Have we gotten more judgmental?

[Marilyn]

In another thread, we were discussing retro television, and Tink mentioned that on the Dean Martin Show, he smoked and drank and it was still considered family viewing.

This is so true. I look back at how we dressed in the 60' and 70's and it seems that we have gotten more judgmental than in the past. We wore short skirts or shorts and halter tops and it was okay, but we did not sleep around. Now the everyday dress is actually more conservative, but more people are sexually active.

It's kinda like there is more bad in the world so to differentiate from the bad, we have gone extreme on where we draw the line sometimes. And yet, we are more accepting of other behaviors that in the past were considered bad.

Example:

Then - It was okay for Dean Martin to drink and smoke on TV, but it was unthinkable that a graphic love scene would be shown. They went so far as to have married couples in twin beds, i.e. Dick Van Dyke Show.

Now - Drinking and smoking would be very out of place on a "family" show, but living together and not being married would be okay. Also, homosexuality during family time on TV is now considered okay.

Maybe we are not more judgmental, just that the standards of appropriateness have changed. Any thoughts?

[Janet]

Originally Posted by Marilyn

In another thread, we were discussing retro television, and Tink mentioned that on the Dean Martin Show, he smoked and drank and it was still considered family viewing.

This is so true. I look back at how we dressed in the 60' and 70's and it seems that we have gotten more judgmental than in the past. We wore short skirts or shorts and halter tops and it was okay, but we did not sleep around. Now the everyday dress is actually more conservative, but more people are sexually active.

It's kinda like there is more bad in the world so to differentiate from the bad, we have gone extreme on where we draw the line sometimes. And yet, we are more accepting of other behaviors that in the past were considered bad.

Example:

Then - It was okay for Dean Martin to drink and smoke on TV, but it was unthinkable that a graphic love scene would be shown. They went so far as to have married couples in twin beds, i.e. Dick Van Dyke Show.

Now - Drinking and smoking would be very out of place on a "family" show, but living together and not being married would be okay. Also, homosexuality during family time on TV is now considered okay.

Maybe we are not more judgmental, just that the standards of appropriateness have changed. Any thoughts?

Marilyn, you have brought up some very interesting thoughts. I'm not sure if we're more accepting, maybe just a little more hardened. We tend to stay quiet and look the other way.

As far as Dean Martin's show, it really wasn't "family" viewing. It was aimed more at adults and the cocktails and smoking went on in most families until it was discovered just how dangerous it actually was. The short skirts and halter tops were not okay back then. There was a movement going on, hippie lifestyle, Vietnam..etc. Those that dressed like that were judged as druggies and crazies (many were). Our parents were horrified. Now they are wearing short tops and low riders or see through, skimpy tops. I think we just quit voicing our concerns unless it's to our children and some parents don't even bother.

As for the sleeping around...it was done just as much...just not as out in the open. Television and movies didn't help either. The knew it was going on, people letting it happen, so why not make money showing on the tube or theaters. Life has become so much more dangerous even for the simple folk. You don't dare voice your opinion or face some kind of retribution. It's scary, the world we live in.

I really think we are just as judgemental as we were back then, people just look the other way, too busy to want to make a stand so we don't. Not meaning we are more accepting, just too tired and feel what good will it do anyway.

[Kimberley]

I think that the American ways have gotten very "loose". Look at t.v. programming. 20 years ago, the worst cuss word you would have heard on a show was "damn". I'm totally appalled at the cuss words they say on shows now. Not just any cuss word but when I hear the Lord's name taken in vain...is when I change the channel.

On the thread "it's all about YOU" I know that I came across as being a "bad girl" but that was when I was much younger without kids or a husband. I've gotten more conservative as I've gotten older and I also appreciate good humor and good movies...without all of the trash.

[Janet]

Originally Posted by Kimberley

I think that the American ways have gotten very "loose". Look at t.v. programming. 20 years ago, the worst cuss word you would have heard on a show was "damn". I'm totally appalled at the cuss words they say on shows now. Not just any cuss word but when I hear the Lord's name taken in vain...is when I change the channel.

On the thread "it's all about YOU" I know that I came across as being a "bad girl" but that was when I was much younger without kids or a husband. I've gotten more conservative as I've gotten older and I also appreciate good humor and good movies...without all of the trash.

Same here. I was so onry as a kid. I'd try to get away with anything. How my parents put up with me without locking me up is beyond me. As I've gotten older, I too, matured. I still appreciate good humor, and sometimes even though I don't really like the raunchy bad stuff, I will still get tickled at something. Just like that Fruit Cake Lady I posted about in another thread. I usually don't want to listen to that kind of language, but that lady cracked me up!!!!

[DianaB]

I agree with Janet that we've become hardened to what's around us. I think that if people from the 60's and 70's could see what's going on now and what's being worn I think that they would be shocked.

Sure we had mini-skirts and halter tops in the 70's but I don't remember them being as provocative as the clothing is now. It's like the clothes that you see on people is to make you see them as sexual. And it's what every girl's wearing, good and bad. I have a college aged daughter who dresses trendy and in nice clothes, but sometimes it seems like she shows way too much cleavage.

Girls are showing what they have to anyone who will look. What about low-cut jeans with the top of a thong showing? What's the purpose? It's to, again, be noticed for their sexuality. It's no wonder that younger and younger kids are sexually active. It's all around us!!

What's coming next? Topless? Naked? Can it get any worse? How's it going to affect our kids and our society? Am I more judgemental? Yes, and I feel that I am justified in being judgemental!!!!

[Tink]

I think each generation and society picks different things to be appalled by.
Anything in excess is bad for us, and can come around to bite us in the butt, yet we go from one extreme to another over time.

I remember girls wearing hip huggers in the 70's that were SO low some were teased about having to comb their hair twice to wear them. I don't know that they were ANY better than what we see today. Back then it was "braless" rather than whale tails... thick slutty makeup rather than wild hairstyles.

Each age has it's concerns. As we get older I think it's easy to forget how we might have looked "back then" and become more judgemental about those who are young and strutting their stuff now.

JMHO

[Marilyn]

Originally posted by DianaB:
"Sure we had mini-skirts and halter tops in the 70's but I don't remember them being as provocative as the clothing is now. It's like the clothes that you see on people is to make you see them as sexual."

I think you are right in this statement. The halter tops and hip-huggers were pretty mainstream around here in the south, anyway. Not just reserved for the hippies and druggies. Some were more revealing than others and some hip-huggers were lower and trashier than others. I came from a very conservative religious background, and I wore some halter tops and hip-huggers the less revealing cuts, and my pant's weren't super low, but still, I showed a little more flesh than I would ever be comfortable with my daughters showing, but it wasn't an outright sexual look like now.

You also mention the cleavage shown now. We didn't show cleavage in the '70's like they do now. My oldest college aged daughter wears clothes probably similiar to your daughter DianaB. She's a really nice girl, but sometimes I go up to her and pull her neckline up and let her know that it's too low and she should not dress like that. She knows better, but it's the style and she wears a shirt under, but it does not come up high enough for me.

I just pray a lot about our children. Not just mine, our society's children. We had a lot of bad influences to contend with, but they have an even greater challenge.