Continuing Saga of the Cheer Coach

DianaB · 08-27-2007, 10:59 AM

For those of you who haven't read about our Cheer Coach problems here's a link to my other discussion about our problems.

http://www.4womentalk.com/forums/showthread.php?t=2528

I have absolutely had it with our Cheer Coach! She is nothing but a trouble-maker. Thursday afternoon and evening our high school had a volleyball and football scrimmage (which is where we have a game but we just play ourself. No other teams.) So the cheerleaders were divided in half so each side would have it's own cheerleaders. (Now, let me explain a little bit about our cheerleading squad, we have 6 cheerleaders who were on the squad last year and 6 cheerleaders who are new to the squad.) The cheerleading squad was divided up with the experienced cheerleaders on one side (and it was where most of the crowd and pep club sat) and the new cheerleaders on the other side (where hardly anyone sat).

Before the game started the captain and co-captain of the team switched back and forth between the squads but when the game actually started they were both on the same side. The new cheerleaders were left with no leader, even the coach sat with the experienced cheerleaders. The girls really struggled with doing the cheers, since they don't have them memorized as well as the other girls, but they did the best they could. My daughter and a friend of hers took over as leaders, but still they didn't look as good doing their cheers as the more experienced girls.

The coach's reasoning for dividing them up this way was because "you never know when the captain, co-captain, and the more experienced girls will be gone and you'll have to cheer without them." The girls were really embarassed at being out there with no leader and the coach did it to them on purpose!! I've already talked to the athletic director and he says that the girls need to talk to her on their own, but she has threatened and intimidated them until they're scared of her. If there's any more stuff like this that goes on I'm going to pull her out of cheer. It has been a whole summer of stuff like this and I'm tired of it. Thanks for letting me vent!!!!

Emmsmom · 08-27-2007, 05:10 PM

From one cheer mom to another.. ((HUGS)) I feel your pain becuase I have had to deal with a really bad cheer coach myself. I was just lucky she quit on her own after so many complaints. Hope things get better SOON! HUGS,

AngieDoogles · 08-28-2007, 04:08 AM

Aww, Diana! I'm sorry this is still going on. That must be so frustrating for both you and your daughter when it should be a fun experience. I'm sorry the coach is making things difficult. *hugs* I hope it all works out soon!

DianaB · 08-28-2007, 07:46 AM

It was my daughter's first time to actually cheer in front of a crowd and I know that she was disappointed in herself for not doing better. Considering it was her first time and they didn't have any leadership I thought that they did a wonderful job. It's just that they knew that they weren't performing as well as the more experienced cheerleaders.

I thought that cheer was suppose to be fun but this certainly hasn't been. If there's any more problems my daughter has decided to quit and I agree with her.

I'm not a mom who causes trouble at the schools. In fact after 4 kids going through the schools this is the first time that I have been in the office to complain, but I've had enough. There is so much more that I could tell you about, but it would take too much time to write and read.

DianaB · 08-28-2007, 07:55 AM

Michelle, how did you deal with it? It's hard because I'm not suppose to talk directly to the coach. My daughter has to talk to her if she has a problem but they've all been threatened that if there's a lot of complaining then the school will do away with the cheer program. When I talked to the athletics director about this he said that this had been talked about it but there's no plans to actually do it unless things turn really bad. Anyway the girls are afraid to talk to her even if the athletics director is there with them. They're scared of her so she gets away with everything! A lot of the moms don't even know (or care) about the way that she treats our girls because they just want their daughter to be a cheerleader. I care about how MY daughter is treated!

Did you have problems like this? How did you handle it? Did you go to the school board?

AngieDoogles · 08-28-2007, 10:34 AM

Diana, I don't know what to tell you! It sounds like you are in such a bad spot right now. Hopefully someone will have some good advice for you...

Mandy · 08-29-2007, 03:10 AM

Hmmm.... cheerleading is supose to be FUN, and not for any of the girls to get all frustrated, and stressed out. Diana, i wouldnt blame your daughter if she quit, and ofcourse, you care about the way they treat your daughter. Hope it all works out for you, and her.

