The Average Cost Of A Wedding Today

[rivermom]

I was driving down the drive to go feed Wildflower and on the radio they were discussing weddings.

It was said that the average cost of a wedding today is $27.850 OMG!!

That is just insane and I honestly wonder how parents can afford to give their daughter (s) such an expensive wedding??

I feel my hubby and I make a normal decent wage but there is just no way we could ever afford to give this much money towards our kid's weddings. And to be honest, even if we could afford it we'd still opt out and give them funds to help out with a much smaller wedding.

[Mandy]

I know Sheryl, its rediculous. Almost 3 years ago we got married, i wanted it all... and i made sure i had it all.... but my goodness, the price-tags are insane! For a LONG time, i didnt even want to know the total costs. It was perfect, and exactly the way i wanted it.

[Gina]

Yes it is crazy and I know back here in the east it can run much higher than the 26,000. I have one of each and if I am helping with college payments , they will be on their own for weddings. I can give what I can afford...With these prices your better off having a smaller wedding and putting a down payment on a home.

[AngieDoogles]

Originally Posted by Gina

With these prices your better off having a smaller wedding and putting a down payment on a home.

I agree! My hubby and I chose to have a semi small wedding (only 100 people) and we're SO glad we did. We were also lucky enough to have friends who could do the cake, photography, catering, etc. so we didn't have to pay for a lot of stuff. I would much rather have a house than a huge, expensive wedding.

[rivermom]

My parents have friends w/ two girls. Well when it was their time for a wedding the offer was given from the parents to their girls. Either a wedding or a down payment on a home. Well, I know for sure one of the girls opted for the wedding. I am not sure about their other daughter.

I myself would have picked the down payment to a house without a blink of an eye!

I feel weddings can be just as special small and quaint yet I do understand women who "want it all" for their weddings too.

[AngieDoogles]

Originally Posted by rivermom

I myself would have picked the down payment to a house without a blink of an eye!

Me too! I just can't WAIT to be a homeowner. And I still feel that my wedding was lovely even though we didn't have a super huge budget. It was perfect for us. So yes, definitely the house.

[Marilyn]

Some dear friends of ours married 3 years ago. Their parents were not in a position to help plan the wedding and definitely could not help pay for it. The couple had very little funds as well. He was a school teacher at the time and she a college student. They ask me to be their wedding planner and instead of bride's maid and groomsmen, they had 4 significant couples, 2 for the bride and two for the groom. My hubby and I stood with the groom. It was a wonderful experience to help them in this way. With a little creativity, they were able to have a big (~250 guest) church wedding for less than $5,000 (not including the rings). The reception was cake, punch, coffee nuts and mints, no meal or dance, but it was very nice. The reception dinner (50 guests) was at our home. We moved the living room furniture out and setup tables and were able to seat everyone. The largest single expense other than her rings, of course, was the wedding cake. We did not have anyone who could bake it as a gift so we had to use a bakery. The photographer was retired but still had his equipment and took the pictures as a wedding gift with the bride and groom paying him only his costs for the film and processing. The flowers (real) were bought bulk from a shop in a grocery store and a relative made the arrangements, corsages, boutineres, bouquets and such. We even cut greenry for the bouquets and arrangements from shrubbery and ferns in the yards of friends. The dress was from David's Bridal with a friend doing the alterations for free. There were a lot of little details and we did all the decorating the night before. I learned a lot. We printed the invitations with my inkjet printer on some handmade paper we bought at Hobby Lobby. This was a great experience. I kept a binder of what we did for future reference. We have two daughters and are currently putting them both through college.

