I Think Mom Is Starting To Fade.......

[Janet]

Mom hasn't been doing very well the last few days. I told the visiting nurse today about my concerns. Mom has stayed at a steady 134.7 lbs for quite some time now. But a few days ago, she has dropped to 127.2 lbs. She's not eating well. Food doesn't taste good and she gets sick to her stomach so she quits eating. She also has trouble getting some of the nasty pills down and will vomit. This goes on every day. The Drs don't seem too concerned because they said there is really nothing that can be done to help her except maybe some anti-nausea medicine. She has been staying in bed for the last two days with very little energy. The home health aide came and was able to give her a bath and I am very thankful for that. I'm really not sure what to do since I've let her Dr and nurse know. Monday we go to the kidney Dr. and to have labs done so maybe she will find some kind of comfort.

[gja1000]

I think this would be a good time to try hospice again. Seems like there was some sort of misunderstanding the last time about dialysis. Am I remembering correctly? I think hospice could really help a lot. She needs comfort care right now, and hospice is usually the best at providing comfort care.

[Janet]

Thank you Gayle....I was thinking today of contacting them. I will be doing that on Monday after her appt. with the kidney dr.

You were right in remembering there was some sort of misunderstanding. One Dr. thought she needed it right away and the other Dr. couldn't understand why. They also sent out a very young man to speak with us and he acted like it was his first day on the job... lol.

[DianaB]

Janet, I'm so sorry to hear that about your Mom. I know that it has to be really hard to see her getting weaker. You are both in my prayers. I think that Gayle is right......it's time to contact hospice again.

[Tiramisu]

She must be so tired. I know youre tired and that you will hold on as long as you can. Get all the help you can and keep her comfortable.

My Mom's been gone three years this week.

[Janet]

I am so sorry this sort of anniversary is coming up for you Sandy. I know it has to be hard.

You're right....I am tired, but so is Mom. The thing I'm having trouble with now is that she is finding it hard to swallow food. She can chew, but it doesn't want to go down she says. I will speak with the kidney Dr and nurses and see what they say and then make an appt with her regular Dr. It's hard not knowing what to do or which Dr. to contact. If it wasn't for Gayle....I'd be more crazy than I am.

[gja1000]

It probably should be her regular doc to tell about the swallowing problem. She needs palliative care, commonly called "comfort care" right now. I bet a hospice nurse would know what to do. I hope you can contact them.

[Janet]

I will on Monday, for sure....Thank you so much Gayle.

[judy]

I am so sad for you and Mom, Janet. It sounds like she is suffering.

The hospice will be more responsive to you since you have inquired before.

[Blueyes]

Janet, if I had a do-over I wouldn't have put my mom through the "testing and doctoring" that went on after her stroke. In my humble opinion, when an elderly body begins to shut down it should be allowed to do so when a doctors intervention only prolongs the inevitable. Call Hospice again please. I know how hard it is Janet, but I also know how strong you are. God Bless you both. Love you!

[Janet]

I will be calling Hospice tomorrow. I have to make sure the Dr says it's for heart failure. If we say kidney failure, Mom would have to quit dialysis and she doesn't want to do that yet. She is sleeping alot. Tonight I made spaghetti and garlic bread. She ate a few bites and then promptly threw it up in the trash. I just don't understand why she can't eat without throwing it up. Tonight when I weighed her before going on dialysis...she dropped down to 126.2 lbs. Her clothes look huge on her now.

[gja1000]

I just don't understand why hospice requires someone in kidney failure to go off dialysis - I don't think that is right.

But yes, the doctor should say it is heart failure.

[Janet]

I don't think it's right either. Her BP is 90/57 this morning. Very light headed and passed out once. Her weight is now 125.6. She's eating breakfast right now...I hope she can keep it down.

[Blueyes]

It's because dialysis is considered a life saving measure, and hospice is for palliative (comfort measures only) care. It may seem harsh, but hospice is end of life care. I love you, Janet. My heart is with you.

[Lindsey]

I just want to say I'm very sorry Janet and I am praying for you both.