Emmsmom · 08-29-2007, 08:14 AM

Well my case was a little different.. It wasn't at school. This was at a private gym.. She is a competitve cheerleader. I didn't say to much to the coach becuase to be honest it made it worse on the kids. They usually take it out on the kids.. Sad but true! I went straight to the owner of the gym and complained. There were several moms that complained A LOT!

I would say that you should try and talked to the other moms and see if their girls are also having problems. The newbies I mean. If they are then you would have more of a case. If that didn't work then I would go to the school board!

I think your daughter is wise to think about quitting if things don't improve.Cheering should be fun! When she starts to complain about not wanting to go to practice then you will know that she has had enough. Kids either love or hate cheering! Emmie was ready to quit because of her coach and at the last min the coach decided to leave!

I can see the hard spot you are in... I know I hated to to see the way Emmie was treated. I do know talking to the coach will make things worse... You know come to think of it....I made a point of being at most all of the practices as did other moms... With us there the coach wasn't so eager to pick on the kids and be so mean. You know at times like this a small videao camera would come in REAL handy!!

Try asking your daughter if it really bothers her. Also, is something that she can handle and deal with ?... TO be honest it is much harder on us. Good luck....

DianaB · 08-29-2007, 08:35 AM

Thanks, Michelle. It's not possible for parents to attend the cheer practices because it's school policy. And I know what you mean that they take it out on the girls. She hasn't bothered my daughter too much as far as punishments go because I've already confronted her about punishments and told her if there was a problem again that we'd be talking.

As far as the other moms go, several of them are not happy either but they're afraid of causing trouble at the school or between the coach and their daughter. I think that at the end of the year when they renew the coach's contract that several of the moms will be at the school board meeting to make sure that she doesn't coach another year.

I'm hoping that things will settle down and it will get better. I keep thinking that once they can actually cheer in front of a crowd that my daughter will enjoy being in cheer, but it depends on what goes on and how she's treated.

We have a football game on Friday night so we'll see how things go. I'm hoping that I have a good report for you!!!!

Jaci on Friday Night!!!

DianaB · 09-01-2007, 09:29 AM

I just wanted to let everyone know that last night's cheer went pretty good. Jaci got to finally cheer like she should have with the rest of the group. They still had some organizational problems but they weren't caused by the coach. There's some problems within the cheer group that need to get worked out, but they don't involve my daughter. She had a few problems remembering how the cheers went but that's to be expected with a beginner.

She wanted to quit but I talked her into going this time, hoping that it would be something that she would enjoy and now she's talking about staying in as long as there aren't more problems with the coach.

Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that things went much better!!! I'm a happy Mom!!!

AngieDoogles · 09-05-2007, 06:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DianaB

I just wanted to let everyone know that last night's cheer went pretty good. Jaci got to finally cheer like she should have with the rest of the group. They still had some organizational problems but they weren't caused by the coach. There's some problems within the cheer group that need to get worked out, but they don't involve my daughter. She had a few problems remembering how the cheers went but that's to be expected with a beginner.

She wanted to quit but I talked her into going this time, hoping that it would be something that she would enjoy and now she's talking about staying in as long as there aren't more problems with the coach.

Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that things went much better!!! I'm a happy Mom!!!

I'm glad things went well Diana!

I'm really hope things work out for her and that this will be something she enjoys, but if the coach continues to be a problem, it might be best to find another activity she could do instead. Anyway, congrats!