[AngieDoogles]

Originally Posted by Marilyn

Some dear friends of ours married 3 years ago. Their parents were not in a position to help plan the wedding and definitely could not help pay for it. The couple had very little funds as well. He was a school teacher at the time and she a college student. They ask me to be their wedding planner and instead of bride's maid and groomsmen, they had 4 significant couples, 2 for the bride and two for the groom. My hubby and I stood with the groom. It was a wonderful experience to help them in this way. With a little creativity, they were able to have a big (~250 guest) church wedding for less than $5,000 (not including the rings). The reception was cake, punch, coffee nuts and mints, no meal or dance, but it was very nice. The reception dinner (50 guests) was at our home. We moved the living room furniture out and setup tables and were able to seat everyone. The largest single expense other than her rings, of course, was the wedding cake. We did not have anyone who could bake it as a gift so we had to use a bakery. The photographer was retired but still had his equipment and took the pictures as a wedding gift with the bride and groom paying him only his costs for the film and processing. The flowers (real) were bought bulk from a shop in a grocery store and a relative made the arrangements, corsages, boutineres, bouquets and such. We even cut greenry for the bouquets and arrangements from shrubbery and ferns in the yards of friends. The dress was from David's Bridal with a friend doing the alterations for free. There were a lot of little details and we did all the decorating the night before. I learned a lot. We printed the invitations with my inkjet printer on some handmade paper we bought at Hobby Lobby. This was a great experience. I kept a binder of what we did for future reference. We have two daughters and are currently putting them both through college.

That sounds like the sweetest wedding! That was so nice of you to help out so much! They are very lucky to have you as a friend.

[Amber_lv]

Oh i hear ya weddings are way to expensive i got married in 2004 and it cost over $18,000 and it wasn't really extravgent it was very beautiful but i almost died when my mom tols me what she had paid

[Janet]

My 26 year old neice is getting married in October. She is the daughter of my older closest brother. She doesn't want a big wedding, only immediate family, which leaves out aunts, uncles..etc. She wants a huge reception with a band, drinks, everything. AND she expects my brother to pay for it. He will too! She is so selfish and well just a bi**h and if she causes him to have another heart attack over the pressure of trying to keep her happy, I'll let her know about it and never forgive her.

She's living with the guy and since they can't afford to pay for it, she expects her mom and dad to. Well, since I'm not invited to the wedding, I'll save her dad a few bucks and stay away from the reception too. And a gift....not going to happen.

I know I sound horrible about this, but my brother can not afford it and my niece is so strong willed, selfish, spoiled and ungrateful, that when it's all over with, she won't even thank them. She told them once that she was never going to get a job, she didn't ask to be born, so it was their job to take care of her. ugh!!!!!

[Marilyn]

Originally Posted by Janet

My 26 year old neice is getting married in October. She is the daughter of my older closest brother. She doesn't want a big wedding, only immediate family, which leaves out aunts, uncles..etc. She wants a huge reception with a band, drinks, everything. AND she expects my brother to pay for it. He will too! She is so selfish and well just a bi**h and if she causes him to have another heart attack over the pressure of trying to keep her happy, I'll let her know about it and never forgive her.

She's living with the guy and since they can't afford to pay for it, she expects her mom and dad to. Well, since I'm not invited to the wedding, I'll save her dad a few bucks and stay away from the reception too. And a gift....not going to happen.

I know I sound horrible about this, but my brother can not afford it and my niece is so strong willed, selfish, spoiled and ungrateful, that when it's all over with, she won't even thank them. She told them once that she was never going to get a job, she didn't ask to be born, so it was their job to take care of her. ugh!!!!!

That's awful!!! From the sound of it, they should get a couple of close friends together and find a JP. That's what my parent's did. Of course, it was during the 1950's and they had very little money. It was my father's second marriage. They took pictures, and it was actually very nice and tasteful.

[Janet]

She could have a very nice wedding without putting her parents in financial straits. It just breaks my heart for her to treat my brother (her father) like that. She is getting married in a church, but she is sooooo VERY heavy that she doesn't want to get married in a gown, she's going to wear a pant suit. That's also why she doesn't want anyone but immediate family. So she'll spend all they have on a reception.

My brother told me that I may not want my son at the reception because of all the drinking....I can't figure out if that's his way of saying no kids...(Rick is 16) or leaving it up to me. If Rick isn't invited we definitely won't be going. We have always included his two daughters in everything. If Rick is allowed to attend, we may go for 30 - 60 minutes, but that will be it. Just so they can't say we didn't show up.

I guess I shouldn't let it bother me and I woudn't if it doesn't scare me about my brother having another heart attack due to the stress. He's already had two and survived, thank God.

