Christmas at my Mother's

[Janet]

Originally Posted by Tink

Merry Christmas Eve ladies!
We're going to my brothers tonight for supper and to open gifts. Hopefully hubby and I will go to 10 pm church after.

My daughter is going to be there, so I hope I can just keep up my ignoring her bait. She's been here twice since she moved out to pick up mail and both times she was baiting me with comments like "I have no home" and "I've been drunk almost steady since I moved out". I know she wants me to have a fit and argue with her and I simply refuse. It was her choice to move out, and I know there's nothing to be gained by fighting with her over any of it. I hope she will behave for Christmas, but am not at all sure she will.

I think you're doing the right thing. When she brings up that she doesn't have a home....nicely tell her she does, but with rules...don't discuss it further. If she says anymore about being drunk, tell her you love her and hopes she takes care of her health....no more. Let her know you still love her, but don't fight with her. Just walk away if you have to. If any other family members mention it tonight, kindly tell them it doesn't concern them and that you and your husband are doing what you feel is best and that it is not open for discussion. It's none of their business anyway.

Merry Christmas to you too Tink...I wish you the very best!!!

[Tink]

Thank You Janet

My Mom and other daughter are aware of what's going on and agree that we're doing the only sensible thing with regard to Katie. My brother and his wife have probably been told about it by my mom by now. Bro and his wife are very strict, no nonsense people who I think would support what we've said. So at least for that part I'm not too worried.

My guess is that if Katie starts in too bad she will have a houseful of family telling her what's what. It just wouldn't make for a real pleasant night and I doubt she'd listen to any of them. It would likely end up like an intervention... which you really don't want to do on Christmas.

My wish is that Katie would just realize what she's doing to herself and turn it around. Maybe a Christmas miracle... It's hard to watch someone self destruct and not be able to stop them. Hopefully God will intervene, because no person seems able to reach her.