08-27-2007, 10:59 AM	#1
DianaB Moderator Donating 4WT 13K Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Kansas Posts: 16,069	Continuing Saga of the Cheer Coach For those of you who haven't read about our Cheer Coach problems here's a link to my other discussion about our problems. http://www.4womentalk.com/forums/showthread.php?t=2528 I have absolutely had it with our Cheer Coach! She is nothing but a trouble-maker. Thursday afternoon and evening our high school had a volleyball and football scrimmage (which is where we have a game but we just play ourself. No other teams.) So the cheerleaders were divided in half so each side would have it's own cheerleaders. (Now, let me explain a little bit about our cheerleading squad, we have 6 cheerleaders who were on the squad last year and 6 cheerleaders who are new to the squad.) The cheerleading squad was divided up with the experienced cheerleaders on one side (and it was where most of the crowd and pep club sat) and the new cheerleaders on the other side (where hardly anyone sat). Before the game started the captain and co-captain of the team switched back and forth between the squads but when the game actually started they were both on the same side. The new cheerleaders were left with no leader, even the coach sat with the experienced cheerleaders. The girls really struggled with doing the cheers, since they don't have them memorized as well as the other girls, but they did the best they could. My daughter and a friend of hers took over as leaders, but still they didn't look as good doing their cheers as the more experienced girls. The coach's reasoning for dividing them up this way was because "you never know when the captain, co-captain, and the more experienced girls will be gone and you'll have to cheer without them." The girls were really embarassed at being out there with no leader and the coach did it to them on purpose!! I've already talked to the athletic director and he says that the girls need to talk to her on their own, but she has threatened and intimidated them until they're scared of her. If there's any more stuff like this that goes on I'm going to pull her out of cheer. It has been a whole summer of stuff like this and I'm tired of it. Thanks for letting me vent!!!! __________________ ´¨) ¸.•´¸.•´¨) ¸.•*¨) (¸.•´ (¸.•` ¤ Diana Baker ✞ You and I are friends....... Always remember that if you fall I will pick you up...... After I stop laughing!!!

08-27-2007, 05:10 PM	#2
Emmsmom Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Posts: 612	From one cheer mom to another.. ((HUGS)) I feel your pain becuase I have had to deal with a really bad cheer coach myself. I was just lucky she quit on her own after so many complaints. Hope things get better SOON! HUGS, __________________ MICHELLE

08-28-2007, 04:08 AM	#3
AngieDoogles Donating 4WT 4000 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 6,509	Aww, Diana! I'm sorry this is still going on. That must be so frustrating for both you and your daughter when it should be a fun experience. I'm sorry the coach is making things difficult. hugs I hope it all works out soon! __________________ "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." ~MT

08-28-2007, 07:46 AM	#4
DianaB Moderator Donating 4WT 13K Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Kansas Posts: 16,069	It was my daughter's first time to actually cheer in front of a crowd and I know that she was disappointed in herself for not doing better. Considering it was her first time and they didn't have any leadership I thought that they did a wonderful job. It's just that they knew that they weren't performing as well as the more experienced cheerleaders. I thought that cheer was suppose to be fun but this certainly hasn't been. If there's any more problems my daughter has decided to quit and I agree with her. I'm not a mom who causes trouble at the schools. In fact after 4 kids going through the schools this is the first time that I have been in the office to complain, but I've had enough. There is so much more that I could tell you about, but it would take too much time to write and read. __________________ ´¨) ¸.•´¸.•´¨) ¸.•*¨) (¸.•´ (¸.•` ¤ Diana Baker ✞ You and I are friends....... Always remember that if you fall I will pick you up...... After I stop laughing!!!

08-28-2007, 07:55 AM	#5
DianaB Moderator Donating 4WT 13K Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Kansas Posts: 16,069	Michelle, how did you deal with it? It's hard because I'm not suppose to talk directly to the coach. My daughter has to talk to her if she has a problem but they've all been threatened that if there's a lot of complaining then the school will do away with the cheer program. When I talked to the athletics director about this he said that this had been talked about it but there's no plans to actually do it unless things turn really bad. Anyway the girls are afraid to talk to her even if the athletics director is there with them. They're scared of her so she gets away with everything! A lot of the moms don't even know (or care) about the way that she treats our girls because they just want their daughter to be a cheerleader. I care about how MY daughter is treated! Did you have problems like this? How did you handle it? Did you go to the school board? __________________ ´¨) ¸.•´¸.•´¨) ¸.•*¨) (¸.•´ (¸.•` ¤ Diana Baker ✞ You and I are friends....... Always remember that if you fall I will pick you up...... After I stop laughing!!!

