The last couple of weeks....

[Lindsey]

I haven't been around in awhile! Things have been so hectic here since I got back from New York!
As I mentioned before, I was seeing a really nice guy from work. I got back from NYC and things were still good. Then after that weekend all of a sudden he started pulling away and I felt something going weird and he finally said he thinks we need to take a step back until he figures out some stuff in his own life. And we were moving too fast and he wasn't ready to just jump right into something, but he wanted us to hang out as friends and build up slowly to where we could be in a relationship... we went bowling that night with my roommate and it felt so awkward to not get a hug good-bye or anything.. later that night I told him I felt weird and didn't understand so he came over and we talked until 5 am.... and not just about the relationship stuff but about everything in our lives! And I kind of understood... he jumped headfirst into his last relationship before knowing the girl well, and after 4 years it ended badly. He doesn't want to do the same this time. So I said okay, that was fine, we'll get to know each other and take things slowly.
Starting the next day, we had to work some crazy hours. A report was due this past monday so we worked until 2:30 am Thursday morning, 3:00 am Friday morning, 9:30 Friday night (so I had time to go out with a friend that night!), and then Saturday afternoon until 5.
We were still going to the Christmas party together. He picked me up and he looked SO GOOD. But I was determined to give him his space, we were just friends. We laughed and joked all night long... I left him in our hall (in a fancy hotel) to go crash a wedding dance in another hall with some other ladies from work By about 1 am we were all getting ready to leave but walked past another party so we all went in and took over the dance floor hahaha and he was having a good time too, he came out and danced with all of us girls We weren't ready to go home yet but everyone else was leaving, so he talked to some of his friends, and we went to my favorite bar where they were all hanging out. We were on the dance floor talking to them and we danced a little bit. And just being that close to him made me miss it sooo much... but he needed his space, I knew that. After the bar closed we headed to his friend's house and played some pool, where he beat me almost every time! And then since we were close to his house we went back there to watch stand-up comedy for a few hours... I asked if he would mind me just sleeping there instead of him driving across the city. He gave me some pj's to wear and we were laying in bed face-to-face, just inches from each other but not touching.... and we talked and he just poured his whole life out to me and his feelings he never talks about... and we got so much closer. We talked until 8 in the morning, and he thanked me for giving him such a great night and I told him that even if the rest of the relationship stops, I'm so glad to have that connection with him.
Soooo we rolled into work on Sunday at about 3 in the afternoon. We ended up staying until 4:30 am to get the report finished. We could have left sooner but we both kept coming up with excuses to stay.... I was worried that we would both just go home and I guess I kind of felt like this is my last chance... we were both being a little flirty and I was just having a great time giggling with him all night. He finally drove me home and I asked if he'd like to come in because I wasn't going to fall asleep anyway. He said he'd love to. And again, we talked and talked and talked.... He came to bed and told me that the night before he was tossing and turning all night because he kept wanting to cuddle with me but not knowing if he should. I told him it was okay if he wanted to, and was ready to. But we fell asleep with Layla in between us. The next day we woke up at noon and decided we had earned a day off lol.... and he cuddled me. And we cuddled for a few hours and then we kissed. And then we were like "That was too long away from this"
I like him so much. On Saturday someone said to us "I can't believe you guys are still getting along after spending so many stressful hours together!" just because of the work... having no idea that almost every night we still wanted to be around each other enough to hang out AFTER our crazy work hours. And I never once stopped smiling.
He's leaving today to go to the mountains to snowboard for a few days. I will see him on the 23rd on our last day of work, and we're both leaving early to go back to our hometowns. I won't see him again until after New Years. I'm a bit worried that he won't even miss me, or he'll just get over me or something because we'll be apart for a long time. But maybe it's normal to feel that way. I just feel like I found something good and I'm scared to lose it.

[pope1982]

I will be the first to admit, it has been a long time since I have been a single girl, but with my experience I have gained a wisdom through observation and conversation with my best friend over the years. I am by no means an expert!

I think what is happening here, is he is picking up on your intense feelings and you are scaring him. Not sure what his exact triggers, or the situation or either one of your personality irl in all honesty, but men are strange creatures.
You are going to have to try double time to tone down the looks, talk, whatever it may be that makes him feel like you are clinging, thus making him push away.

