Being Taken Advantage Of!!!

[judy]

I really feel that you know who are taking advantage of me. I was talking to Jess yesterday, and she was telling me that they have an infestation of flies. We discussed that they were going to bomb the basement and I said I could take the kids and the 2 small dogs for the few hours that they have to be out of the house.

Well - guess who is coming??
Jess did apologize that she would prefer that they left it for tomorrow, and that they were all coming over to visit me for Father's Day. Steve doesn't want to leave it. I can't say that I blame him. Flies multiply very fast, and the sooner done, the better.

But...then Mackenzie called me back to see if they were sleeping over. No...I'm getting my nails done in the morning. Thanks goodness! I had them last weekend, and have been over there helping out a lot.

I feel like..gee, could you find the blank time to come over here and finish up the work you never finished????

I am truly angry that they can't manage to get over here and do my house after all this time, but I have time to babysit so they can do whatever they need to do.

I called my cleaning person's boss today and am getting a few guys over this week to move whatever needs to be put upstairs, downstairs, and in the basement at least. I would prefer that Steve hang the pictures, mirrors and curtain rods because he does such a good job. I also never have to worry about anything not being sturdy and falling on the kids, me or the dogs. I'll see. If it's not done by next weekend, I may call this guy again and just get it done. Or...if I like the way they work, I amy just have them do it when they come. He's going to charge me $35/hour for 2 or 3 guys.

[Janet]

Judy....I hope it doesn't end with it blowing up in your face for holding this all in. Letting it fester isn't a good thing. I guess I'm lucky....I do most everything around here. Rick wouldn't know how to hang a picture if he had a blueprint...lolol If I lived closer, I'd come do it for you.....I even have my own toolbox and it has everything!

[Gina]

Originally Posted by Janet

Judy....I hope it doesn't end with it blowing up in your face for holding this all in. Letting it fester isn't a good thing. I guess I'm lucky....I do most everything around here. Rick wouldn't know how to hang a picture if he had a blueprint...lolol If I lived closer, I'd come do it for you.....I even have my own toolbox and it has everything!

Janet what a woman!!!

Judy I feel for you, I guess the best thing to do is hire someone.. Shame but what can you do.

[gja1000]

Judy, I really think that he just doesn't want to do the work, but doesn't know how to tell you. I'd just go ahead and have the guys who are coming do the work. Then, I'd just tell Steve that you decided to go ahead and get it done while they were here, so he wouldn't have to do it - or that it was just spontaneous that you had them do it. I bet he'll be relieved.

I agree, don't let it fester - just get it done.

Good luck!

[Marilyn]

JUdy, please try to not let this hurt your relationship with your daughter and sil. You were worried about this when you moved there. Just keep cool and if you feel that they are imposing a bit, you can gently make some plans without them once in a while.

You seem, from what we get to see, that you are really enjoying your new home and your relationship with your family. It takes work, as you well know, to make our relationships work. None of them are anywhere near perfect on their own.

Gayle has a great suggestion with regard to how to have someone else do the work and explain it to your sil.

Huggs to you!!!!!

[judy]

You are all 100% right.

The first thing I did when yesterday was to ask Marcia (my cleaning person) to call her boss so that I could make arrangements. That was even before I found out that they were bringing the kids over. Then, when I found out that I was getting the kids, I came on here to vent.

Then, my friend called me and she told me about the roller coaster ride she had to go on, just to get her son to come over to his 94 year old grandmother's to connect her new TV converter box. We were laughing at how it is to have grown children. She said it would have been easier to just buy her mom a new TV and get her cable service, but try teaching a 94 year old woman how to work all those things. Her mom still drives! She is adorable.


I think you are so right Gina. He doesn't want to do it. I have to see what kind of work these guys do, and if they ever show up! You know how workers can be. If they seem okay, I will let them do all of the work. I was already planning on using the excuse you wrote about! We're on the same wavelength - maybe it's a Brooklyn state of mind.

I am also now never obligated to ask Steve to do any work for me. This is a good thing. It is never good to get involved with family in that way, unless you are certain they will do whatever for you. I need to find a good handyman now, and that's that.

What really saves me from blowing up is that I so enjoy the kids when they are here. I had such a good time with them yesterday. They only stayed about 3 or 4 hours, and it took me 20 minutes to straighten up. I do have to go over the floors, but that's not their fault. These floors are terrible, but the kids are so great! Jessie also knows what is going on, and I know it is difficult for her, but she has to keep her hubby happy. As long as she and I know what is really going on, I can live with it. She has to keep him happy. That's the kind of marriage she has. He's so good to her and the children, it is okay. He's good to me too in his way. I do love him.


Wahoo! The guy just called me and I asked him about hanging the pictures, etc. He's going to work it out for me.

FREEDOM ROCKS!!!

[DianaB]

I'm glad that you've found someone to finish up things for you. Once it's done you can forget that Steve kept you hanging for so long and then you won't be so upset with him. It was really stinky of him to keep you stringing along for so long though. It's time to put it in the past and move on. Your poor daughter must really walk on egg shells around him. How sad. It sounds like you were able to enjoy the kids. You're a good Grandma!!!

[Janet]

I am so happy to read that things are working out. What a relief to you. Maybe I should start a "Janet's Handywoman" shop or something?