08-28-2007, 10:34 AM	#6
AngieDoogles Donating 4WT 4000 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 6,509	Diana, I don't know what to tell you! It sounds like you are in such a bad spot right now. Hopefully someone will have some good advice for you... __________________ "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." ~MT

08-29-2007, 03:10 AM	#7
Mandy Donating 4WT 4000 Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Who cares! Posts: 4,587	Hmmm.... cheerleading is supose to be FUN, and not for any of the girls to get all frustrated, and stressed out. Diana, i wouldnt blame your daughter if she quit, and ofcourse, you care about the way they treat your daughter. Hope it all works out for you, and her. __________________ Many people will walk in and out your life, but only true friends leave footprints!

08-29-2007, 08:14 AM	#8
Emmsmom Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Posts: 612	Well my case was a little different.. It wasn't at school. This was at a private gym.. She is a competitve cheerleader. I didn't say to much to the coach becuase to be honest it made it worse on the kids. They usually take it out on the kids.. Sad but true! I went straight to the owner of the gym and complained. There were several moms that complained A LOT! I would say that you should try and talked to the other moms and see if their girls are also having problems. The newbies I mean. If they are then you would have more of a case. If that didn't work then I would go to the school board! I think your daughter is wise to think about quitting if things don't improve.Cheering should be fun! When she starts to complain about not wanting to go to practice then you will know that she has had enough. Kids either love or hate cheering! Emmie was ready to quit because of her coach and at the last min the coach decided to leave! I can see the hard spot you are in... I know I hated to to see the way Emmie was treated. I do know talking to the coach will make things worse... You know come to think of it....I made a point of being at most all of the practices as did other moms... With us there the coach wasn't so eager to pick on the kids and be so mean. You know at times like this a small videao camera would come in REAL handy!! Try asking your daughter if it really bothers her. Also, is something that she can handle and deal with ?... TO be honest it is much harder on us. Good luck.... __________________ MICHELLE

08-29-2007, 08:35 AM	#9
DianaB Moderator Donating 4WT 13K Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Kansas Posts: 16,069	Thanks, Michelle. It's not possible for parents to attend the cheer practices because it's school policy. And I know what you mean that they take it out on the girls. She hasn't bothered my daughter too much as far as punishments go because I've already confronted her about punishments and told her if there was a problem again that we'd be talking. As far as the other moms go, several of them are not happy either but they're afraid of causing trouble at the school or between the coach and their daughter. I think that at the end of the year when they renew the coach's contract that several of the moms will be at the school board meeting to make sure that she doesn't coach another year. I'm hoping that things will settle down and it will get better. I keep thinking that once they can actually cheer in front of a crowd that my daughter will enjoy being in cheer, but it depends on what goes on and how she's treated. We have a football game on Friday night so we'll see how things go. I'm hoping that I have a good report for you!!!! Jaci on Friday Night!!! __________________ ´¨) ¸.•´¸.•´¨) ¸.•*¨) (¸.•´ (¸.•` ¤ Diana Baker ✞ You and I are friends....... Always remember that if you fall I will pick you up...... After I stop laughing!!!

09-01-2007, 09:29 AM	#10
DianaB Moderator Donating 4WT 13K Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Kansas Posts: 16,069	I just wanted to let everyone know that last night's cheer went pretty good. Jaci got to finally cheer like she should have with the rest of the group. They still had some organizational problems but they weren't caused by the coach. There's some problems within the cheer group that need to get worked out, but they don't involve my daughter. She had a few problems remembering how the cheers went but that's to be expected with a beginner. She wanted to quit but I talked her into going this time, hoping that it would be something that she would enjoy and now she's talking about staying in as long as there aren't more problems with the coach. Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that things went much better!!! I'm a happy Mom!!! __________________ ´¨) ¸.•´¸.•´¨) ¸.•*¨) (¸.•´ (¸.•` ¤ Diana Baker ✞ You and I are friends....... Always remember that if you fall I will pick you up...... After I stop laughing!!!

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