17 yr old daughter, need I say more?

DianaB · 11-20-2007, 01:40 PM

Teen age years!!!!! We should just lock them in a closet starting about age 14 and let them out when they're 20!!!!! I've got 3 that are well past teen years and one that's in the midst (15).

One of the most important things that I can say about teens is to keep the communication open. Convey ALL of your concerns about your daughter's grades to her. Sometimes, as parents, we push and push, but ultimately the choice is theirs and I think that they rebel at all of the pushing. Let her know how important her decisions are to her future and then put it back in her lap as to what she's going to do about it. Let HER take responsibility for her own decisions. I know that it's easier said then done too! Good luck!

rivermom · 11-20-2007, 04:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DianaB

Teen age years!!!!! We should just lock them in a closet starting about age 14 and let them out when they're 20!!!!! I've got 3 that are well past teen years and one that's in the midst (15).

One of the most important things that I can say about teens is to keep the communication open. Convey ALL of your concerns about your daughter's grades to her. Sometimes, as parents, we push and push, but ultimately the choice is theirs and I think that they rebel at all of the pushing. Let her know how important her decisions are to her future and then put it back in her lap as to what she's going to do about it. Let HER take responsibility for her own decisions. I know that it's easier said then done too! Good luck!

Can this be framed?!!??

Beautifully said Diana!

judy · 11-20-2007, 05:40 PM

It sounds like you're doing everything right. I was a high school teacher for years.
I retired just about a year ago, and believe it or not, I loved my kids. Teens are fun when they're not yours.

I promise you will live through this, and so will she. How's that nervous breakdown working for her? Does she hate you more than anything else in the universe, are you the absolute dumbest person she will ever meet, do you not understand the first thing about her and her priorities, and, while you're at it, are you to blame for every single thing that has gone wrong in her entire life? If so, then you are as good mother.

I found that with my own daughter and with my students, agreeing with them on these points (where appropriate - you do want to have serious discussions sometimes) worked for me. I also took the blame for the war we're having now, poverty, all illness, and any forest fires and/or droughts that occurred. Yes, it's all my fault, I'm a terrible, horrible person - now do what I told you anyway, or you're still grounded. And have that nervous breakdown quietly please. I want to watch my TV show.

By the way, my students really, really loved their mothers when we would talk
about it. Thy also took a lot more responsibility for themselves than they let their parents know. It's their job to drive their parents crazy.

11-20-2007, 01:40 PM	#1
DianaB Moderator Donating 4WT 13K Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Kansas Posts: 16,069	Teen age years!!!!! We should just lock them in a closet starting about age 14 and let them out when they're 20!!!!! I've got 3 that are well past teen years and one that's in the midst (15). One of the most important things that I can say about teens is to keep the communication open. Convey ALL of your concerns about your daughter's grades to her. Sometimes, as parents, we push and push, but ultimately the choice is theirs and I think that they rebel at all of the pushing. Let her know how important her decisions are to her future and then put it back in her lap as to what she's going to do about it. Let HER take responsibility for her own decisions. I know that it's easier said then done too! Good luck! __________________ ´¨) ¸.•´¸.•´¨) ¸.•*¨) (¸.•´ (¸.•` ¤ Diana Baker ✞ You and I are friends....... Always remember that if you fall I will pick you up...... After I stop laughing!!!

11-20-2007, 05:40 PM	#3
judy Donating 4WT Yakker Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Denver, NY Posts: 8,097	It sounds like you're doing everything right. I was a high school teacher for years. I retired just about a year ago, and believe it or not, I loved my kids. Teens are fun when they're not yours. I promise you will live through this, and so will she. How's that nervous breakdown working for her? Does she hate you more than anything else in the universe, are you the absolute dumbest person she will ever meet, do you not understand the first thing about her and her priorities, and, while you're at it, are you to blame for every single thing that has gone wrong in her entire life? If so, then you are as good mother. I found that with my own daughter and with my students, agreeing with them on these points (where appropriate - you do want to have serious discussions sometimes) worked for me. I also took the blame for the war we're having now, poverty, all illness, and any forest fires and/or droughts that occurred. Yes, it's all my fault, I'm a terrible, horrible person - now do what I told you anyway, or you're still grounded. And have that nervous breakdown quietly please. I want to watch my TV show. By the way, my students really, really loved their mothers when we would talk about it. Thy also took a lot more responsibility for themselves than they let their parents know. It's their job to drive their parents crazy. __________________ *Judy*

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