I say, let him go. Enjoy being the single girl you set out to be. If you still feel something once reunited afterwards, you have all the time in the world to continue getting to know one another.
Enjoy being friends, don't push for painful situations (the cuddling, inches from each others faces) if he wants to, but says he thinks it is a bad idea, say something goofy like "You are probably right, plus I need to brush my teeth anyway" to break the tension. Keep it light and casual, make him keep coming back wanting more. They love witty/goofy women who are smart with a sense of values they stick to.

It works the same way as how mysterious, play it cool type of men drive women wild. Good luck.

[Lindsey]

When we had our talk about it, he said what scared him was that HE had feelings. He was scared to get so far in so fast and he thought maybe the feelings would stop someday and we'd get hurt.... and I was like man it's okay we can slow down. No problem. I'm not ready to say I have a boyfriend yet and we're not dating, just seeing each other for now. There shouldn't be any pressure. But I absolutely did give him space when we were stepping back from it all... he made all the first moves for everything, other than the last night when I invited him in, and he said "I'd love to"
I am enjoying my single time too... in New York I found the hottest black guy I've seen in my life, and I danced with him, and then I kissed him a little And then I was like "I'm from Canada, bye" and I left... just like old Lindsey! And then I got our cute waiter's number, and I've actually added him to my facebook. We had fun flirting all night and he let us stay at the club until after close. And I had an absolute blast just hanging out with the girls for the whole week. But I always had Scott in the back of my mind, and it felt good to be back in his arms when I got home.
I was planning on not talking to him for this whole weekend snowboarding with his buddies, but he started texting me tonight, and so I replied of course... and he can't wait to get home to see me again.
I was worried this morning, but I'm not anymore. I just feel content. I know I can be single, and I can be happy being single... But I just feel so connected to him and I want to see where it goes.

[judy]

Do you ever sleep?

It sounds like a relationship is starting. He may drive you crazy for a while because he is afraid of being hurt. I think Pope said it all, very well. Play it very cool. (or not!)

Love ya,
Judy

[Lindsey]

Sleep is for the weak
He has been thinking about me the whole weekend he's been away. I thought this would be the chance for him to have his alone time and think either "I want to do this" or "I want out of this" and all signs are pointing to "I want to do this" I have been getting texts whenever he's not snowboarding. Last night we talked for awhile, and then he was going out to a bar with his friends and I was going to just sit at home and enjoy a night alone. I accidently fell asleep on the couch and woke up to a text at 2 am... "I really wish we could cuddle right now, I'm cold.... sorry for the late text" I was like awwwwww! I got up and went to bed and we texted a few more times before saying goodnight. He is going to be back really late tomorrow night, around 1 am. We will see each other anyway because we will both be leaving town on Tuesday for Christmas. I don't know when I'll be back but he won't be back until January 4th.
I really like this guy. I get butterflies everytime we touch! We can talk for hours, and I can be myself with him.

[HALEY]

Sleep is for the weak


wait till you work full time and have a kid to go home to. you'll be praying for sleep girl !!!!

[Lindsey]

lol I know I know I know... just hopefully it'll be another 5 to 10 years before I have to deal with that! I can work a 16 hour day and then go home with a guy and talk all night... not so sure I'd like a 16 hour day followed by a screaming baby though lol!

[HALEY]

Lindsey, i use to work 7 days a week girl, i had a bartending job ( which i loved) on the weekends.. i hardly ever slept.. i use to close the bar and stay there with Mike until 4-5 am... good old days, now i can't make it passed 9 pm, up at 4 am, cleaning, getting ready for work, getting Micah ready for daycare, back home, make dinner, clean, feed the baby, ready for bed, clothes, etc.. the never ending list, so enjoy now....
But the funny thing is , i wouldn't change one thing about it....

[Lindsey]

That's great Haley, and I hope when I'm in the same spot I'll love it enough to work as hard as you do! I'm already slowing down though... In college I could get home at 3 or 4 in the morning, have a little nap, wake up at 5 or 6 to do some homework, and then go to classes for 8 hours, and do it all over again! Now I need at LEAST 4 hours of sleep at night lol. The funny thing is, the less sleep I get at night, the more awake I feel during the day! When I have a long sleep I always feel so groggy and tired!

[HALEY]

its hard but soooo worth it,,, wait till your up every 3-4 hours for feedings,,, but when you look at the cute life your created, your heart melts....
i remember the first time Micah slept thru the night, Mike and i were so tired we woke up and ran like hell to micah room, to find him sleeping, i guess we made such a fuss running to his room to see if he was ok. we woke him up... oh boy ... it just scared us to death...

[judy]

It's so good to be young!

Staying out all night, having babies - NICE!