[rivermom]

Originally Posted by Janet

She could have a very nice wedding without putting her parents in financial straits. It just breaks my heart for her to treat my brother (her father) like that. She is getting married in a church, but she is sooooo VERY heavy that she doesn't want to get married in a gown, she's going to wear a pant suit. That's also why she doesn't want anyone but immediate family. So she'll spend all they have on a reception.

My brother told me that I may not want my son at the reception because of all the drinking....I can't figure out if that's his way of saying no kids...(Rick is 16) or leaving it up to me. If Rick isn't invited we definitely won't be going. We have always included his two daughters in everything. If Rick is allowed to attend, we may go for 30 - 60 minutes, but that will be it. Just so they can't say we didn't show up.

I guess I shouldn't let it bother me and I woudn't if it doesn't scare me about my brother having another heart attack due to the stress. He's already had two and survived, thank God.

Does your Brother (her Dad) want to pay for it? Is he excited about planning all the arangements and being involved? If so, then possibly he wont be stressed out and you wont have to worry about his health, etc.

What about your Brother's wife - is she excited too? I think the women get more involved anyway's then the men do planning this sorta thing, I dunno.

Hopefully all the arrangements will go smoothly, you will go because it's your brother and you are there for him, everyone relaxed and enjoying themselves.

Weddings should be a celebration right? It's sad to see all the chaos that a wedding can bring.

[AngieDoogles]

Originally Posted by Janet

My 26 year old neice is getting married in October. She is the daughter of my older closest brother. She doesn't want a big wedding, only immediate family, which leaves out aunts, uncles..etc. She wants a huge reception with a band, drinks, everything. AND she expects my brother to pay for it. He will too! She is so selfish and well just a bi**h and if she causes him to have another heart attack over the pressure of trying to keep her happy, I'll let her know about it and never forgive her.

She's living with the guy and since they can't afford to pay for it, she expects her mom and dad to. Well, since I'm not invited to the wedding, I'll save her dad a few bucks and stay away from the reception too. And a gift....not going to happen.

I know I sound horrible about this, but my brother can not afford it and my niece is so strong willed, selfish, spoiled and ungrateful, that when it's all over with, she won't even thank them. She told them once that she was never going to get a job, she didn't ask to be born, so it was their job to take care of her. ugh!!!!!

That's awful...and SO sad that she is treating your family that way. I'm sorry her negative attitude is hurting you so much. You don't sound horrible at all; she does.

[Janet]

My borther has two daughters. The older one is so sweet and caring. This younger one thinks eveyone owes her, because her mother gave in to everything. I've seen my brother at 58 years old, hop in his car and peel out (like a teenager) because he gets so upset and his wife always sides with their daughter.

Yes, he is excited for the wedding, but part of it is he won't have to keep supporting her, so he hopes. My brother and SIL still pay for this daughters car insurance and other things. She has a good paying job, but blows it. At 26 years old she still doesn't balance her check book. Uses the ATM and forgets to write it down and then goes to her mom who gives her money.

Yes you're right Sheryl, I'll go to the reception, but we won't be staying. I will take my son and once the drinks start taking over, we will leave, like I said, probably no more than an hour.

When I asked my SIL the other day how come Dusti wasn't paying for most of it since she lives with the guy, she told me that they can't afford anything. The guy she lives with isn't working....oh great...then why hurry and get married. Why not wait until they are financially stable. I mean, she already lives with him. I guess I'm just too old to understand. I know I probably made mistakes here and there with my son, but I used their parenting practices as what NOT TO DO, in raising my son. They think I'm too hard on him, but I know I'm not. He doesn't talk to me or my husband like we are dirt and we owe him, like my niece does her parents.

Oh and btw, it's not like this wedding is causing real problems...I just worry about my brother. He walked me down the aisle because Dad had passed by the time I got married. He's everything to me. I just don't like him being taken advantage of by his daughter or his wife. BUT, the good thing is, I do keep my opinions to myself and don't discuss it with them. They'll do what they want anyway, so it wouldn't do any good except cause hard feelings. I could never let something come between me and my brother. He has such a good heart.