If you don't want to give birthday gifts, that's fine! His mother needs to take a naked shower with his father!

[DianaB]

I know that you weren't talking about Christmas gifts but something that we do for people that we don't feel like buying a gift for is........we buy a movie, a package of popcorn and some candy and give them a "Movie Night". It's an expensive gift and it can be for the whole family.......and I try to make it a family movie.

[Lindsey]

Originally Posted by DianaB

I know that you weren't talking about Christmas gifts but something that we do for people that we don't feel like buying a gift for is........we buy a movie, a package of popcorn and some candy and give them a "Movie Night". It's an expensive gift and it can be for the whole family.......and I try to make it a family movie.

That is a great idea Diana!!! A few years ago, we gave my brother and his fiance a "date night" for Christmas. What else do you get a couple who buys whatever they need? We got them a gift certificate to a nice restaurant, a gift certificate to the movie theatre, and a card saying we will come over and watch the girls for the night so they don't have to find a babysitter.

Last year, part of their gift to us was buying a goat in our name for an impoverished family in Africa. I thought that was such an awesome idea. This year we are going to donate to the WWF in their name. In return, they will get a certificate and a little stuffed animal of the endangered species they "adopted" We just have to choose which species we would like! So we will do that for the whole family, as well as a framed professional picture of the girls from our wedding, and a little gift each for the girls. I really like the charity idea I kind of hope it turns into a tradition between us!

[Lindsey]

Lol Judy!!!!! This nephew is not Scott's godson, his older brother is. We always seem to be around for his birthday (not because of an invitation from them, just his mom telling us we need to go), and we have always got him a gift. Anyways, in the end we did send a card and did not get any indication if they've received it or anything. I was texting with his sister yesterday, asking what her stepdaughter would like for Christmas, and it would have been an opportunity for her to say thanks for the card, but she didn't say anything. Oh well.

Diana, I agree that Christmas should be less about gifts. When I was little, I just thought Santa brought me gifts, with maybe one or two from my parents. I didn't grow up thinking I should get gifts from everyone!!!